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Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 20 Replies
My hubs is s great dad--when he WANTS to be. For that Im grateful. The other half of the time he thinks hes entitled to all this "me" time instead of helping with our son or the house. Hes always making promises everytime we discuss this but it hardly gets better. Anyone else feel like the only 24/7 parent? Or what have you done to change this
Posted by Anonymous on Oct. 9, 2012 at 7:10 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Lindsayhoy0612
by on Oct. 9, 2012 at 7:14 AM
With our first it was a 95-5 parenting lol and now he's so much better but if the baby cries its just expected that I will get her and that I will do homework with our son he will step up but it's assumed I will handle it
Leobaby2007
by on Oct. 9, 2012 at 7:15 AM
I went away for 8 days this summer to meet my brother and SIL, who were vacationing in Europe. We went to Amsterdam and Berlin while DH took time off work and stayed with our son. It was a win-win for everyone involved.

Also, this past September, DH took our son to India to visit relatives for 2 weeks. I decided not to go with them and I had 2 GLORIOUS weeks to myself!!!!! It was GREAT!!!!
armywife0424
by on Oct. 9, 2012 at 7:17 AM
No I dont thank gosh. My husband is a complete hands on dad and helps me with house stuff. I always appreciated him but recently went back to work myself and now I really appreciate him. He works twice as long a day as me and sometimes when I come home all I want to do is sit but the kids need me so I can only imagine how exhausted he is. I married a real man and great father :) I hope things get better with your dh
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AmberRose1122
by Gold Member on Oct. 9, 2012 at 7:19 AM
My husband steps up more than I do most of the time lol. He's clinically diagnosed OCD and ADD, so he does the majority of the housework (he wants things a certain way and who am I to argue). We split homework help. I do reading and language arts, he covers math and science. Of course, our son is 8, ns he is not the biological father. I'm currently pregnant with his first biological child...so we will see how baby care goes. I think he will help as much as he can, because he's the type that wakes up just when I go to the bathroom to ask if I'm alright and if I need anything.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Oct. 9, 2012 at 8:17 AM

Thank you! I hope so too! Slowly but surely...just seems like improvement is going at a turtle's pace sometimes :/


No I dont thank gosh. My husband is a complete hands on dad and helps me with house stuff. I always appreciated him but recently went back to work myself and now I really appreciate him. He works twice as long a day as me and sometimes when I come home all I want to do is sit but the kids need me so I can only imagine how exhausted he is. I married a real man and great father :) I hope things get better with your dh


Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Oct. 9, 2012 at 8:19 AM

Oh wow! Sounds like you have an AMAZING hubby if he just wakes up to ask if you are okay! How nice. I totally get the OCD, I struggle too. I have managed to let go enough, most of the time, to let DH TRY to clean LOL. Then I usually come back after him and do the extra 20%! 

Congrats on your pregnancy! When are you due?

Quoting AmberRose1122:

My husband steps up more than I do most of the time lol. He's clinically diagnosed OCD and ADD, so he does the majority of the housework (he wants things a certain way and who am I to argue). We split homework help. I do reading and language arts, he covers math and science. Of course, our son is 8, ns he is not the biological father. I'm currently pregnant with his first biological child...so we will see how baby care goes. I think he will help as much as he can, because he's the type that wakes up just when I go to the bathroom to ask if I'm alright and if I need anything.


Anonymous
by Anonymous on Oct. 9, 2012 at 8:20 AM

Yes - step up.  Step up and set clear expectations and boundaries, and include in that your own "me time" as all good parents must take time for themselves. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Oct. 9, 2012 at 8:22 AM
When we were young and had babies my husband was like that. He would help when I asked but wasn't as involved as I wanted. Now our kids are 4,5 and 8 and he is amazing! He does homework , takes them to school events , doctor etc alone without me asking. And he is always having heart to hearts with them etc. he he completely different from being 19-20 to now 28.
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Oct. 9, 2012 at 8:24 AM

It was like that for awhile, more so in the first 6 months. I was in such a stupor from up all night feedings and new mommy mode that I didn't even realize it LOL. I woke up one day and was like "Here, you are fully capable. Feed him, change him, and hang out for awhile. I'm going to the store!" LOL....now my hubs will just go off and do errands WITH little man. That is so nice to see.

How did you get your man to start pitching in more at the house? Do you ask or does he just do it? Whenever I ask it is a BIG HUGE ordeal. Thinking of making a list but I don't want that to come across like a mom. Its just impossible talking to him so all I can think of is resorting to writing!

Quoting Lindsayhoy0612:

With our first it was a 95-5 parenting lol and now he's so much better but if the baby cries its just expected that I will get her and that I will do homework with our son he will step up but it's assumed I will handle it


Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Oct. 9, 2012 at 8:31 AM

Wow! What a change! I am happy for you that he does so much! Did this just happen over time?

Maybe it is just a case of maturity....good point. He is 28 but a big kid at heart.

Quoting Anonymous:

When we were young and had babies my husband was like that. He would help when I asked but wasn't as involved as I wanted. Now our kids are 4,5 and 8 and he is amazing! He does homework , takes them to school events , doctor etc alone without me asking. And he is always having heart to hearts with them etc. he he completely different from being 19-20 to now 28.


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