You had a M/C ....you're not a parent??

[Anonymous]

Do you think if someone has had miscarriages & have no living children, they should refer to themselves as a parent??

I have no problem with it... But in reality they are not. To me the word parent is a verb NOT a noun. Parenting involves action... It involves teaching, nurturing, guiding, disciplining, encouraging, loving, etc.... It is not possible to consider yourself a parent if you have no children.

* I respect & sympathize with anyone who has lost a child due to miscarriage. Just to make it clear I'm not talking about a woman who has given birth & then sadly something happened where the child passed away for whatever reason - I'm talking about a person who (for whatever reason) lost a child while pregnant. You will always be mommy to your 'angel baby' but your not a parent. Am I the only person who thinks this way??

[Anonymous]

I agree with you.  I MCd and do not consider myself a parent yet.

[GirlWithANikon]

No, I had multiple MC before my 2 children and I never considered myself a parent. I think though anything past like 17 I would call myself a mother and feel as though I mourn an actual child. Thats not to say I don't think MCs are painful.

[Anonymous]

If their one and only child died due to a miscarriage, they are a parent with a broken heart.  But also, a parent with no parenting experience to draw on.

[Miss-B]

Quoting meparty:

Let them call themselves whataver they want... its their way of dealing.

[Anonymous - Original Poster]

Quoting Anonymous:

I agree with you.  I MCd and do not consider myself a parent yet.

[Candymonster]

Quoting Anonymous:

It would never occur to me to think of myself as a parent if I had never either

1) adopted a living child

2) gave birth to a living child

[momof3jam]

Yikes. Touchy subject. I think after going through all of that, they have the right to call themselves whatever they want. I have fortunately been lucky and haven't had to go through one, but my BFF has and it is very hard. I think though, if they choose to call themselves parents, they're opening up a can of worms as far as questions that they may not be emotionally ready to answer. "Where is your baby?" "How old is he/she?" Innocent questions like that can cause painful emotions to arise if they went through it recently and haven't quite coped.

[Anonymous]

They are still parents, they just don't understand 'being a parent' the same way as those with kids do. I still consider them parents, they did create a child.

[ddemarco]

I suffered a m/c and never really considered myself a parent.  I considered my angel baby my baby/child, but I felt off thinking of myself as a mother, since I never held her in my arms.

[Anonymous - Original Poster]

Quoting Candymonster:

Quoting Anonymous:

It would never occur to me to think of myself as a parent if I had never either

1) adopted a living child

2) gave birth to a living child