is anyone here

[Anonymous]

that is in a relationship/marriage because you have just given up? meaning.....you know deep down its not going to work but u keep it going for whatever reason? physical abuse, emotional abuse, drug abuse, cheating problems, etc dont even deter you from leaving your man? you are just like "fuck it, i'll deal with it". maybe its because of the kids...maybe its bc u dont want to be alone but doesnt it suck? as i type this i cry....im depressed and lonely....my man and other men deny they have problems and just blamne eveyrthing on you......they make you feel inferior and they have control of the relationship..its easy for me to leave but i dont know why i stay....anyone out there feel like this at all? of course i know im going to get the negative comments and people bashing this post....but i truely would love to talk to women who are in the same position as i am....i cant talk to my friends or family....i cant talk to him, he just twists shit and makes me miserable but i stay...i stay...idk why but i stay

[Anonymous - Original Poster]

thank you so very much

Quoting Maks1mommy:

I'm really sorry you feel this way. I hope you find happiness.

[Anonymous]

Why not....can't you set the group to private or something?

Quoting Anonymous:

i would if i could...but i cant so i wont

Quoting Anonymous:

You guys should start a group called "willing victims in abusive relationships"

[Anonymous - Original Poster]

i can but i cant post anonymously in it..i could make a group profile i suppose..but im guessing women on here wouldnt want to make it known what they are dealing with at home...u know...a lot of cut throat bitches on here would have a field day with it

Quoting Anonymous:

Why not....can't you set the group to private or something?

Quoting Anonymous:

i would if i could...but i cant so i wont

Quoting Anonymous:

You guys should start a group called "willing victims in abusive relationships"

[Anonymous]

I've tried telling my sister to get out of the marriage if he's unwilling to work at it. Of course I don't know everything that goes on in their relationship. So my only suggestion to her and to you is to get counseling on your own. You have to know that you're better than how he treats you. You can't let someone control you and your life like that. It's not easy to do on your own sometimes and that is why I suggest you talk to someone who has no ties to you or your family or to him. Start investing in yourself and show your husband you can live without him. Maybe then he'll wake up and realize he's being a manipulative person and that you deserve better.

Quoting Anonymous:

he is exactly like your sisters husband.....he agreed to counseling when i caught him cheating...but today he just said he doesnt need a doctor to tell him he is right and that im the one with the problem

Quoting Anonymous:

My sister is in a marriage like this, but they don't have any kids. And everything you wrote sounds just like her.

I hope that you find the strength to move on and maybe seek counseling for yourself and/or the marriage? (If your husband is anything like my sister's husband then he thinks counseling is a joke and he has nothing to fix)

[meparty]

When I feel like its over, I remember my vows.. I would never stay in an abusive relationship.

[Anonymous]

That's how I felt in my marriage. I just stayed put on a good show for his friends and our familys. I gave up and was miserable there. He is a control freak. That treated me like crap. Until my middle school sweet heart showed up and saw how my life was. He asked how he could help and was the only person who showed he cared. I left moved in with my grandparents while I got back on my feet. My middle school sweet heart is now my fiance' and I couldn't be happier!!!

[xomrs.chase]

I wouldnt tolerate it either

Quoting Anonymous:

thats the only abuse ive never experienced and im sure wouldnt put up with....

Quoting xomrs.chase:

My dh has anger issues with his sugar lows, but he is getting help. I stay because i love him, and want to get through it together.



I draw the line with physical abuse. If he ever hit me i would leave. No ifs ands or buts

[ShesALady]

((hugs)) I'm sorry. I've been there, but when he cheated I finally left. We had two kids together and I stayed for 5 years listening to his put downs and going out all night with friends, never helping with the kids. It was horrible and depressing. I finally found the strength to leave and I couldn't be happier with that choice. Don't give up on yourself and just let it happen. Leaving is the hardest part. Once you get past that initial step it slowly gets easier.

[Anonymous - Original Poster]

thats a great idea...thanks a lot i appreciate it

Quoting Anonymous:

I've tried telling my sister to get out of the marriage if he's unwilling to work at it. Of course I don't know everything that goes on in their relationship. So my only suggestion to her and to you is to get counseling on your own. You have to know that you're better than how he treats you. You can't let someone control you and your life like that. It's not easy to do on your own sometimes and that is why I suggest you talk to someone who has no ties to you or your family or to him. Start investing in yourself and show your husband you can live without him. Maybe then he'll wake up and realize he's being a manipulative person and that you deserve better.

Quoting Anonymous:

he is exactly like your sisters husband.....he agreed to counseling when i caught him cheating...but today he just said he doesnt need a doctor to tell him he is right and that im the one with the problem

Quoting Anonymous:

My sister is in a marriage like this, but they don't have any kids. And everything you wrote sounds just like her.

I hope that you find the strength to move on and maybe seek counseling for yourself and/or the marriage? (If your husband is anything like my sister's husband then he thinks counseling is a joke and he has nothing to fix)

[givenshl]

You should never let some one Control Your life, you should always be in Charge of You. Good Luck to you.