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best divorce letter ever, stolen from facebook

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 33 Replies
7 moms liked this

Dear Wife, I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you forever. I’ve been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been hell. ... Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today & that was the last straw. Last week, you came home & didn’t even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers. You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don’t tell me you love me anymore; you don’t want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife. Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me anymore; whatever the case, I’m gone.

Your EX-Husband

P.S. don’t try to find me. Your SISTER & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!

Dear Ex-Husband Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It’s true you & I have been married for 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what you’ve been. I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping Too bad that doesn’t work. I DID notice when you got a hair cut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was ‘You look just like a girl!’ Since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can’t say something nice, I didn’t comment. And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 years ago. About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, & I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning. After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could work it out. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica But when I got home you were gone.. Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won’t get a dime from me. So take care.

Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free!

P.S. I don’t know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born Carl. I hope that’s not a problem.
Posted by Anonymous on Oct. 4, 2012 at 3:00 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Krystle21
by Silver Member on Oct. 4, 2012 at 3:02 PM
Wow
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
3_girls_86
by Ruby Member on Oct. 4, 2012 at 3:02 PM
1 mom liked this
I've read that one before..funny!!
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
b.futlz
by on Oct. 4, 2012 at 3:03 PM
Lol nice
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Hannahluvsdogs
by Ruby Member on Oct. 4, 2012 at 3:04 PM

Hahaha

tinkerspell
by Silver Member on Oct. 4, 2012 at 3:04 PM


Quoting 3_girls_86:

I've read that one before..funny!!
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
GreenEyePixie
by Platinum Member on Oct. 4, 2012 at 3:05 PM
rofl
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AnjalisMommy07
by on Oct. 4, 2012 at 3:05 PM
I read it last night.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
beerabitch69
by on Oct. 4, 2012 at 3:05 PM
Hahahah.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
BekahBrownEyes
by NoLies on Oct. 4, 2012 at 3:06 PM
Hahaha
Sunshine257
by on Oct. 4, 2012 at 3:06 PM
Lol I have seen this before
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