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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

My DD's friend's mom is mad that I tooker her to church

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

 

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Question: Was I wrong to take this child to church?

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Yes

No


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Total Votes: 390

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My DD wanted to have a friend spend the night last night, they are 12. The mom has told me before that she doesn't approve of organized religion. I said that was fine for her to spend the night but to make sure the mom knew that we leave for church at 8 am and if she is not picked up by then, she will go with us. She lives 15 min in the other direction of the church so I wouldn't have time to drop her off. I mentioned that to the mom when she dropped her off as well. Well, 8 am rolled around and the mom didn't come, we called and her cell phone was off. So we left and her friend went with us to church. I left the mom a voicemail telling her we were going to church and we would be home by 2 pm since we go out to lunch with my parents after church. The mom came to pick her up at just after 2 and started yelling at me that how dare I take her DD to church against her wishes. I reminded her that I had said she had to be picked up by 8 or we would have to take her with her. She felt that I should have just dropped her off (making my entire family late, when I didn't even know whether she would be home or not and if she is not home, I am not leaving the 12 year old there). I feel like if it was that big of a deal for her, she would have  picked her up on time.

Also, the girl LOVED church and she wants to go with us now. I am hoping that perhaps this might get the family involved.

Posted by Anonymous on Sep. 2, 2012 at 3:06 PM
Replies (391-400):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 36 on Sep. 3, 2012 at 2:43 PM
If the child and parent knows I have plans at 8am and agree to let me keep my plans, I see no reason to not let her stay.
I dont care that she knows her well. Same would apply.
Quoting PranaPilot:

Well that's your choice, but I don't think it's a smart one. 12 year old's stay up most of the night for a sleep over. There is no way my dd is having a slumber party if we have to go somewhere at 8am. Also like I said before OP grew up with the mom she is talking about. She knows her pretty well. This whole thing is bullshit.

Quoting Anonymous:

Yes I would.



Quoting PranaPilot:

Well come on. Would you ever let a 12 year old girl spend the night if you had to leave for church at 8am especially if she wasn't coming with? She knows this mom pretty well, they grew up going to the same church, she's either usually late or she isn't. If she wasn't there would be concern if she is always late then OP knew full well that she'd be taking that child to church and it's exactly what she wanted to happen. I'm not saying the mom didn't have to pick up her kid on time, I'm saying they are both being jerks.

Quoting Anonymous:

Well, she obviously was quite inconsiderate. Your last comment just makes me chuckle. Sure, it was a big conspiracy.







Quoting PranaPilot:

Nowhere in the OP did she mention this mom was typically inconsiderate. OP knew the mom wasn't going to be there, in fact I think she was counting on it.

Quoting Anonymous:

Obviously the mom was just fine. She picked her daughter up, bitching. Nothing was wrong with her. She is a big girl. Why would op be concerned? Inconsiderate people are late all the time. The mom was probably just being lazy, laying in bed.
Quoting PranaPilot:

I don't know. People seem to be blowing right over it.

Quoting LucyMom08:

Why are people not getting that? The lack of concern and the last paragraph are quite telling...



Quoting PranaPilot:

I find late people to be arrogant and it bothers me too. The point is when someone says something is important to them, and then don't show most people would be concerned about that person. 

Quoting Godgaveme4:

 



Quoting PranaPilot:




Quoting LucyMom08:

I know...did OP know she wouldn't show up? *shrugs*

If it was me, and the other mom was concerned about church, I'd have been nice and left a bit earlier to take the girl home...or been late to church...




Quoting PranaPilot:



isn't it interesting that no one bothered to find out? No one was concerned when mom didn't show?



Quoting LucyMom08:

Why was the mom late?





ding ding ding we have a winner!



She knew that mom wasn't going to show up and she set her up. Who has a sleepover when they have to be somewhere at 8am first off? When someone you are expecting to show doesn't, the typical reaction is concern. I wouldn't have gone to church because I would have been concerned about the mom



 We do not change our plans to accomodate kids visiting.  If we have church then we attend church.  We have the same schedule each week.  And sometime we have commitments at church like working nursery or other stuff.  We cannot be late for that.



And we have sleep overs all the time.  I let the parents know what is going on and they decide if they will be able to work iwth it or not.  If they do not show up in time then a phone call is made and we take the kid with us where ever we have to go.  I find it rude when people are not on time for things and make others late because they are tardy.  It drives me nuts.






Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Benjamins-mama
by Platinum Member on Sep. 3, 2012 at 2:50 PM

you were both wrong.  

preplovesyou
by on Sep. 3, 2012 at 4:27 PM

You aren't wrong because she knew the deal beforehand.

shoucate
by on Sep. 3, 2012 at 5:20 PM
I think if the parent was that opposed, she would not have let the daughter spend the night knowing in advance what your plans were. She was being selfish thinking you would just hang around and wait. I wouldn't feel bad. You did everything to try and reach her.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous 41 on Sep. 3, 2012 at 9:34 PM
IMO you could have left a little bit earlier to take her home so you both were in the wrong
ilovemykids323
by Ruby Member on Sep. 3, 2012 at 9:36 PM

 I dont think you did anything wrong. the mom was told to pick her up by a certain time or she would have to go. if she didn't w ant her in the church sheshuld have been on time. SO thats her problem not yours.

Chrissy539
by on Sep. 3, 2012 at 9:43 PM

I'm not huge on organized religon either, but if it was that big of a deal that my child was kept away from it then i would have made sure to pick her up on time. you probably shouldn't have taken her since you knew that the mom was against it, but i don't see how you had any other choice. besides it's not like the child hated it or anything.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 42 on Sep. 3, 2012 at 9:46 PM
You knew how she felt and you still took her.

Shame shame
Anonymous
by Anonymous 42 on Sep. 3, 2012 at 9:46 PM
She could have stayed home...ahhh genius I know!

Quoting Chrissy539:

I'm not huge on organized religon either, but if it was that big of a deal that my child was kept away from it then i would have made sure to pick her up on time. you probably shouldn't have taken her since you knew that the mom was against it, but i don't see how you had any other choice. besides it's not like the child hated it or anything.

Yellowlily333
by Gold Member on Sep. 3, 2012 at 9:49 PM
1 mom liked this

 No, the Mom knew you would take her if she was not there. You told her several times, and tried calling her.You are fine.

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