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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

No, I will not acknowledge you as husband and wife...

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
Because you're not!

Seriously, this has me annoyed. I just got married, legally married, and a couple we know (my brother's good friend and his gf) are going to have a ceremony and begin calling each other husband and wife and wearing rings, but are not going to get legally married.

I have no problem with couples who want to be together forever and not marry, but if you don't want to get married, then DON'T PRETEND TO BE. Why pretend to be married, if you don't WANT to be married???

It just seems disrespectful to me, because I actually am married, and others who aren't, can just play pretend and wear the rings and use the title, knowing it's a facade. They're going to go around just lying to people for the rest of their lives. I couldn't imagine introducing my DH as my DH and telling people I'm married if I knew I really wasn't.

If you want to pretend to be married, THEN GET MARRIED.

*To clarify, we are not in a common law state, and they aren't religious, so it isn't even for being married in God's eyes.*
Posted by Anonymous on Aug. 17, 2012 at 12:40 AM
Replies (41-50):
jj_bmom
by on Aug. 17, 2012 at 12:54 AM
It doesn't make sense to me either and I think it's dumb to play pretend. Put a ring on it and just be forever engaged if you want to be more then a boyfriend /girlfriend
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Aug. 17, 2012 at 12:54 AM
Awww, that's cute. Guess what though? Your family calling him your DH, doesn't make it so. He isn't your DH, no matter how badly you want him to be.

Quoting weirdkids:

My dh and I are not legally married because we can't be ATM we wear rings and my family even refers to him as my husband.


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
LiesLiesLies
by Platinum Member on Aug. 17, 2012 at 12:54 AM
Quite the opposite actually. My last 2 relationships ended because THEY wanted to get married and I said no. I just happen to not understand this odd obsession people have with how other people define their relationships.

In fact those are often the people who are in the most unstable relationships...perhaps they are just projecting? I don't know.




Quoting Anonymous:

Looks like this thread has a few women on it who can't get their man to marry them and now they're mad because you won't help them live in fantasyland where they can call their NSA relationship a marriage.

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Aug. 17, 2012 at 12:54 AM
1 mom liked this

 I think it's crazy that you find such trivial things disrespectful. Who the hell cares how someone elso lables their relationship...

Everyone knows that you are legally married. There is absolutely no confusion on that. That should make you plenty happy.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Aug. 17, 2012 at 12:54 AM
So they will be married in holy matrimony, just not legally? Do you know anything at all about marriage and history?
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Aug. 17, 2012 at 12:55 AM
In the eyes of the lord yes they are.

Quoting Anonymous:

The commitment may be real, but they are not married.




Quoting LucyHarper:

Marriage is not a piece of paper. I know plenty of people who are spiritually married and not legally and their marriage is just as real as yours. 


Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Aug. 17, 2012 at 12:55 AM
For the last time, we are NOT a common law state!


Quoting Anonymous:

In many states there is thing called common law!!!! I didn't want to get married but I was committed to my DH just like you are committed to your DH. I am his wife as he is my husband. Get over your self and stop being so judgemental. We did finally get married when I couldn't get health insurance and his employer started offering insurance.

Quoting Anonymous:

Because you're not!



Seriously, this has me annoyed. I just got married, legally married, and a couple we know (my brother's good friend and his gf) are going to have a ceremony and begin calling each other husband and wife and wearing rings, but are not going to get legally married.



I have no problem with couples who want to be together forever and not marry, but if you don't want to get married, then DON'T PRETEND TO BE. Why pretend to be married, if you don't WANT to be married???



It just seems disrespectful to me, because I actually am married, and others who aren't, can just play pretend and wear the rings and use the title, knowing it's a facade. They're going to go around just lying to people for the rest of their lives. I couldn't imagine introducing my DH as my DH and telling people I'm married if I knew I really wasn't.



If you want to pretend to be married, THEN GET MARRIED.



PinkWink
by on Aug. 17, 2012 at 12:56 AM

In Texas they can, it's called common law :)

mommamimzy2
by on Aug. 17, 2012 at 12:56 AM
1 mom liked this
Love me some l&o :)

Quoting slashteddy:

For some people, the legal recognition is the most important part. For other people, being married in front of their God(s) is the most important part. Some people can and/or want to do without either of those. It seems kind of suspicious to me, but I probably just watch too much Law and Order: SVU.

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Aug. 17, 2012 at 12:57 AM
But LEGALLY they are not. According to the law and on literal terms, they are not married. Marriage doesn't go by feelings of the heart to make it legal.


Quoting Anonymous:

In the eyes of the lord yes they are.



Quoting Anonymous:

The commitment may be real, but they are not married.






Quoting LucyHarper:

Marriage is not a piece of paper. I know plenty of people who are spiritually married and not legally and their marriage is just as real as yours. 



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