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Stranger Danger should still be taught to kids!

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 I can't help but wonder, with all the recent news of kidnappings, how these guys got these kids. The missing girl in Colorado is very close to home being but a couple hours away. The same day a girl went missing from Cody, WY. She was later found and it's come out that she got in a strangers car because he asked her to help him find his dog.

Growing up we had a code word. We didn't get in the car with anyone who did not know the code word. We did not help people find lost dogs. We gave directions from the side walk. We knew to run screaming if someone approached us. My siblings and I would never have been that girl taken and raped in Cody, WY. My children will not be either. I will teach them as I was taught.

Are people just not doing that anymore?

by on Oct. 10, 2012 at 3:37 PM
Replies (31-40):
TraceyMR
by on Oct. 10, 2012 at 3:55 PM

lol, they scarred me as a kid. My sister and I found an old one when going through her children's toys.


I have three chi mixes, fur is neverending in our home, haha

Quoting furbabymum:

 Furby's are coming back man! I had one as a kid. lol Unfortunately it's about hairy dogs. :P

Quoting TraceyMR:

I don't know what schools teach, but we will be teaching DD about stranger danger but also about telling us if a person ever violates her personally, no matter what the perpetrator says to them.

As an aside, I thought your sn was "Furbymama"

 


sheramom4
by Ruby Member on Oct. 10, 2012 at 3:55 PM


Quoting furbabymum:

 Of course someone could have chased me down, knocked me over the head and taken me. What is the percentage of that though? If I were to be taken I'd put up as much struggle and make as much noise as possible. Predators usually go for the easy kill.

Quoting PeaceLoveZ:

Even people who know and are taught this can still be kidnapped. Look at the amount of missing women, or men even. They knew but they were still abducted. If a bad guy wants to get someone bad enough they will.  You don't know what could happen to your children, don't be so sure it couldn't happen to you.

 

But predators are usually known to the person being victimized, whether child or adult, as well. The percentage of stranger abductions, molestations etc is less than one percent. Statistically you could allow your child to stand on a corner in a large city and it would take 73 years before they were victimized. It is better to teach children how to prevent being in situations where they will be victimized, how to speak up and not to do anything that makes them uncomfortable, even if it is a teacher, coach, or family friend (or even relative) over traditional stranger danger although you should always teach children to not approach strange vehicles.

MrsMeyers81
by on Oct. 10, 2012 at 3:55 PM

I TEACH IT, FROM A YOUNG AGE.. !!!! IT DOESNT TEACH THEM T BE SCARED OF THE WORLD EITHER JUST TO LET THEM KNOW THAT THERE ARE DANGERS OUT THERE NOT THAT EVERYTHING AND ONE IS DANGEROUS THERE IS A DIFFERNCE...

Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Oct. 10, 2012 at 3:55 PM
I have told my kids if someone tries to get them in their car or if they feel something is not right they are to run and yell FIRE! People look more so at a child yelling that than help. Kids use the word help while playing and some times it goes unnoticed. Actually my husbands state patrol friend told me about the word fire will get peoples attention quickly.
spicy_n_sweet
by on Oct. 10, 2012 at 3:56 PM
1 mom liked this

We never taught "stranger danger". Living in a city with close to 1 million people, you are surrounded by strangers every day, all the time. We taught our son to : be aware of your surroundings, be aware of the people around you, be aware of the actions of the people around you, notice if someone is acting sketchy, and how to properly respond to questions/suggestions/demands of someone who he doesn't know.   That's what worked for us, where and how we live (living in the middle of the city, walking or take PT every where,.etc). We never wanted our son to be automatically leery of or suspicious of a person simply because they were a "stranger". We wanted him to learn how to read his surroundings, the people in his surroundings and how to react/respond to those things.. 

JakesMom712
by Ruby Member on Oct. 10, 2012 at 3:56 PM
I used to work as a sexual assault counselor. So many parents never think to talk about good touch/bad touch. Or they limit it go strangers. Most kids who are abused are abused by family/close friends. It's sad.


Quoting cheez1e:

We've had the good touch/bad touch talk too.

Quoting JakesMom712:

I will teach it, along with not allowing people to touch certain body parts.



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jessi2girls
by Ruby Member on Oct. 10, 2012 at 3:56 PM


Quoting Kitschy:

They teach it in schools. I for one don't teach stranger danger and I'm not looking forward to them learning it in school. I think stranger danger is actually detrimental and weakens the senses to be able to protect oneself against actual danger by making all strangers the culprit. I think the message is confusing at best and not well thought out.

I disagree, it actually saved me from being kidnapped when I was a child.. The van had approached several kids, not just me, and had kidnapped one before they arrested him.. no harm was done to the other child thankfully, and they were found in his home, locking in a closet.

If someone hadn't told me about stranger danger, I would have approached the van, and he could very easily have grabbed me.. and if it wasn't for the reports I made to the police about the description of the van, they wouldn't have found the guy.

bmw29
by spitfire_bobbie on Oct. 10, 2012 at 3:56 PM
I agree and I also think that if your child is lost and afraid to seek help from a stranger then that poses it's own problems. Children should be taught the difference between a likely safe stranger and one that seems off. Adults don't normally seek out children to help them solve a problem unless they are up to no good. However the mother at the park with three children of her own is likely safe.

Quoting Kitschy:

They teach it in schools. I for one don't teach stranger danger and I'm not looking forward to them learning it in school. I think stranger danger is actually detrimental and weakens the senses to be able to protect oneself against actual danger by making all strangers the culprit. I think the message is confusing at best and not well thought out.

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Kitschy
by on Oct. 10, 2012 at 3:58 PM

I think that as women in this society we are taught to ignore our gut feelings. We tell kids to be polite and obey adults, then we tell them not to talk to anyone. We tell them to run to a police officer if they are in trouble, but then we tell them that sometimes bad guys dress like people who are supposed to help you. As parents our kids get a false sense of security if we talk to acquaintances in front of them who are actually more likely to violate our children. We have a saying in my home. "what does your tummy say?" we use it to help the kids identify danger of all kinds and not desensitise them to it. When we go to the zoo and the wolf comes up to the glass we want our child to feel and recognize the fear they feel. When my daughter stands on the top of the playground equipment and asks "mom can I jump?" I answer with "what does your tummy tell you?" Kids like adults can sense danger but are taught to ignore it. The focus is set on strangers which makes no sense since most of the time the "bad guy" is someone you know. When someone talks to my kids sometimes they answer them with a smile, and sometimes they hide behind my leg. I never say "don't be shy" or "whats the matter with you?" It's a leaned process and a sense that needs to be developed like anything else.

Quoting furbabymum:

 So you think kids should just be able to tell who is bad and who is good??? The guy who took the girl in Cody, WY was 65 and reminded her of her grandpa. He then raped her and left her in the wilderness to die. She would have if hunters hadn't found her.

Quoting Kitschy:

They teach it in schools. I for one don't teach stranger danger and I'm not looking forward to them learning it in school. I think stranger danger is actually detrimental and weakens the senses to be able to protect oneself against actual danger by making all strangers the culprit. I think the message is confusing at best and not well thought out.

 


JakesMom712
by Ruby Member on Oct. 10, 2012 at 3:58 PM
There was a case here, where a girl fought her attacker hard. He gave up and ran away. She was like 5/6. I was so proud of her. She said she learned it from csi or svu.
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