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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

the things you thought you would never say before kids ETA

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
Ds- mom there is poop coming out of my butthole O.o
Me- thats what happens.. Lol
No you may not pinch my boob
Tampons are not toys!
Please dont try to ride the dog
No mommy dont have a.weiner and no you can not see what I have
Dont pull your brothers penis
The cat dont like toliet baths
The dog does not like to share food so STAY THE HELL OUT OF IT!!


Add your own :)

ETA- No we can not spray paint the cat lime green
The toliet is not optional you must pee IN it not on it.
We do not push grandma bc she is walking slow
Just bc you are breastfed doesnt mean the lady behind the counter needs to see my nipple when you are trying to pull my boob out if my shirt(dd 1yrs old)
Mamas make up is for me and not for you/your dolls/your toys/bed/walls
No you may not lock your sister outside
Posted by Anonymous on Sep. 16, 2012 at 9:06 PM
Replies (11-20):
starry_dreamer
by on Sep. 16, 2012 at 9:25 PM
1 mom liked this
Don't lick the cupboards
Don't climb your dresser
The plunger is not a toy
Don't climb in the dishwasher
(Hes 17 months and was walking at 8 months...)
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
PandTsmomjuly
by Florence on Sep. 16, 2012 at 9:25 PM

Don't stick your penis in *insert object, I've probably yelled at him for it*!

We don't eat babies!

Why did you stick that *insert orifice, they've probably stuck something in there*?

No, honey, we do not eat dog food.

Get your fork off the dog.

Oh man, I have a lot of hilarious stuff posted on FB, I'll have to dig some out, lol.


KayelynnsMama
by Gold Member on Sep. 16, 2012 at 9:25 PM
4 moms liked this

Just today "That better not be poop on your stomach."

MrsWhite101610
by Gold Member on Sep. 16, 2012 at 9:25 PM
This is funny.


Quoting MrsNewman:

The trash can is not a treasure chest. 



Posted on CafeMom Mobile
beeonit
by on Sep. 16, 2012 at 9:25 PM
STOP chewing your fingers/hair!
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
starry_dreamer
by on Sep. 16, 2012 at 9:26 PM
5 moms liked this
I got to know what caused a conversation like this lol



Quoting wilesmomma:

There is nothing wrong with anyone's vaginas!

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
PandTsmomjuly
by Florence on Sep. 16, 2012 at 9:27 PM
5 moms liked this

HAHA! My now 5yr old did this! I used to use the ones with wings until he took all my pads out.

We had stairs and I went up to find out why he was so quiet. As I climbed, I saw my pads stuck to the wall. I rounded the corner to yell at him and he was COVERED in them.

"Look mommy! I fownd AiwPWANES! ZROOOOOOOM!" (He was 2)

I literally laughed so hard I had to sit down and can no longer wear pads with wings, lol.

Quoting CBMMOM:

Never use my pads for a wall border around your room again.


kidlover2
by on Sep. 16, 2012 at 9:27 PM
1 mom liked this
At a nine yr old....Put the napkin down and stop eating it.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
lauraschatz
by on Sep. 16, 2012 at 9:28 PM
1 mom liked this
We do not chew our clothing. Please do not touch the dogs brown hole.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Sep. 16, 2012 at 9:29 PM

GET OFF YOUR SISTER'S HEAD!!

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