A Swingers party is like a normal party where you can go one step further if you wish, and know no one will be offended if you ask to dirty dance,or compliment your partners “assets”. Nine times out of ten, guests have gone through some type of screening, or orientation so there should be no surprises. Your first swinging experience should not be done on the spur of the moment, and both of you need to get your rules set and follow them. The best reason to swing is to enhance the relationship between the both of you, NOT to “fix” a relationship. If your relationship is not good, it will destroy it. Talk about what you want from swinging. Research it on the internet and take the plunge by calling a club, or go to an off premise "lifestyle” event at a bar takeover, and what not. Talk to couples there and see what they say about “the lifestyle”. Some couples join swinger websites to get started. Just remember, be aware, as with anything, there are those that are not what they seem.
Rules of Swinging:
The first and foremost rule is NO means, NO! Saying NO should be respected, whether if it’s on the dance floor, in the barroom, or in a party room, In a group room,
it’s a little more loose, but say it politely, but firm. Say it one more time if you have too. If they don’t respect your wishes after that, let the host know so the host can take action if needed. Follow this simple golden rule and you will have pleasant experience. Everyone has the right to refuse. If someone says, “No.” take it graciously and walk away. No amount of nagging or stalking will get them to change their mind. You do NOT want the reputation of the one that people warn others about.
Ladies tend to rule the situation at the parties, so guys, make sure your lady and other ladies feel secure and happy. If a lady feels uncomfortable, chances are you won’t have a good time, and you probably won’t get her to come back.
Be courteous. Treat others, like you want to treated. It will get you further in the long run.
It is best to talk to couples as couples. Talking will set everyone at ease. Let people know what you are into and looking for. If you are new to the lifestyle, let them know you just want to watch and enjoy the atmosphere. If you make the effort to talk to people, you will be fine.
Arrive as a couple and leave as a couple. It is rude and you probably won’t be invited back.
If you have a disagreement that can not be settled within a few minutes, it is best to call it a night and go home. Making a scene at the party, tends to get you not invited back.
Touch base with your partner through out the evening. Make sure both of you are comfortable and happy with what is going on around you and between you.
Cleanliness is a must. It’s a social situation so be aware of grooming and stuff. The host
usually has mouthwash and stuff to freshen up.
Dress to impress.
You are going out on a date, so to speak. Dirty jeans & shirts are a turn off. OR dress the theme of the party if there is one. It’s more festive if you can dress to the theme.
Do not over drink at a party. It kills the mood for you, your partner, as well as the other guests. You want to remember all the things you are going to see and do. If you have to drink to be there, the club is not the place for you. Your partner should respect that.
If there is a problem, tell the host, for example, opening doors, missing liquor, and not
taking, NO for an answer. They truly want to know so that they can correct the situation before it becomes a problem. Keeping problems to yourselves only contributes tension to the situation. Let the host know THAT evening, so they have a chance to talk to the person.
Don’t touch without permission! If you want to touch someone, kiss them or grab their butt, or whatever, you need to introduce yourself and ask permission first. You need to ask the person you want to touch. Not their spouse, their friend, or anyone else. And remember, just because you had permission one time, it does NOT mean you have permission another time.
Take time to talk to all sorts of couples. Even if you don’t hit it off with someone you want to be with, they may be the key to meeting people that you do.