I'm a woman & I just became a daddy today! No trolling, not kidding!
As for the babies father, he threated my SIL in public. Said if she didn't abort he would kill her and the baby. When the police investigator got into his e-mail or facebook messaging he had a letter sent to either a cousin or friend offering $2000 to kill my SIL. He was charged with terroristic threats, attempting a forced abortion by physical and emotional abuse, attempted murdermurdered. He got 2 years for the first, 3 for the second & 5 for the third.
Granted I am not blood related, I am her brothers wife. But I've known her and the family for 15 years. I was there when her oldest son was brought home. My kids are by my first husband. We divorced in 08, my current DH and I married in July of 10. We were surprised by a dd that he had and wss never told of 5 Weeks later. After problems with the BM. Her rights were basically forcefully given up so she didn't get prison time. & I adopted DD at 11 months.
My SIL was in a real bind when she was going through all that. She was told by every member of the family to give it up. But I saw how she felt, I knew she wanted it. She just needed a partner as most parents that work so hard do. So I told her. "I will be here for you. I will do all I can to be the other parent"!
The daddy thing didn't come up until my husband said"well when I brought a baby in the family I was expected to do most of the dirty diapers"? "Well that's a daddies job" I said. He smiled at me & said "well daddy have fun!!!! So it's stuck. The baby will know I'm his aunt but when he understands he can be told the story.
We basically have just arranged a long term babysitting/daycare plan. He has the nursery atour house. SIL will pay for most of his needs. I agreed to the baby shower gift of a years worth of formula. Or what he will need when she stops pumping. She's making all his food. Buyig clothes ,, diapers, bottles, all of his needs. I will provide a home, care, love, attention wile my SIL works. I love that he's finally here and healthy. He's sooo cute tooo!!!!!!