I am in no means condoning what I did. What I did was dumb, stupid, unexplainable, and most of all...selfish.
I met a man a while ago, he had it all! And by all I mean, everything that a single mom at 21 years old wants. His own house, his own vehicle, a career!
We hit it off quick, I was into him, and he was into me. And the sex was absolutely fan fucking tastic! (the sex came months into our "relationship"
About a year after I met him, I received a message on facebook from a woman and all it said was "I just wanted you to know that I know" I kinda blew it off, until I realized she had his last name. I immediately called him demanding to know who she was. He then told me he was married. I knew he had children, and I knew he had been divorced before (i looked him up on the state case search site) But I never seen anything about his wife.
I sent her a message back, explaining to her that I had no idea who she was or what she was talking about.
She then told me that they had been married for 6 years, together 10.
I confronted him again about it later that night (while I was at his house mind you, where there was my stuff laying around, flat iron, clothes and such)
He said it was over between them, and that he wanted nothing to do with her and then told me "why would you be in my house if it werent true"
I beleived him thinking she was jsut a jealous soon to be ex wife. I am considerably younger than her, and him. Almost 15 years her junior and 19 his.
She explained that he has asked her for a divorce several times, but he never filed. She said that its simple, she loves him and she does not want to loose him. We talked only for a few mins.
She then left the conversation with "he is my husband, so you better just back off" I then reminded her, that I have 2 years invested into this and I am not going to leave that easily.
Later that evening, I called and spoke with him, he said to come down to work so him and I could talk.
We sat down, we talked. He explained to me that he loved me and not her. He had the actual paperwork for the divorce already, in his hand and filled out. He was going to file it when he got off work that next morning.
I told him, that I loved him, kissed his forehead and said, "you wont see me until the divorce is filed for" and i left.
I did not see him for 2 weeks, i refused to answer his phone calls, his texts, emails.
I got a message on fb one day from his "wife" saying "I am a homewrecking whore and blah blah blah, and im the reason he wants a divorce"
I politely reminded her that he had asked for divorce several times before he filed. She knew it was coming. It was just a matter of when.
A couple days later, i checked our case website again, and it was there.
I called him and he picked up and he said "i've missed you"
i asked him one question and I told him I wanted an honest answer. I asked him if he was sure this is what he wanted and he said yes.
But she continues to call and harrass him. Saying "their son needs this or that" or that he ruined her life.
Yeah sure, he cheated but, he didnt want to be with her, and she had already moved out.
she sends him texts constantly that are "you know i'll love you more than she ever will" or send him pictures of just her head where she looks "ok" in it and say you know miss this. he will text her back and tell her not to send him anything that its old and its over. then she just gets pissy back and says "oh whatever you can see your son this weekend"
Then the next day, she will text him, the only way you can see your son is if you come here, i'll wear that pink nighy i bought"
His ex wife (yes they are divorced now and have been for 3 years) is not a small lady. Not small at all. Shes actually on the "i'm a little bigger than a baby elephant" size.
She'll also leave him voicemails while he is sleeping of herself moaning and using a vibrator(u can hear the buzzing) and then her saying, very vulgar things.
Well, he went back to court, used it all against her. They charged her with sexual harrasment, phone harrasment, 2nd degree assault(she tried to attack him one evening at our house) and they gave my SO full custody of their son. He changed his number, and now she has to go through a case worker to see her son, She is not allowed to contact us via fb, cell phones, or anything else. She is not allowed in our neighborhood, or to contact to his parents.
She brought this on herself. I do feel bad, because I had no idea he was married in the beginning, and as soon as I found out that he was legally married, I did stop seeing him for a short period of time, until he filed for the divorce.