Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Stranger Danger should still be taught to kids!

Posted by   + Show Post

 I can't help but wonder, with all the recent news of kidnappings, how these guys got these kids. The missing girl in Colorado is very close to home being but a couple hours away. The same day a girl went missing from Cody, WY. She was later found and it's come out that she got in a strangers car because he asked her to help him find his dog.

Growing up we had a code word. We didn't get in the car with anyone who did not know the code word. We did not help people find lost dogs. We gave directions from the side walk. We knew to run screaming if someone approached us. My siblings and I would never have been that girl taken and raped in Cody, WY. My children will not be either. I will teach them as I was taught.

Are people just not doing that anymore?

by on Oct. 10, 2012 at 3:37 PM
Replies (101-107):
kansasmom1978
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 12:36 AM
1 mom liked this

Only an idiot does not teach their kids stranger danger. Not letting them go into a strangers car is teaching them. I think if anyone is dense it's her.

Quoting jessi2girls:

Yes we are arguing the same thing.. she still however doesn't agree with stranger danger and insists she won't teach her children it (even though clearly she's taught her children the general basics).

Quoting kansasmom1978:

Your both argueing the same thing. We have to teach our kids to not keep quiet. Don't talk to strangers, don't go with strangers, run away, scream, kick, bite, give them hell. If someone you know is abusing you, touching you or hurting you. Do not keep quiet. Scream. Tell your mom or dad immediately. If someone says don't tell, you tell as soon as possible. Secrets are not good. And my kids are taught we don't keep secrets, except Christmas presents of course. It's about teaching our kids to be aware of their surroundings, people around them and to follow their gut. I was sexually abused for 5 years by my mom's bf. I tried to tell her and she laughed at me. It took 3 more years when i was placed in state custody for me to get the nerve to tell again. He was not a a stranger. But he was dangerous.

A stranger is dangerous. A stranger is scary. My kids are taught not to trust someone they don't know. Not to take anything from someone they don't know. 

Quoting jessi2girls:

Teaching safety about strangers, and not entering into their cars IS stranger danger..

yes you are the misinformed one, because you fail to realize how you've even applied it.

BUT.. if you want to continue to debate, go ahead.. obviously you just want to come out looking either like an idiot, or a hypocrite.

Quoting Kitschy:

I don't know if I would have been kidnapped. I had men ask me if I wanted rides all the time on my way home from school. I had a guy follow me in his car and block me from where I was going. That has nothing to do with it. Just because I didn't get in to a strangers car doesn't mean there aren't other ways to teach safety. Stranger danger isn't the only method of teaching that keeps children safe. I know you think it's the only way and best way but I don't think you even understand the alternative. I'm the misinformed one though. Smh.

Quoting jessi2girls:

If you had, you wouldn't disagree with it because you'd realize that when it comes down to it, it does actually work to save children that have a chance of escape.

Quoting Kitschy:

How do you know it didn't?



Quoting jessi2girls:

As a child, someone trying to abduct you.. that was a stranger. If that's never happened to you, how can you be the judge of whether it works or not?  Because people don't want to fund programing for it because it's not as common as other abuse issues? That's really why they've pulled it from some schools..

Quoting Kitschy:

What do you mean I've never applied it?





Quoting jessi2girls:

Yes, you are misinformed.  Stranger danger works IF the parents and teachers/faculty/police departmetns are involved enough to teach it properly to children in a way that it is understandable to them.

Stranger danger isn't meant to protect children against people they know that may be harmful.. THAT is another issue/topic entirely that deals with abuse. This is where your "studies" fail to note the key differences.. stranger danger is to help protect children that have a chance to get away from a stranger trying to kidnap them. 

Abuse by someone they know, is discussed sometimes within schools, sometimes by the parents.. sometimes both... but if you discuss each of the topics in question there is no reason a child should have issues comprehending them.

Again, my child is 4, and has no difficulty knowing the difference between the topics.

And yes I say "studies" because there aren't any real studies, they are opinions based on people that fail to seperate the two very completely different topics...

You aren't fully informed about it, because unless you've applied it yourself, you can't truly understand it or how it works.

Take it from someone whose life was saved because of it. It works.

Quoting Kitschy:

Because my opinion differs from yours I'm misinformed? I suppose all the studies on why stranger danger isn't affective are also misinformed, I suppose the states that no longer have it in their curriculum because they feel it isn't effective are also misinformed because they don't share your opinion?

I'm not saying that they don't tell students that people in uniform can help them, or that even people they know can be dangerous and I realize it isn't confusing for an adult. IMO it is confusing to a child because they do not posses the abstract thinking capabilities of an adult nor the complexity of trust. They either trust someone or they don't. It's black and white for them. Adults have different degrees of trust. Young children don't understand this. A stranger is the least likely person to harm my child, so I feel focusing on them is counterproductive. This is how I feel. You can believe that your area has a superior way of teaching stranger danger over the rest of the country and that's fine. I still wouldn't want any part of it. I live in a very large city. I'm very friendly with strangers in general and so are my kids. We actually invite strangers in to our home on a regular basis. I volunteer at a homeless shelter where I help strangers every week. I want my kids to have street smarts, so that's what I teach them. Stranger danger simply isn't for us. It's fine that you love it. I don't. Not because I'm misinformed, but because I understand it fully and disagree.

Quoting jessi2girls:

No YOU are completely missing the point..

the point is very simple.. if the programs given in your area aren't discussing things like I brought up below, then they aren't properly giving out the information for the program, or you have a very poor understanding of the program..

Either way, you are very misinformed about stranger danger, if this is your opinion.











jessi2girls
by Ruby Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 12:41 AM

Yes, you are teaching a large part of stranger danger..

whether you choose to use the term "stranger" or choose to say don't take rides from anyone but mommy and ____...

the result is the same..

teaching children about safety around people they don't know..

You are too focused on termonology when you should be focused on what the real focus is.. safety.

Quoting Kitschy:

Okay just to clarify. Lol so if I tell my kids not to accept rides from anyone under any circumstances, I'm teaching stranger danger? We don't say you aren't allowed to talk to strangers. In fact we don't use the word stranger ever! Because it's the concept of the term stranger that I don't agree with, not the premise of safety.

Quoting jessi2girls:

LMAO.. obviously if you are teaching your kids not to get into cars with strangers you are teaching them stranger danger... is that ALL stranger danger is? Obviously not, but it's a large part of it..

yet I'M the one who's dense.. LMAO..

Yeah, good night, you clearly are in denial about it's benefits, even though you implement them.. such a hypocrite.

Quoting Kitschy:

Good night. Enjoy your opinion. You seem to think it's fact. If your area teaches nothing more than to not get in a car with a stranger then you are right, it's very different in your area then the whole rest of the country. Obviously I must be teaching my kids to get in to cars with people they don't know. Ffs. How dense.
Quoting jessi2girls:

Teaching safety about strangers, and not entering into their cars IS stranger danger..

yes you are the misinformed one, because you fail to realize how you've even applied it.

BUT.. if you want to continue to debate, go ahead.. obviously you just want to come out looking either like an idiot, or a hypocrite.

Quoting Kitschy:

I don't know if I would have been kidnapped. I had men ask me if I wanted rides all the time on my way home from school. I had a guy follow me in his car and block me from where I was going. That has nothing to do with it. Just because I didn't get in to a strangers car doesn't mean there aren't other ways to teach safety. Stranger danger isn't the only method of teaching that keeps children safe. I know you think it's the only way and best way but I don't think you even understand the alternative. I'm the misinformed one though. Smh.



Quoting jessi2girls:

If you had, you wouldn't disagree with it because you'd realize that when it comes down to it, it does actually work to save children that have a chance of escape.

Quoting Kitschy:

How do you know it didn't?





Quoting jessi2girls:

As a child, someone trying to abduct you.. that was a stranger. If that's never happened to you, how can you be the judge of whether it works or not?  Because people don't want to fund programing for it because it's not as common as other abuse issues? That's really why they've pulled it from some schools..

Quoting Kitschy:

What do you mean I've never applied it?











Quoting jessi2girls:

Yes, you are misinformed.  Stranger danger works IF the parents and teachers/faculty/police departmetns are involved enough to teach it properly to children in a way that it is understandable to them.

Stranger danger isn't meant to protect children against people they know that may be harmful.. THAT is another issue/topic entirely that deals with abuse. This is where your "studies" fail to note the key differences.. stranger danger is to help protect children that have a chance to get away from a stranger trying to kidnap them. 

Abuse by someone they know, is discussed sometimes within schools, sometimes by the parents.. sometimes both... but if you discuss each of the topics in question there is no reason a child should have issues comprehending them.

Again, my child is 4, and has no difficulty knowing the difference between the topics.

And yes I say "studies" because there aren't any real studies, they are opinions based on people that fail to seperate the two very completely different topics...

You aren't fully informed about it, because unless you've applied it yourself, you can't truly understand it or how it works.

Take it from someone whose life was saved because of it. It works.

Quoting Kitschy:

Because my opinion differs from yours I'm misinformed? I suppose all the studies on why stranger danger isn't affective are also misinformed, I suppose the states that no longer have it in their curriculum because they feel it isn't effective are also misinformed because they don't share your opinion?

I'm not saying that they don't tell students that people in uniform can help them, or that even people they know can be dangerous and I realize it isn't confusing for an adult. IMO it is confusing to a child because they do not posses the abstract thinking capabilities of an adult nor the complexity of trust. They either trust someone or they don't. It's black and white for them. Adults have different degrees of trust. Young children don't understand this. A stranger is the least likely person to harm my child, so I feel focusing on them is counterproductive. This is how I feel. You can believe that your area has a superior way of teaching stranger danger over the rest of the country and that's fine. I still wouldn't want any part of it. I live in a very large city. I'm very friendly with strangers in general and so are my kids. We actually invite strangers in to our home on a regular basis. I volunteer at a homeless shelter where I help strangers every week. I want my kids to have street smarts, so that's what I teach them. Stranger danger simply isn't for us. It's fine that you love it. I don't. Not because I'm misinformed, but because I understand it fully and disagree.

Quoting jessi2girls:

No YOU are completely missing the point..

the point is very simple.. if the programs given in your area aren't discussing things like I brought up below, then they aren't properly giving out the information for the program, or you have a very poor understanding of the program..

Either way, you are very misinformed about stranger danger, if this is your opinion.










Kitschy
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 12:43 AM
The post was about teaching stranger danger in school. Lol it's a nationally taught program with a specific curriculum. I don't agree with the method in which it's taught. I don't know what is so hard to understand.

Quoting jessi2girls:

Yes, you are teaching a large part of stranger danger..

whether you choose to use the term "stranger" or choose to say don't take rides from anyone but mommy and ____...

the result is the same..

teaching children about safety around people they don't know..

You are too focused on termonology when you should be focused on what the real focus is.. safety.

Quoting Kitschy:

Okay just to clarify. Lol so if I tell my kids not to accept rides from anyone under any circumstances, I'm teaching stranger danger? We don't say you aren't allowed to talk to strangers. In fact we don't use the word stranger ever! Because it's the concept of the term stranger that I don't agree with, not the premise of safety.



Quoting jessi2girls:

LMAO.. obviously if you are teaching your kids not to get into cars with strangers you are teaching them stranger danger... is that ALL stranger danger is? Obviously not, but it's a large part of it..

yet I'M the one who's dense.. LMAO..

Yeah, good night, you clearly are in denial about it's benefits, even though you implement them.. such a hypocrite.

Quoting Kitschy:

Good night. Enjoy your opinion. You seem to think it's fact. If your area teaches nothing more than to not get in a car with a stranger then you are right, it's very different in your area then the whole rest of the country. Obviously I must be teaching my kids to get in to cars with people they don't know. Ffs. How dense.
Quoting jessi2girls:

Teaching safety about strangers, and not entering into their cars IS stranger danger..

yes you are the misinformed one, because you fail to realize how you've even applied it.

BUT.. if you want to continue to debate, go ahead.. obviously you just want to come out looking either like an idiot, or a hypocrite.

Quoting Kitschy:

I don't know if I would have been kidnapped. I had men ask me if I wanted rides all the time on my way home from school. I had a guy follow me in his car and block me from where I was going. That has nothing to do with it. Just because I didn't get in to a strangers car doesn't mean there aren't other ways to teach safety. Stranger danger isn't the only method of teaching that keeps children safe. I know you think it's the only way and best way but I don't think you even understand the alternative. I'm the misinformed one though. Smh.



Quoting jessi2girls:

If you had, you wouldn't disagree with it because you'd realize that when it comes down to it, it does actually work to save children that have a chance of escape.

Quoting Kitschy:

How do you know it didn't?





Quoting jessi2girls:

As a child, someone trying to abduct you.. that was a stranger. If that's never happened to you, how can you be the judge of whether it works or not?  Because people don't want to fund programing for it because it's not as common as other abuse issues? That's really why they've pulled it from some schools..

Quoting Kitschy:

What do you mean I've never applied it?













Quoting jessi2girls:

Yes, you are misinformed.  Stranger danger works IF the parents and teachers/faculty/police departmetns are involved enough to teach it properly to children in a way that it is understandable to them.

Stranger danger isn't meant to protect children against people they know that may be harmful.. THAT is another issue/topic entirely that deals with abuse. This is where your "studies" fail to note the key differences.. stranger danger is to help protect children that have a chance to get away from a stranger trying to kidnap them. 

Abuse by someone they know, is discussed sometimes within schools, sometimes by the parents.. sometimes both... but if you discuss each of the topics in question there is no reason a child should have issues comprehending them.

Again, my child is 4, and has no difficulty knowing the difference between the topics.

And yes I say "studies" because there aren't any real studies, they are opinions based on people that fail to seperate the two very completely different topics...

You aren't fully informed about it, because unless you've applied it yourself, you can't truly understand it or how it works.

Take it from someone whose life was saved because of it. It works.

Quoting Kitschy:

Because my opinion differs from yours I'm misinformed? I suppose all the studies on why stranger danger isn't affective are also misinformed, I suppose the states that no longer have it in their curriculum because they feel it isn't effective are also misinformed because they don't share your opinion?

I'm not saying that they don't tell students that people in uniform can help them, or that even people they know can be dangerous and I realize it isn't confusing for an adult. IMO it is confusing to a child because they do not posses the abstract thinking capabilities of an adult nor the complexity of trust. They either trust someone or they don't. It's black and white for them. Adults have different degrees of trust. Young children don't understand this. A stranger is the least likely person to harm my child, so I feel focusing on them is counterproductive. This is how I feel. You can believe that your area has a superior way of teaching stranger danger over the rest of the country and that's fine. I still wouldn't want any part of it. I live in a very large city. I'm very friendly with strangers in general and so are my kids. We actually invite strangers in to our home on a regular basis. I volunteer at a homeless shelter where I help strangers every week. I want my kids to have street smarts, so that's what I teach them. Stranger danger simply isn't for us. It's fine that you love it. I don't. Not because I'm misinformed, but because I understand it fully and disagree.

Quoting jessi2girls:

No YOU are completely missing the point..

the point is very simple.. if the programs given in your area aren't discussing things like I brought up below, then they aren't properly giving out the information for the program, or you have a very poor understanding of the program..

Either way, you are very misinformed about stranger danger, if this is your opinion.










Posted on CafeMom Mobile
jessi2girls
by Ruby Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 1:09 AM
1 mom liked this

Please quote where the OP specificially said IN SCHOOL in her original post.. ..

oh wait, it's not there. It's not about teaching stranger danger in school.. it's about the basics of stranger danger.. keeping kids safe.. and no, there isn't a specific curriculum.. it's a general lay out from a campaign program..

You are confusing the COMPANY "stranger danger program" with the campaign that schools adapted...

Stranger danger program.. the COMPANY, doesn't send policemen out however, they have their own employees they send out..

I don't know what's so hard to understand either... you are worried about termonology because you dont' like the term stranger.. yet you tell your children not to get into a car with a stranger...oh excuse me.. someone that isn't mommy or whomever is on the OK list..

You SAY don't like the method.. but you don't even know the method you are referring to because you don't even understand that the programs AREN'T all the same.. (like you previously were assuming)..

And yet, you IMPLEMENT the methods, by teaching your children basic safety about stranger danger


Quoting Kitschy:

The post was about teaching stranger danger in school. Lol it's a nationally taught program with a specific curriculum. I don't agree with the method in which it's taught. I don't know what is so hard to understand.

Quoting jessi2girls:

Yes, you are teaching a large part of stranger danger..

whether you choose to use the term "stranger" or choose to say don't take rides from anyone but mommy and ____...

the result is the same..

teaching children about safety around people they don't know..

You are too focused on termonology when you should be focused on what the real focus is.. safety.

Quoting Kitschy:

Okay just to clarify. Lol so if I tell my kids not to accept rides from anyone under any circumstances, I'm teaching stranger danger? We don't say you aren't allowed to talk to strangers. In fact we don't use the word stranger ever! Because it's the concept of the term stranger that I don't agree with, not the premise of safety.



Quoting jessi2girls:

LMAO.. obviously if you are teaching your kids not to get into cars with strangers you are teaching them stranger danger... is that ALL stranger danger is? Obviously not, but it's a large part of it..

yet I'M the one who's dense.. LMAO..

Yeah, good night, you clearly are in denial about it's benefits, even though you implement them.. such a hypocrite.

Quoting Kitschy:

Good night. Enjoy your opinion. You seem to think it's fact. If your area teaches nothing more than to not get in a car with a stranger then you are right, it's very different in your area then the whole rest of the country. Obviously I must be teaching my kids to get in to cars with people they don't know. Ffs. How dense.
Quoting jessi2girls:

Teaching safety about strangers, and not entering into their cars IS stranger danger..

yes you are the misinformed one, because you fail to realize how you've even applied it.

BUT.. if you want to continue to debate, go ahead.. obviously you just want to come out looking either like an idiot, or a hypocrite.

Quoting Kitschy:

I don't know if I would have been kidnapped. I had men ask me if I wanted rides all the time on my way home from school. I had a guy follow me in his car and block me from where I was going. That has nothing to do with it. Just because I didn't get in to a strangers car doesn't mean there aren't other ways to teach safety. Stranger danger isn't the only method of teaching that keeps children safe. I know you think it's the only way and best way but I don't think you even understand the alternative. I'm the misinformed one though. Smh.



Quoting jessi2girls:

If you had, you wouldn't disagree with it because you'd realize that when it comes down to it, it does actually work to save children that have a chance of escape.

Quoting Kitschy:

How do you know it didn't?





Quoting jessi2girls:

As a child, someone trying to abduct you.. that was a stranger. If that's never happened to you, how can you be the judge of whether it works or not?  Because people don't want to fund programing for it because it's not as common as other abuse issues? That's really why they've pulled it from some schools..

Quoting Kitschy:

What do you mean I've never applied it?













Quoting jessi2girls:

Yes, you are misinformed.  Stranger danger works IF the parents and teachers/faculty/police departmetns are involved enough to teach it properly to children in a way that it is understandable to them.

Stranger danger isn't meant to protect children against people they know that may be harmful.. THAT is another issue/topic entirely that deals with abuse. This is where your "studies" fail to note the key differences.. stranger danger is to help protect children that have a chance to get away from a stranger trying to kidnap them. 

Abuse by someone they know, is discussed sometimes within schools, sometimes by the parents.. sometimes both... but if you discuss each of the topics in question there is no reason a child should have issues comprehending them.

Again, my child is 4, and has no difficulty knowing the difference between the topics.

And yes I say "studies" because there aren't any real studies, they are opinions based on people that fail to seperate the two very completely different topics...

You aren't fully informed about it, because unless you've applied it yourself, you can't truly understand it or how it works.

Take it from someone whose life was saved because of it. It works.

Quoting Kitschy:

Because my opinion differs from yours I'm misinformed? I suppose all the studies on why stranger danger isn't affective are also misinformed, I suppose the states that no longer have it in their curriculum because they feel it isn't effective are also misinformed because they don't share your opinion?

I'm not saying that they don't tell students that people in uniform can help them, or that even people they know can be dangerous and I realize it isn't confusing for an adult. IMO it is confusing to a child because they do not posses the abstract thinking capabilities of an adult nor the complexity of trust. They either trust someone or they don't. It's black and white for them. Adults have different degrees of trust. Young children don't understand this. A stranger is the least likely person to harm my child, so I feel focusing on them is counterproductive. This is how I feel. You can believe that your area has a superior way of teaching stranger danger over the rest of the country and that's fine. I still wouldn't want any part of it. I live in a very large city. I'm very friendly with strangers in general and so are my kids. We actually invite strangers in to our home on a regular basis. I volunteer at a homeless shelter where I help strangers every week. I want my kids to have street smarts, so that's what I teach them. Stranger danger simply isn't for us. It's fine that you love it. I don't. Not because I'm misinformed, but because I understand it fully and disagree.

Quoting jessi2girls:

No YOU are completely missing the point..

the point is very simple.. if the programs given in your area aren't discussing things like I brought up below, then they aren't properly giving out the information for the program, or you have a very poor understanding of the program..

Either way, you are very misinformed about stranger danger, if this is your opinion.











Eco_Momma
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 1:27 AM

Dude RIGHT?! It's CODY! It's safe. You have to worry about cougers and deer in the road not kidnapping rapists. It's so scary here right now. We are all so thankfull she was found and is home.

 OP: are you local?

furbabymum
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 10:27 AM

 I'm in Cheyenne. Always figured it was a safe place too. Still do mostly. It's as safe as you make it I guess.

Quoting Eco_Momma:

Dude RIGHT?! It's CODY! It's safe. You have to worry about cougers and deer in the road not kidnapping rapists. It's so scary here right now. We are all so thankfull she was found and is home.

 OP: are you local?

 

Eco_Momma
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 6:48 PM
1 mom liked this

 This is the SUV that the FBI is looking for. Keep your eyes open my friend.

Quoting furbabymum:

 I'm in Cheyenne. Always figured it was a safe place too. Still do mostly. It's as safe as you make it I guess.

Quoting Eco_Momma:

Dude RIGHT?! It's CODY! It's safe. You have to worry about cougers and deer in the road not kidnapping rapists. It's so scary here right now. We are all so thankfull she was found and is home.

 OP: are you local?

 


Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN