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Yeah, I expect you to do it with a f'ing smile on your face!

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 My husband does one particular thing that irratates me to NO END.

I am a SAHM. He works, a lot. I in no way take for granted all that he does for our family, he works his butt off as a provider.

BUT, am I so friggen out of line to ask for HELP every now and then when he actually IS home? I make sure he gets atleast 8 hours of UNINTERRUPTED SLEEP(something I havent gotten in over 2 years). Does he APPRECIATE it at all? NO. He has NEVER gotten up for a feeding(mostly since I BF), but he has NEVER gotten up in the middle of sleep for the kids. Not that I've asked him to, but he should damn well APPRECIATE that I take on all of that burden and let HIM get all of HIS precious sleep.

What bugs me, is that EVEN THOUGH he gets HIS rest, and time to unwind after HIS job, if I ask him to do ANYTHING with the kids, its an "eye roll" or he huffs and puffs about it, or all of a sudden gets a crummy attitude, like as if he is a child and I am making him clean his room.

I'm with the kids 24/7, NO help from anyone, no daycare, no family help, no anything, so when he is home, and he should DAMN well help me out AND DO IT WITH A FRIGGEN SMILE!

proprolife.gif picture by piink-lem0nade


Happily married Mama to one angelbaby, a son born 10-19-10, and a daughter born 3-20-12

by on Aug. 22, 2012 at 8:19 AM
Replies (41-50):
by Ruby Member on Aug. 22, 2012 at 8:58 AM
5 moms liked this

I think it is baloney that because a man works, that when he comes in the door, he gets to set back, relax and do nothing. It took two to make the kids. He helps eat, makes laundry etc etc, asking or needing a little help is not asking him to come home and work his butt off.  It is asking him to contribute to the household.  My kids are expected to help so can my dh. Thankfully he does.  If a woman works outside the home, she doesn't come home, kick back and relax.  

Being Mom does not mean she has to do everything.  A loving husband and father will help out if he needs too. She shouldn't have to ask.  I mean if she is fixing supper and the kid needs help with homework, help the kid. If she is running a load of laundry and he sees the garbage can is full, take it out. It isn't labor, it is called being a family. Family helps family. Wife and Mom does not mean servant or slave.  A sahm, does more than just keep house and raise kids. There is more to it.  She isn't asking him to come home and clean the whole house or do a whole bunch of chores. She is just asking for some help, and for that help not to be treated like it is an imposition or hardship. I do not think it is too much to ask for a little help here and there.

by on Aug. 22, 2012 at 8:58 AM
1 mom liked this
Do you go to work and help him?
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by Silver Member on Aug. 22, 2012 at 9:00 AM
He's an ass. Just because your a sahm doesn't mean he can't help as their DAD. I wouldn't be with someone who is so inconsiderate.
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by *Angelicious* on Aug. 22, 2012 at 9:01 AM

Quoting Anonymous:

Somethings should be discussed before procreation and marriage.

This is one of them.
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by on Aug. 22, 2012 at 9:02 AM
1 mom liked this

i agree, my dh gets his precious sleep too. 8 hrs all day long while i get the kids ready, fed, played with, run errands etc. i don't mind it but he needs to be prepared to spend time with his kids for a few minutes while i unwind. if he gets 8 hrs to do so why can't i have five minutes. sometimes he gets mad bc i want a shower without my dd being there. one morning i forced him to take her and watch her while he showered like i am told to. now he takes her without complaint most of the time. no job should 24/7, and as for taking a nap that doesn't work in my house. my dd sleeps for 20 minutes at a time so there's no napping. yes i can relax for a minute but usually it's spent folding clothes without her assistance.

by Anonymous 16 on Aug. 22, 2012 at 9:02 AM
1 mom liked this
All moms have it hard working or stay at home but your husband should help when I stayed home with my kids my x said the same thing so one day I got up really early on a Saturday and left all day long with a note I will be back when I get back
by on Aug. 22, 2012 at 9:05 AM

 Tell him flat out, but don't be rude. Sometimes men don't do well with subtle hints. They like things spelled out for them. I used to think my hubs just didn't want to help when really he just didn't want to be in my way while I am working around the house. Make a list of things you desire from him and go over it so there is no misunderstanding.

by Anonymous 17 on Aug. 22, 2012 at 9:06 AM
Right now I'm a SAHM but as soon as I find work I will be working. Either way I do all the laundry, cooking on my days off (i usually end up working nights) and cleaning. Both are frustrating but I really couldn't take working more than him and doing all the housework.
by on Aug. 22, 2012 at 9:06 AM
While I wouldn't expect much help with house work, he should help with the kids...he's their daddy and part of that is nurturing and caring for them.
Just bc he works doesn't mean he's excused from that, you need to explain that to him or put the kids on mothers day out a few hours a week so you can get a break.
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by Anonymous 14 on Aug. 22, 2012 at 9:06 AM
1 mom liked this
As if working moms never somplain about work...gmab!

My "job" as a sahm ends when dh gets home. After that it's 50/50...except dinner. I cook and do the dishes. He gives ds baths, he plays with him, he gets him ready for bed, he takes the dog for walks. He comes home from work and it's family time.
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