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Dirty rotten kid!

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 14 Replies

I had a different title but wasn't getting any responses. The title is not how I feel about #2. It's jsut meant to get attention.

My best friend of 7 years has 2 daughters: 7 & 2; I have an infant. I helped raise the older daughter and then my friend moved away when she was prego with #2. I've been around for about 3 months now and I don't know if I can deal anymore. #2 is a brat. She's whinny, demanding, destructive. I even made a point of saying that I didn't remember her #1 acting that way and she says 1 never did. I can't even relax because when we let the 2 los watch a movie, left for 5 min, and when we come back in her #2 had a pillow over my infant and was laying on her! I've never wanted to beat a child before but right there I did. 2 asks for something to eat/drink and I give it to her, she then proceeds to tear the food apart and put it on my furniture, dump her cup on my floor, chase my dog, and take my baby's toys right out of her hand. 

I love my friend and I love her older daughter, but #2 needs some damn manners and I feel the only way it's going to happen is if I step in and teach her. Her mom just yells at her or lets her do whatever. I don't want to tell my friend how to raise her kid, esp since I'm a new mom, but I've been babysitting since I was 12 and helped raise her first one and there is just some behavior that has to be stopped.

How do I address this to her without pissing her off and ruining a 7 year friendship?

Posted by Anonymous on Oct. 8, 2012 at 6:46 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Oct. 8, 2012 at 7:12 PM

I asked her to teach me how to be patient with #2 and  she didn't say anything except "that's how all 2nd children act". IS this true? I didn't know birth order determined which kids were going to hang, jump, and walk on my furniture right after being rold no. And there are no disabilities, mental or otherwise involved.

TinDoll
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 7:16 PM

BUMP!

beachbabies6
by Gold Member on Oct. 8, 2012 at 7:17 PM

just tell her and say you are trying not to offend

ButterMeUp
by Butters on Oct. 8, 2012 at 7:20 PM

I would just tell her what's up and if it did not change I would have to leave them alone. We, as parent's, all have our moments and times when we are not doing our jobs correctly. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Oct. 8, 2012 at 7:22 PM

That's what I figured but I say things really harsh without meaning too. Any advice on how to bring it up?

Quoting beachbabies6:

just tell her and say you are trying not to offend


mamakin616
by Bronze Member on Oct. 8, 2012 at 7:23 PM
1 mom liked this

Thats not how all 2nd children act...thats how all kids that have no structure or discipline act. She is obviously letting this little girl do what ever she wants to do .You should not feel bad or worry about losing your friendship. She is not worrying about losing your friendship when she is allowing her child to act like that in your home...I'm quite sure she knows the child is doing it because of her lack of parenting the girl.Speak up and say I have rules in my house and when you are here you will follow them ,if you want to dump food and drink all over your Mama's furniture that is up to Her ,but I do not allow that behavior in my house. You have to demand respect or you will be walked on ...thats why she acts the way she does ...Please do not allow her to do this to you and your family in your home .You are doing her no favors by letting it continue.

roardiva
by on Oct. 8, 2012 at 7:24 PM

no not all 2nd kids do that! my 3 dont do that. its time to implement time outs and consequences for actions.

Quoting Anonymous:

I asked her to teach me how to be patient with #2 and  she didn't say anything except "that's how all 2nd children act". IS this true? I didn't know birth order determined which kids were going to hang, jump, and walk on my furniture right after being rold no. And there are no disabilities, mental or otherwise involved.


beachbabies6
by Gold Member on Oct. 8, 2012 at 7:33 PM

maybe sit her down and calmly say we need to talk

Quoting Anonymous:

That's what I figured but I say things really harsh without meaning too. Any advice on how to bring it up?

Quoting beachbabies6:

just tell her and say you are trying not to offend



Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Oct. 8, 2012 at 7:34 PM

so i should go ahead and treat her like my kid; correct her behavior? I don't want to overstep. Like I said, I don't want ot tell her how to raise her kid but I know when I was there with #1 NONE of that behavior was evident. It was respectful and when you're told no you stop doing it. I was there almost every day from the time she was 3 mo till she was 41/2 and they moved.

Quoting roardiva:


no not all 2nd kids do that! my 3 dont do that. its time to implement time outs and consequences for actions.

Quoting Anonymous:

I asked her to teach me how to be patient with #2 and  she didn't say anything except "that's how all 2nd children act". IS this true? I didn't know birth order determined which kids were going to hang, jump, and walk on my furniture right after being rold no. And there are no disabilities, mental or otherwise involved.



Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Oct. 8, 2012 at 7:35 PM

Well I'm supposed to see her again tonight. I'll try it. Thanks

Quoting beachbabies6:

maybe sit her down and calmly say we need to talk

Quoting Anonymous:

That's what I figured but I say things really harsh without meaning too. Any advice on how to bring it up?

Quoting beachbabies6:

just tell her and say you are trying not to offend




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