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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

would you judge this woman?

lets say you know a woman, she used to have problem with drugs, after staying clean for a year, her bf beats her up and leaves her (because she doesn't approve of him drinking) alone with 2 kids, she spirals into depression, and ends up leaving her kids with her mom and takes off and relapses.

2 months into her relapse, she realises she is pregnant, by her druggie bf. 

scared to go home, ashamed of what she has done, she quits drugs on her own, tells her mom everything is ok, and stays with the loser bf.

then one night, he tries to kill her and her unborn child.

she manages to escape, and ends up couch surfing, because there is no family near enough to help her. he promises to change and begs her forgivness, sick of couch surfing, she goes back.

a month later, he tries to kill her again. 

this time,she calls the police and puts him in jail, packs her bags, and goes home to her mothers, a 3 day drive away. 

her life is in flux, she is a recovering addict (she quit when she found out about the baby) and has 2 children already, 1 whom her mother has raised since she was 15, and another who she placed with her mom while she relapsed. 

determined to stay clean and be a good mom, she makes a hard choice, to learn to be a mother to the 2 children she already has, and focus on recovery, and in order to do that, she decides that she needs to put the child she is carrying up for adoption, just in case she cannot stay clean.

she finds the perfect family, a nice young couple, and the adoption process begins. 

she is scared the stress of a new baby along with learning to be a mother again will be too much for her, she is scared of relapsing. she is scared of putting her kids through hell. again. so she gives her little baby girl up, and keeps working on herself. 

she meets a really nice farm boy, he loves her despite her faults, they meet when she is 7 months preg with the baby she is giving up.

he stands by her, and is there for her and loves her. he treats her children as her own, and is supportive of her decision regarding adoption.

5 years later, they are still together, she is still clean, and is a good wife and mother. 

she has tried her best to make amends for the damage her addiction has caused. 

her oldest still lives with her mother, (although she tried to have him with her, he just wasn't happy, and they had a hard time bonding, ) but she got herself in check in time to save her relationship with the younger one.

4 years after first meeting her farm boy, they have a baby:) and then they get married:) and are now expecting another child. 

do you judge her and begrudge her this child because of her past? (she has 6 years clean now)


Posted by Anonymous on Oct. 3, 2012 at 2:01 PM
Replies (281-290):
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Oct. 3, 2012 at 11:51 PM

wow, what exactly do you think my current homelife is like?! 

Quoting morrigan914:

Sorry, if hearing the truth bothers you. You abandoned your son once and you are still doing it. Personally, I think you're doing him a favor, the farther away from you he gets, the better off he'll be.

Quoting Anonymous:

you need to calm the fuck down and stop projecting your childhood on me. 

Quoting morrigan914:

Jumping right in...Listen you fucking cuntwad, you are always doing "all you can" but that's bullshit. My mom left me at the ripe old age of 4 with a man that not only beat the shit out of me, he raped me every chance he got, which was a lot. I probably saw my mom 6 times in my life until I was about 24. And I still have a relationship with her, she still does everything she can to be a part of my life and I forgave her. She didn't say, "oh well, you're not a cute little baby anymore so I DGAF about you" Everything is always about YOU, so here's some yous for you. YOU create drama. YOU try to justify your bullshit excuse for a life so much YOU actually believe them. YOU throw innocents under the bus out of spite, malice and jealousy. YOU are a lair, fake and fraud and I'm sure your 14 y/o son sees right through your bullshit and you can't stand the reminder of your miserable life, so you tossed him aside like he was garbage. YOU are a waste of flesh, end if story.



Quoting Anonymous:

listen dumb ass. i have done all i can do, and i am STILL doing all i can do to repair and maintain my relationship with my son. i KNEW i was a bad mom and not yet ready for yet another child, which is why i gave my dd up for adoption, THAT IS taking responsability for my actions. 

and i just don;t understand what it is you think i should that i am not already doing?! my god.

you are insane! should i go take back the child i gave up? take my son back from the home he is happy in and force him to live with me and love me or what? you're nuts! i am honestly doing all i can do while maintaining a job, and taking care of my other children, who ALSO need me. 

jesus fucking christ. 


Quoting Aislin:

So your behavior and choices have not had any impact on your children? Your son is the very proof that isn't true. The daughter you gave up for adoption is even more proof. You need to take responsibility for all of that. 

You have stated over and over that you gave up on healing the bond that you broke with your son. It doesn't matter how old he is. You don't just give up on healing your relationship with your child ever. You go above and beyond for your kids. You move heaven and earth for them. You don't make excuses for why you can never have a bond. You do anything you have to so that your child can trust you again. You make the choice to live 2 hours from him so that isn't an excuse either. All these excuses are really just your choices. Take responsibility and stop trying to act like a victim. You are not. Your son is.




Anonymous
by Anonymous on Oct. 3, 2012 at 11:52 PM
2 moms liked this
You left out threatening a co-worker with a knife a few months ago
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Oct. 3, 2012 at 11:53 PM

i didn;t threaten her. i said i was leaving the kitchen so i wouldn;t stab her with one the knives that were laying around. theres a difference.

trust me, i am not the only who has been driven to the point of wanting to kill that broad. 

Quoting Anonymous:

You left out threatening a co-worker with a knife a few months ago


NatesMyBoy
by Gold Member on Oct. 3, 2012 at 11:54 PM
Uh oh. His feet stink? Ya best move out.

Quoting Anonymous:

lmao...you think so? ya he's pretty cute in a rough and tough redneck sorta way. (but his feet stink!)

Quoting gwebkeijmmm:

And he's hot!



Quoting Anonymous:

me too. my dh is irreplaceable. i tried to act like i had it all together and was going to be fine, but the truth is, i need him, and he needs me. together we can get through whatever life throws at us.

Quoting Anonymous:

I'm glad you worked it out.





Quoting Anonymous:

i had an issue with my inlaws attacking me when i returned from my sisters brain surgery, they said horrible things, and i was willing to divorce my dh instead of making him choose between me and his family. however, he chose us.

Quoting Anonymous:

Weren't you saying you were getting a divorce here recently?




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Anonymous
by Anonymous on Oct. 3, 2012 at 11:54 PM
2 moms liked this
Yay mama! I am so proud of you! Good job! I'm sorry to hear about your son, I pray one day he gets sober.

Quoting tgirl715:

I am Tammy and yes I struggled for a long time with alcoholism and I fell off the wagon TWICE not every other week. I never have used with my son ever he is a full blown heroin addict and people that are my friends know how I have pleaded to get him help. You are once again saying horrible things about me Corlene after sending me an apology for the nasty things you said. I never said a mean thing about you ever until you threw me under the bus. How dare you throw these lies and I mean lies to the point of slander about me. I have been sober since June 28 at 2:36 am and I am pretty damn proud of myself.

I have tried to stay out of this one just like the other post where you bashed me but enough is enough you don't apologize to someone for the awful cruel things you said and then do it again. I believe you called me "white trash" because I have a drinking problem yet you are offended when people say things to you. I never did a damn thing to you I was supportive and you screwed me and now once again you screwed me again!!

Quoting kjfamily:

Who is Tammy?


NatesMyBoy
by Gold Member on Oct. 3, 2012 at 11:55 PM
How old are you?

Quoting Anonymous:

there are women on here who think that because of my past, i should never be allowed to have children, or be happy, even though my life is nothing  like it was then, and i have done all i can to repair the damage i did as a teen.

Quoting kryptomom:

Define judge?


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Aislin
by Platinum Member on Oct. 3, 2012 at 11:55 PM

Well name calling is sure to change my mind about you. What you are not getting is that even if adoption was the very best choice at the time it still has consequences to the child. That is what yu take no responsibility for. You pt yourself in a situation where abandoning your  children was best. You did that, no one else. Those were your choices dumb ass.

Hell no you shouldn't yet again  rip that boy from his home. I think he has been through enough. But let me ask, why did you choose to run away at 12? Why did you have such a shitty life being raised by the woman you have now entrusted with your son? 

When you say things like "I have done all I can" and "nothing I do will ever make it up to him" it means you are not doing everything you can. You have given up on mending the relationship and have decided what you have now is good enough. If that is your choice then fine but own it instead of making it sound like you are a victim of circumstance. You caused it all with your bad choices.

Quoting Anonymous:

listen dumb ass. i have done all i can do, and i am STILL doing all i can do to repair and maintain my relationship with my son. i KNEW i was a bad mom and not yet ready for yet another child, which is why i gave my dd up for adoption, THAT IS taking responsability for my actions. 

and i just don;t understand what it is you think i should that i am not already doing?! my god.

you are insane! should i go take back the child i gave up? take my son back from the home he is happy in and force him to live with me and love me or what? you're nuts! i am honestly doing all i can do while maintaining a job, and taking care of my other children, who ALSO need me. 

jesus fucking christ. 


Quoting Aislin:

So your behavior and choices have not had any impact on your children? Your son is the very proof that isn't true. The daughter you gave up for adoption is even more proof. You need to take responsibility for all of that. 

You have stated over and over that you gave up on healing the bond that you broke with your son. It doesn't matter how old he is. You don't just give up on healing your relationship with your child ever. You go above and beyond for your kids. You move heaven and earth for them. You don't make excuses for why you can never have a bond. You do anything you have to so that your child can trust you again. You make the choice to live 2 hours from him so that isn't an excuse either. All these excuses are really just your choices. Take responsibility and stop trying to act like a victim. You are not. Your son is.



Anonymous
by Anonymous on Oct. 3, 2012 at 11:55 PM
Someone find her knife threatening post. Liar
DestinyHLewis
by Silver Member on Oct. 3, 2012 at 11:57 PM
No. If this,story is true she must have busted her ass to stay clean and become a decent person, wife and mom. I would never call her a victim, I would call her a survivor. Therein lies the difference.
NatesMyBoy
by Gold Member on Oct. 3, 2012 at 11:58 PM
Seriously? You need to quit posting your life's story if you are going to get mad when people connect the dots ( or trail of tears) and come to conclusions. If you did not always post so much info... People on here would not know who you are and you could go on your merry way.

Quoting Anonymous:

you know what, lol, you're a pretty miserable person, and nothing you can say can make me feel bad about myself. i have done what i needed to do, i have made amends, and i am STILL making amends. 

i can garun-fucking-tee you that my family loves me, and accepts me, and would tell you to go fuck your miserable self :) 

like i said, you need therapy. obviously you have some unresolved issues 

Quoting Anonymous:

What I said is logical, but you are too concerned with yourself and your own feelings to see that. I'm sure deep down your family and children would agree with me. Have a nice day :)



Quoting Anonymous:

who are you to try to get so personal about my life? one which, btw, you know nothing about! (except what has been said on here)  and luckily, my family and my children, yes, even the one living with my mom, love and accept me.  i don't know who you are, but you sound very bitter and angry, and whatever happened to you is not my fault. 

i suggest you get some counselling.

Quoting Anonymous:

She was the toxic one. She has screwed many people over in her process of sobriety and it is not their job to forgive time and time again because she finally became sober. That doesn't mean she can't have a new future, but her family and children she hurt in the past do not need to accept her anymore. Drugs are not an accuse to treat people like shit. It is still selfish choices no matter how addicted. I know this from experience.





Quoting Anonymous:

she is getting her tubes tied. as soon as her little bundle of joy arrives:) and i am sure she wouldn't want anything to do with you either, she does her best to keep the toxic people out of her life these days :)

Quoting Anonymous:

 I wouldn't have anything to do with a person like that.  That's for sure.  She needs to get her tubes tied. 




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