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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

might be a messed up question **eta

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
So I have a 4 y/o DD and one on the way. I'm a planned c section so I told Dh that god forbid something happen to me during my c section I want to do a power of attorney paper so he makes any and all decisions. I mean I know its a routine c section but stuff happens you don't plan for... so I was telling my cousin this and she said what if something happens and a decision needs to be made whether to save you or the baby (only one of us can survive this hypothetical) so ladies which would you want. Save you or the baby?

*eta since everyone is saying baby I wanted to ask (I swear not judging just interested) knowing that you have other children that are still young do you feel uncomfortable at all knowing you're leaving that child/Ren motherless?
Posted by Anonymous on Oct. 3, 2012 at 8:03 PM
Replies (51-60):
Lena-Loo
by on Oct. 3, 2012 at 8:45 PM
You! Your 4yo baby needs you too. What would your dh do ALONE with a 4yo AND a new born. Dh and i had this discussion he voted for me hands down.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous 13 on Oct. 3, 2012 at 8:53 PM
1 mom liked this
My husband would save me and not the baby. It would break my heart but it would be the right choice, I have two young children at home who need me. I'm probably going to be called all sorts of selfish and horrible now but my family needs me very much.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 14 on Oct. 3, 2012 at 8:54 PM
The mother. How sad for the other kids (if you have them).
Anonymous
by Anonymous 15 on Oct. 3, 2012 at 9:11 PM

The doctor sort of made this decision for us.  I was in for "observation" when doctor said emergency C-section in 25 mins whether DH can make it or not.  It was to save my life, and we just needed to hope for the best for DD who would arrive 2 months early.  So he was clearly chosing my life-as he should as my doctor.  NICU folks were in the room, of course, but he was running the show and merely handed DD to the NICU doctor the minute he pulled her out.

I KNOW DH would have supported the decision because DH had already broken down (privately--I found out weeks later) over how he was going to tell our son that I had died!!!  His theory was that it was him and me until DS (adopted) and that we had accepted, after many early term miscarriages, that our family was the 3 of us.   Then, surprise!  pregnant at 43.  And it kills me?  I'm not saying he resented the baby, but the few days before her birth he was a bit angry at God--we accepted our lot in life and now you send us this curveball that leaves DH and DS without me?  And it wasn't a save me so we could have another baby situation--clearly at 44 and with this behind me (severe preeclampsia) I wasn't ever having another baby.  We had never discussed this.  I had no will or medical power of attorney.  It really wasn't smart on my part.

DD was 3 lbs but did make it!!  5 months later DH announced he had booked a vascectomy.

AF2011
by Ruby Member on Oct. 3, 2012 at 9:12 PM
My baby.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
ColtsFan1912
by FriendoftheFoot on Oct. 3, 2012 at 9:13 PM

the baby

militarywife09
by on Oct. 3, 2012 at 9:14 PM
Me. I have two babies here and a husband who needs me.
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artio.sd
by on Oct. 3, 2012 at 9:15 PM
Me, selfish as they may sound. My sons father died when he was two. I do have a guardian set up in case the worse should happen and I know my SO would do right by him, but I'm his mother. He needs me here, not in the Summerlands.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 3, 2012 at 9:15 PM
Quoting Anonymous:

The doctor sort of made this decision for us.  I was in for "observation" when doctor said emergency C-section in 25 mins whether DH can make it or not.  It was to save my life, and we just needed to hope for the best for DD who would arrive 2 months early.  So he was clearly chosing my life-as he should as my doctor.  NICU folks were in the room, of course, but he was running the show and merely handed DD to the NICU doctor the minute he pulled her out.


I KNOW DH would have supported the decision because DH had already broken down (privately--I found out weeks later) over how he was going to tell our son that I had died!!!  His theory was that it was him and me until DS (adopted) and that we had accepted, after many early term miscarriages, that our family was the 3 of us.   Then, surprise!  pregnant at 43.  And it kills me?  I'm not saying he resented the baby, but the few days before her birth he was a bit angry at God--we accepted our lot in life and now you send us this curveball that leaves DH and DS without me?  And it wasn't a save me so we could have another baby situation--clearly at 44 and with this behind me (severe preeclampsia) I wasn't ever having another baby.  We had never discussed this.  I had no will or medical power of attorney.  It really wasn't smart on my part.


DD was 3 lbs but did make it!!  5 months later DH announced he had booked a vascectomy.




So glad everything worked out perfectly for you!!
MummiMayI
by Bronze Member on Oct. 3, 2012 at 9:18 PM

Honestly, save me. I have 3 other children that I wouldn't want to leave motherless so young.

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