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My ex really asked me to let him stop paying child support UPDATE

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

Yesterday, when my ex picked up the kids (we have 2 together) he had them go to the car and asked to speak with me. He said that his wife got laid off 2 months ago and hasn't been able to find a new job. He said they have it very hard financially because now he is supporting him, her and her 2 kids on his own, the only income she now has is the child support from her ex. I said, "well sorry, that sucks but why are you telling me this". He said that he needs me let him off the hook for child support, he pays $967 a month for the 2 kids. I said "so let me get this straight, you want to get out of supporting YOUR CHILDREN so that you can support your wife and her kids, no, if you don't pay every dime you owe, I will file a failure to pay motion." Seriously, I couldn't believe that he would even ask that. He said if he has to keep paying child support, they will have to more and her kids will have to move schools, again that sucks but it's not my  problem.

My ex dropped the kids at home last night and said "since YOU won't let me stop paying my child support and we still have 5 months left on our lease, we are screwed." He said it won't help that much to have her kids go live with her ex because then she wouldn't get child support and would have to pay something (it wouldn't be a lot because she isn't working but it would be something) and they are still in the same place so it's not like the kids being gone would let them get a smaller place. I said "listen your wife and her kids aren't your legal responsibility, our kids are so they should be the FIRST people you support. If it's really that bad tell her to get a fast food job or something but our kids have 2 employed parents, they should have to go without because your wife lost her job.

Posted by Anonymous on Sep. 29, 2012 at 3:31 PM
Replies (311-320):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 39 on Oct. 1, 2012 at 5:10 PM
1 mom liked this
i 100% agree with what you are doing and your not greedy ignore the ass hates who say you are
OkieMommyOf6
by Bronze Member on Oct. 1, 2012 at 5:11 PM
1 mom liked this

my mil ex dh used to try to lower the child support and every time she said thats fine with me but we need to go through the court system. and every time the judge would look at her ex dh like he was stupid and raise it. my mil is getting 2,000 a month on child support for 3 kids. now he is claiming that the child support and his kids are coming between him and his girlfriend. he claims he shouldnt have to pay child support since he wants nothing to do with the oldest now. wont be long before he wants nothing to do with the other two.

Quoting Anonymous:

 

Quoting OkieMommyOf6:

lol i think i would have told him to take it court and see what the judge thought about it.

It would be funny if he did because the judge wouldn't be able to lower it even if he wanted to, his income hasn't gone down. Actually, since he has gotten at least one raise since the last review, it would probably go up.


yaya89
by Bronze Member on Oct. 1, 2012 at 5:13 PM
I'm the same my ex does not pay child support. We have an agreement that when ever I need him to help pay something for the kids(2) I will let him know. Either way when he takes them he always ends up buying stuff for them. That is every weekend.


Quoting 3earthangels:

I'll be the oddball, I would of helped him out. My ex and I both understand and agree that we both need to be stable physically, financially, mentally, and emotionally to best care for our children and will help each ither as best we can so we both can be great parents. Being unable to afford housing, bills, food...etc is an instability I could help him with to help my kids have a great life. *shrug* whatever floats your boat

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
jamiegraham
by Silver Member on Oct. 1, 2012 at 5:17 PM

I totally agree with you!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 38 on Oct. 1, 2012 at 6:03 PM
Quoting Anonymous:



.
I know this however you are the cp YOU have the final say.You can go as low as you want to.
I also could have gotten more cs from my ex, but I wanted to be fair.I get just a little more than you and I have four.My choice.
conweis
by Platinum Member on Oct. 1, 2012 at 6:09 PM
Maybe you could pay the ex wife to do odd jobs.
Childcare?
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous 16 on Oct. 1, 2012 at 7:41 PM
This post is one big cluster fuck!!
Anonymous
by Anonymous 40 on Oct. 1, 2012 at 7:45 PM
Sounds to me like his wife his helping him support your kids and now that she lost her job he can't. I hate people like you. Brings the ugly out in me. Makes me wish negative things apon your kids. ugh. I hate myself..
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Sarah_Moore
by Gold Member on Oct. 1, 2012 at 8:06 PM
I know, its crazy. If you are going to fight nonstop why be in that kind of dysfunctional relationship. People really did expect us to fight and not last because on our wedding day we knew each other for only 3 months and 4 days. But we just knew so why wait? Lol.

Quoting RaynesMommy07:

Idk why ppl just expect others to fight like they do. DF and I have been together 9 years, we've MAYBE had two "fights", if you call it that. More like disagreements that were solved within an hour.



Quoting Sarah_Moore:

Me too, lol. People expected us to fight because of how fast we got married. We met April 5 2011 and got married July 9 2011. It was quick but i told them that when you meet someone and you instantly know, there's something there and you have no doubt in your mind that they are the one then that's it. When you know, you know.





Quoting Anonymous:

Surprise! There are couples who actually get along. Lol. Everyone doesn't have to fight. I'm glad you guys found what works for you both.







Quoting Sarah_Moore:

Its fine, he makes me laugh with it. Lol. He's a sweetheart, and we tease each other on that stuff all the time. People are always in shock when we tell them we haven't even had our first fight. They're like OMG, lol. Usually after over a year ppl have had at least one fight.









Quoting Anonymous:

LOL! Tell the hubby to lay off! It'll pass. Mine did...sort of.











Quoting Sarah_Moore:

I can't remember what the other part was that actually was relevant to the topic. I was gonna put it then i had to go to town and left it out on accident now i don't even kbow what i was gonna say, lol. My hubby has ptsd so part of this for him is really bad memory loss, he teases me all the time that right now my memory is worse than his.













Quoting Anonymous:

Don't feel bad. When I was pregnant I couldn't remember anything? LOL! I thought I was losing it, until the doctor told me it was normal.















Quoting Sarah_Moore:

Yes, apparently pregnancy brain doesn't like me because I'm misspelling everything these days. So much for winning the county spelling bee when i was 12, huh? Lol. Can't tell it now.

















Quoting Anonymous:

Donor??



















Quoting Sarah_Moore:

A donar- man who has a child whom he has completely abandoned. Sperm donar.





















Its not really i guess. I forgot to put on the rest, something happened where i had to hop off here real fast.






















Quoting Anonymous:

What's a donar? And how is this relevant to the topic?
























Quoting Sarah_Moore:

My ds's donar asked if he could start paying it again after not paying it for years and abandoning ds for almost 4 years. Nope, told him i didn't want his money. Plus ds is almost 6 and wants nothing to do with his donar.

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RaynesMommy07
by Ruby Member on Oct. 1, 2012 at 8:10 PM
I really couldn't deal with constant arguing. No way I could stay.

Quoting Sarah_Moore:

I know, its crazy. If you are going to fight nonstop why be in that kind of dysfunctional relationship. People really did expect us to fight and not last because on our wedding day we knew each other for only 3 months and 4 days. But we just knew so why wait? Lol.



Quoting RaynesMommy07:

Idk why ppl just expect others to fight like they do. DF and I have been together 9 years, we've MAYBE had two "fights", if you call it that. More like disagreements that were solved within an hour.





Quoting Sarah_Moore:

Me too, lol. People expected us to fight because of how fast we got married. We met April 5 2011 and got married July 9 2011. It was quick but i told them that when you meet someone and you instantly know, there's something there and you have no doubt in your mind that they are the one then that's it. When you know, you know.







Quoting Anonymous:

Surprise! There are couples who actually get along. Lol. Everyone doesn't have to fight. I'm glad you guys found what works for you both.









Quoting Sarah_Moore:

Its fine, he makes me laugh with it. Lol. He's a sweetheart, and we tease each other on that stuff all the time. People are always in shock when we tell them we haven't even had our first fight. They're like OMG, lol. Usually after over a year ppl have had at least one fight.











Quoting Anonymous:

LOL! Tell the hubby to lay off! It'll pass. Mine did...sort of.













Quoting Sarah_Moore:

I can't remember what the other part was that actually was relevant to the topic. I was gonna put it then i had to go to town and left it out on accident now i don't even kbow what i was gonna say, lol. My hubby has ptsd so part of this for him is really bad memory loss, he teases me all the time that right now my memory is worse than his.















Quoting Anonymous:

Don't feel bad. When I was pregnant I couldn't remember anything? LOL! I thought I was losing it, until the doctor told me it was normal.

















Quoting Sarah_Moore:

Yes, apparently pregnancy brain doesn't like me because I'm misspelling everything these days. So much for winning the county spelling bee when i was 12, huh? Lol. Can't tell it now.



















Quoting Anonymous:

Donor??





















Quoting Sarah_Moore:

A donar- man who has a child whom he has completely abandoned. Sperm donar.























Its not really i guess. I forgot to put on the rest, something happened where i had to hop off here real fast.
























Quoting Anonymous:

What's a donar? And how is this relevant to the topic?


























Quoting Sarah_Moore:

My ds's donar asked if he could start paying it again after not paying it for years and abandoning ds for almost 4 years. Nope, told him i didn't want his money. Plus ds is almost 6 and wants nothing to do with his donar.

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