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The couple who was going to adopt my baby said they are going to sue me, can they???

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

Hopefully, I will be able to talk to the adoption agency tomorrow but I was just wondering if anyone knows about this.

What happened was I decided when I found out that I was pregnant, that I was going to put my baby up for adoption. I am 18 and was concerned about my ability to care for the baby on my own. I went to the agency and I picked out a few couples, interviewed them and ended up choosing a couple. This was when I was 12 weeks along. I am now 30 weeks and have been thinking for the past few weeks that I really wanted to keep my baby by Thursday, I just knew I was going to.  I called them up and told them that I was sorry but I changed my mine. Yesterday, the woman called me and said that I have no moral right to this baby anymore because it was already her baby. She said that they are going to sue me for the cost of all the baby stuff they bought and they want me to repay them for everything they bought me (she took me shopping for maternity close, at her insistence, I was fine wearing stretch pants and maternity shirts my sister gave me.) I know that I can keep my baby, I am going back to school and I have a good job as a live in nanny (the couple is from my church, knew of my situation and offered me the job and said if I keep the baby I could have the baby with me while I am there as a live in nanny). I am just really worried because  she said they have spent thousands on baby stuff and there is no way I could pay them back if a judge ordered me too.

Posted by Anonymous on Oct. 7, 2012 at 2:13 PM
Replies (1021-1030):
EvilQueenMommy
by Gold Member on Oct. 8, 2012 at 9:03 PM

You really think suing this woman will make the couple feel better?

Quoting harehelper:

I'm sure that will make them feel much better.

Quoting EvilQueenMommy:


You can't buy a baby, so she owes them nothing
Quoting harehelper:

Yeah, she did scam them. She promised them a baby, they got their hearts set for something they had been dreaming of for heaven only knows how long, and then she ripped their hearts out. If they had been buying a car from her and they paid for it and did not get it, she would owe them the money back. A baby is far more important and emotionaly invested than a car.

Sorry OP, but if you have to pay them back $10 at a time for the next ten years, you owe them that money back, since you can't or won't give them what they really wanted.

Quoting Amybelle:

IDK but you have to understand their feels....They were excited about "their" new baby, Spent a lot of money....& you change your mind. I'm sure they are heartbroken & feel you scammed them.  JMO but You should return any of the Baby items they bought for the child. (if you weren't meaning to scam them you should have no problem doing that)





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 "I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it."- Evelyn Beatrice Hall


Ollysmama08
by Member on Oct. 8, 2012 at 9:06 PM

check with the agency but in the mean time just give them the stuff they bought you make. Let them deal with the whole returning process, that may sound nasty but things like this happen all the time, i highly doubt they can sue you. They WILLINGLY bought you things.

GingerNeeSmith
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 9:06 PM

you backed out & you have every right,but yeah you should pay them back.

im_not_trollin
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 9:09 PM

 They can't sue you. When you are working with an agency they are very up front about the fact that an expectant mother can change her mind at any time before turning over the baby and in some states for a certain number of days after. She is just angry and trying to scare you into going through with it. There is absolutely nothing she can do.

im_not_trollin
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 9:13 PM
1 mom liked this

 You also can't squeeze blood from a turnip so suing this women, knowing she has nothing, is in reality only going to hurt the child if for some insane reason she would be ordered to pay back whatever. But, as I said in my other reply, they have absolutely no legal standing. When you go into an adoption, especially with an agency, they are very upfront about the fact that the mother can change her mind at anytime and they are in no way required to give ''gifts'' at any time or purchase anything until the adoption is final on the chance that it doesn't go through.

Quoting EvilQueenMommy:

You really think suing this woman will make the couple feel better?

Quoting harehelper:

I'm sure that will make them feel much better.

Quoting EvilQueenMommy:


You can't buy a baby, so she owes them nothing
Quoting harehelper:

Yeah, she did scam them. She promised them a baby, they got their hearts set for something they had been dreaming of for heaven only knows how long, and then she ripped their hearts out. If they had been buying a car from her and they paid for it and did not get it, she would owe them the money back. A baby is far more important and emotionaly invested than a car.

Sorry OP, but if you have to pay them back $10 at a time for the next ten years, you owe them that money back, since you can't or won't give them what they really wanted.

Quoting Amybelle:

IDK but you have to understand their feels....They were excited about "their" new baby, Spent a lot of money....& you change your mind. I'm sure they are heartbroken & feel you scammed them.  JMO but You should return any of the Baby items they bought for the child. (if you weren't meaning to scam them you should have no problem doing that)





 

Colleen86
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 9:19 PM

so ask for receipts and pay them back for whaetever they paid for. It is only fair/

xixCandyxix
by Platinum Member on Oct. 8, 2012 at 9:20 PM
Bump
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous 121 on Oct. 8, 2012 at 9:24 PM
They are mourning. They will stay on the list for another baby, but you 'killed' this one for them. This is why I am adopting over seas.
.LoVeMyBuG.
by Bronze Member on Oct. 8, 2012 at 9:29 PM
Your doing the right thing in my opinion. If they follow through and sue, I doubt they will win. Stay strong, good luck and I can assure you that you won't regret keeping your baby. I'm sure its got to be hard on them too, maybe send them a card and explain that your sorry but you just can't follow through. If they have any decency at all they will drop it and move on, they can use all they bought for a future baby. Good luck
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous 89 on Oct. 8, 2012 at 9:36 PM
That's sad.
I will never understand why women like that and like op, do this.
It's heartbreaking.
You're heartless, op.

Quoting Anonymous:

I agree. I had a failed adoption. I raised her for weeks and they took her back. So yeah sorry, but now i'm more for adoptive parents rights.




Quoting Anonymous:

You're a horrible person.


I can't believe you lead on the parents just to say nevermind. :-(


I'd do whatever I could to you. Sue, small claims...whatever I had grounds to do, I would. Women like you make me sick.

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