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My Exbf thinks our CO is just a "baseline or guideline"

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
and I have to be willing to do more than what it says...BWAHAHAHA!!!

ETA: I've been advised to explain my ex is a "stage five clinger" cause I sound a little bitchy...he's sooooo annoying!
Posted by Anonymous on Oct. 11, 2012 at 1:40 AM
Replies (31-36):
1likeme
by Gold Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 2:16 AM
Stop speaking with him over the phone. If he calls ask him via text if he needs to speak about your daughter. If the answer is some BS ignore it. Only respond to texts regarding your daughter. Let him be pissed off. Then read his ranting texts, lol then have a great day.
Ninjascreenname
by Gold Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 2:19 AM
You need to edit the op and say that he's wanting to be all "stage five clinger" to you and not limit your conversations to your daughter. You sound kind of like a real bitter bitch in your op. after you explained it to me, it made sense. :)


Quoting Anonymous:

No where does it say he gets to dictate to me every little thing he wants outside of it.



Quoting Anonymous:

The court order IS meant to be a guideline. They WANT you to work together for the sake of the children.


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
opal10161973
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 2:27 AM

GL with that.  It's been 9 years and three DCF investigations and I STILL have an EX who wants me to violate a CO to suit his 'needs'.  WTF ever.  Sometimes, I cannot wait until my DD9 is 18.  Halfway there and counting.  SIGH.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 11, 2012 at 2:28 AM
Thanks...maybe tomorrow?

Quoting Ninjascreenname:

I'm happy to help. I have my own legal court hell, if you ever need to talk- PM me.




Quoting Anonymous:

This....I will email him this. Thank you!! I had no idea how to word it without asking if he needed a tampon!!





Quoting Ninjascreenname:

Explain to him that you feel like he's blurring the line between healthy coparenting and trying to be in a weird relationship. That your relationship and hopefully conversations are now limited to your daughter.








Quoting Anonymous:

Exactly! He wants to tell me about his day at work, his fun night out, the Chinese food he ate...you name it!




The second I try to put distance....like not answer his calls until I HAVE to...well, then I get "waaaah you're not being reasonable. I'm just trying to have a good relationship with you waaaaa"









Quoting Ninjascreenname:

Oh, he has the "lets be a family" mentality now. Gross. That really sucks. Maybe suggest counseling so he can learn to see you as "your daughters" mom and not "his significant other". Men have a hard time with this, just like women do.












Quoting Anonymous:

Lol, no, no. He talks to her every day between 6 and 8. He also skypes with her several times a week. Next week he's coming to take her for a 3 day weekend.













I'm not a crazy bm. I WANT my DD to have her daddy. But he wants to chat me up all day everyday. He gets pissy when we have plans. He's ANNOYING because he seems to not get he can be her daddy without being up my butt!













Quoting Ninjascreenname:

Why not be a decent human being and work with him? I mean you sound bitter and angry in your op and no child deserves to go through the " I'm not doing more than the CO because he wants me to" game. If he's a danger that's one thing, but if its to be a spiteful bitch, then grow up.



Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 11, 2012 at 2:29 AM
Thanks, I do this a lot actually. I just end up answering the phone so it starts all over again.

Quoting 1likeme:

Stop speaking with him over the phone. If he calls ask him via text if he needs to speak about your daughter. If the answer is some BS ignore it. Only respond to texts regarding your daughter. Let him be pissed off. Then read his ranting texts, lol then have a great day.
Ninjascreenname
by Gold Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 2:30 AM
Anytime hon. :) Have a good night and just explain to him that you just aren't comfortable with this newfound affection and that he needs to step back. Don't lose your cool, which is the hardest part for me. Lol.

How old is your daughter?


Quoting Anonymous:

Thanks...maybe tomorrow?



Quoting Ninjascreenname:

I'm happy to help. I have my own legal court hell, if you ever need to talk- PM me.







Quoting Anonymous:

This....I will email him this. Thank you!! I had no idea how to word it without asking if he needed a tampon!!







Quoting Ninjascreenname:

Explain to him that you feel like he's blurring the line between healthy coparenting and trying to be in a weird relationship. That your relationship and hopefully conversations are now limited to your daughter.











Quoting Anonymous:

Exactly! He wants to tell me about his day at work, his fun night out, the Chinese food he ate...you name it!






The second I try to put distance....like not answer his calls until I HAVE to...well, then I get "waaaah you're not being reasonable. I'm just trying to have a good relationship with you waaaaa"











Quoting Ninjascreenname:

Oh, he has the "lets be a family" mentality now. Gross. That really sucks. Maybe suggest counseling so he can learn to see you as "your daughters" mom and not "his significant other". Men have a hard time with this, just like women do.















Quoting Anonymous:

Lol, no, no. He talks to her every day between 6 and 8. He also skypes with her several times a week. Next week he's coming to take her for a 3 day weekend.

















I'm not a crazy bm. I WANT my DD to have her daddy. But he wants to chat me up all day everyday. He gets pissy when we have plans. He's ANNOYING because he seems to not get he can be her daddy without being up my butt!















Quoting Ninjascreenname:

Why not be a decent human being and work with him? I mean you sound bitter and angry in your op and no child deserves to go through the " I'm not doing more than the CO because he wants me to" game. If he's a danger that's one thing, but if its to be a spiteful bitch, then grow up.








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