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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Is being a divorced parent easier than a married parent?

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
I've been wondering about this. I am a full time mom and I love it, but sometimes I would like a day off. I have divorced friends and at least 2 days a week, they get to clean house and chill.
I never want to be divorced, but I am just curious.
Posted by Anonymous on Oct. 10, 2012 at 6:12 AM
Replies (21-28):
Sunshinebee0502
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 2:01 PM

 I don't know I think they both in that sense have pros and cons. I'm divorced when my kids go to their father's house I work and go to school but I mean I get a full night of sleep. I don't have to worry about making dinner or checking homework but when I was married these things were a part of our compromises as married parents. If I woke up with the kids one night I would make him do it the next night or maybe let me take a nap. So I think it's a tricky situation. I can see how it could come off that way though. I also have to say that while I enjoy certain aspects of the alone time and stuff when my kids are gone I can't explain how much I miss them and how much it hurts to not be able to experience or witness them enjoying time with their father.  It doesn't make any amount of bubble baths worth it for me.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Oct. 11, 2012 at 2:47 PM
Quoting Sunshinebee0502:

 I don't know I think they both in that sense have pros and cons. I'm divorced when my kids go to their father's house I work and go to school but I mean I get a full night of sleep. I don't have to worry about making dinner or checking homework but when I was married these things were a part of our compromises as married parents. If I woke up with the kids one night I would make him do it the next night or maybe let me take a nap. So I think it's a tricky situation. I can see how it could come off that way though. I also have to say that while I enjoy certain aspects of the alone time and stuff when my kids are gone I can't explain how much I miss them and how much it hurts to not be able to experience or witness them enjoying time with their father.  It doesn't make any amount of bubble baths worth it for me.




Thank you, I hope to never divorce, but I was just curious
GLO682
by Silver Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 2:54 PM

 being married would be easier if you had a partner that gave you time to do things for yourself also.

Sunshinebee0502
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 3:10 PM

 Oh you're welcome and no I completely understand being curious about it I wondered it too before i was divorced. And thank you for asking and doing it so nicely =)

Quoting Anonymous:

Quoting Sunshinebee0502:

 I don't know I think they both in that sense have pros and cons. I'm divorced when my kids go to their father's house I work and go to school but I mean I get a full night of sleep. I don't have to worry about making dinner or checking homework but when I was married these things were a part of our compromises as married parents. If I woke up with the kids one night I would make him do it the next night or maybe let me take a nap. So I think it's a tricky situation. I can see how it could come off that way though. I also have to say that while I enjoy certain aspects of the alone time and stuff when my kids are gone I can't explain how much I miss them and how much it hurts to not be able to experience or witness them enjoying time with their father.  It doesn't make any amount of bubble baths worth it for me.




Thank you, I hope to never divorce, but I was just curious

 

ysmeine
by Bronze Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 3:24 PM

Not all divorse mothers have help. But no it definitely is not easier. Once a year I have ex come into town disrupting everything including kids chores and routines. Usually it is for special moments like graduation that become all bout him. I am the one who had to struggle with child care, sick children, activities, housework, setting limits, makiing enough money that children are cared for and for extras so they are not teased. I don't get a break at night and I don't get nights off. Granted my youngest is 17 and I have time to myself now, but it was work to get here. I dread when my daughter gets married. 

The only benefits I have found: if your child does something wrong you only have to worry about correcting them and the situation you don't have to worry about someone elses reaction to their wrong. Also as in my case where there was a serious difference in morals, it is easier to teach them right from wrong without the other parent. I can also raise them in a nonviolent environment.

Sometimes divorse is the best descision, but it isn't easy in any situation.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Oct. 11, 2012 at 9:50 PM

I'm sure there are pros and cons to both situations. Depends on what kind of ex you have though. My Dad didn't have regular visitation EVER. NO break for my Mom.

isabellah
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 10:17 PM

That all depends on the relationship between the parents and the financial health of both parent.  In that case it could be pretty sweet.  But usually its no money, only one parent and exhaustion.

LuvMyBoys09
by Silver Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 10:21 PM
It's easier for me because caring for my ex was like caring for another child...he didn't cook, clean, take anything seriously etc etc....just another person to take care of.

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