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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Abusive 6 year old... HELP

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 11 Replies

First I would like to say that I am not a troll. I am very embarrassed that I let this behavior get this far with him. My son is 6. He will be 7 in January. He used to be such a sweet caring loving child, but ever since he started school last year he has become very abusive to all of his school mates. I do not condone violence in my house. We do spank but only for extreme behaviors. I do time outs and removal of favorite items.

A little back story. I am not with his father. Bash all you will but I made a lot of mistakes in my past. Including reproducing with the 2 men that I did. Both men are not involved with my children and that is their decision not mine (although I am happier this way).They do not support my children either. I am a single mother.

My son started kindergarten last year and started picking up behaviors from the other kids mind you my child had been in daycare and preschools since he was a year so we can not blame him not being near kids before this. All of his new friends would play power rangers and ninjago. This whole time I had been stearing away from shows like that because I knew like all boys would, that he would act out like the shows. Well after a bunch of whining and begging and good behavior I let him watch some of it. YEA BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE!! Now he is crazy. He is constantly hitting, karate chopping and being a "ninja" around all his friends and he is getting abusive towards them. Like all the kids play it but no one connects when they "battle" exvept my son. He doesn't understand that you can't do that. He honestly watched maybe 6 episodes of each show. I have banned all but Nick Jr and Disney Jr on all the TVs in my house. My 3 year old is happy but my oldest hates me. 

He started acting out in school and has been in the principal's office 4 times already for hitting. My town has a no tolerance policy and he is about to get suspended for 21 days if he hits someone again. I plan on meeting with the principal today to discuss ways to get him to stop. 

Yesterday he was on the bus going to the after school program and the kids were hitting each other with seatbelts. Well my son who should know better) decides to bash a kid on the head with it. Thankfully the kid is ok. I have taken away all the stuff that he loves more than anything. Including Halloween and all the activities that go with it. 

Why can't he just understand what he is doing is wrong?? I failed as a mother.... I hate the way my kids have become. I give them everything and anything. I bust my ass so that they can have nice things while I have crap. My only pair of shoes are FLIP FLOPS dammit. I have nothing... Well today I plan on hitting payless and getting some shoes and rain boots for myself)

UGH Any advise would be great. Sorry it is so long... Vent over

Posted by Anonymous on Oct. 11, 2012 at 6:17 AM
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Replies (1-10):
AMDS0304
by Gold Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 6:23 AM
Have you thought maybe its something else going on? Is it only at school?
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 11, 2012 at 6:30 AM
its mostly at school. about 2 years ago he was in behavioral therapies because he would lash out. after evaluating him he was on the adhd scale but after the therapies he was off the chart so i took him out and continued it at home. he was a lot better. the behavior before this started right after his brother was born. he recently started bringing the attitude home with him. he now sits at the table does his homework and reads books until dinner. than after dinner he showers and goes to his room and reads more. i have no other ideas as punishment

Quoting AMDS0304:

Have you thought maybe its something else going on? Is it only at school?
vegamatic
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 6:32 AM

Has he always needed the rough play? Maybe he is getting some sensory input from the rough play. Some kids crave that and will go to great lengths to get it.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 11, 2012 at 6:38 AM
no i mean hes a typical 6 year old. other than the beatings. i just dont get it.

Quoting vegamatic:

Has he always needed the rough play? Maybe he is getting some sensory input from the rough play. Some kids crave that and will go to great lengths to get it.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 11, 2012 at 6:39 AM
oh if i dont answer sorry. im trying to get the kids ready for school and myself for work
PerfectVirgo
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 6:46 AM
Thankfully my kids are the opposite. We have a no touch rule in my house. Unless its hugs or love, we don't touch each other. (Had a problem with my 2 oldest, 12 months apart, used to play rough and 1 would always get hurt). I know you said he was ADHD but off the scale? Maybe you should have him tested again. Just to be sure. Also, sounds like it could be part jealousy of the new baby. Schedule a mommy-son time everyday, maybe just for 20 minutes. Read together without the baby, play together, maybe even watch ninjago and talk about the show and how that's bad to do to others. Hope it helps!!
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Kris_PBG
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 6:47 AM
Please get your child counseling - ASAP.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 11, 2012 at 6:52 AM
we have mommy son days at least 2 times a month. and off the scale meaning that he was no longer classified as adhd. i plan on talking to his dr and getting him the therapies again.

Quoting PerfectVirgo:

Thankfully my kids are the opposite. We have a no touch rule in my house. Unless its hugs or love, we don't touch each other. (Had a problem with my 2 oldest, 12 months apart, used to play rough and 1 would always get hurt). I know you said he was ADHD but off the scale? Maybe you should have him tested again. Just to be sure. Also, sounds like it could be part jealousy of the new baby. Schedule a mommy-son time everyday, maybe just for 20 minutes. Read together without the baby, play together, maybe even watch ninjago and talk about the show and how that's bad to do to others. Hope it helps!!
RaynesMommy07
by Ruby Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 7:15 AM
Sounds like he needs counseling and to be rechecked for ADHD.
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AMDS0304
by Gold Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 11:15 AM
I say get him back into therapy my son has disruptive behavior disorder.. He's pretty well behaved at school and making straight A's but at home he can be bad.


Quoting Anonymous:

its mostly at school. about 2 years ago he was in behavioral therapies because he would lash out. after evaluating him he was on the adhd scale but after the therapies he was off the chart so i took him out and continued it at home. he was a lot better. the behavior before this started right after his brother was born. he recently started bringing the attitude home with him. he now sits at the table does his homework and reads books until dinner. than after dinner he showers and goes to his room and reads more. i have no other ideas as punishment



Quoting AMDS0304:

Have you thought maybe its something else going on? Is it only at school?

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
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