Hey there dolls! My name is Lauren and I am a soon to be SM, to a 5 year old SD. I am in love with both my soon to be DH and SD. I just want to have at least a little clarity on how to handle certain situations before we get married and become a family. For the most part we have it pretty easy. The BM moved to Los Angeles (about an hour and a half away) almost 2 years ago and she seeing my SD about 3 times a month. She also does not spend time with her when she does visit, she barely even calls to say hi to her unless my soon to be DH tells her to. Not even on Mothers Day not 1 Mothers Day EVER! It hurts me for my SD she is so perfect and sweet, I miss her when she goes to school!!! Still, in no way try to take her BM place or be her BM. I am Lauren I am her step momma and I love being that for her.
Ok so now that I got a little background story for ya'll here is my dilemma. About a month ago the BM's mom (who I get along with VERY well, and love) came to me and said she didn't know how to feel about my SD calling me mommy. I was really caught off gaurd. My SD, close to never calls me mommy or momma and when she does its because she wants something or I think it just slips out like a "Goodnight Momma" thing at night every once in a while. I have always been Lauren.. So apparently when she talks to her BM's mom about her "Mommy" or "Momma" she has been talking about me. Obviously this was awkward to hear her daughters daughter call some other woman Mom.. She said she didnt want to correct her or make her feel badly but she still felt bad for her daughter. I totally agree with her and in no way would I want to hurt anyones feelings, I also dont want to make a sweet innocent baby feel bad for calling me what she wants to. Shit, if she wanted to call my lambchop I wouldnt object.
Here is how I am feeling... Her calling me that makes me feel special and not uncomfortable until I think about how I would feel if my child called some other woman mom.. My SD is my only child and yes, I refer to her as my daughter. I want her to know that she is loved by me like she is my own. I had a SM growing up who made me feel VERY insignifficant and I would never do that to my SD..
SO PLEASE HELP ME! Should I feel badly and tell her no, or let it go? So far only the irregular "Momma look!" or "I love you Momma" as for now... I dont know how to handle this HELP ME