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I just found out my parents are 3rd or 4th cousins :/

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
They just found out too. But they don't think its a big deal. They say its far enough back that they don't consider themselves related. But it kind of freaked me out. I told them I don't wanna hear or speak of it again.

I want to forget about it.. I am too ashamed to tell anyone, even my husband. But I have to live with it and accept it. What am I gonna do, kill myself?

Am I overreacting?
Posted by Anonymous on Oct. 11, 2012 at 8:40 AM
Replies (41-50):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 8 on Oct. 11, 2012 at 9:06 AM
1 mom liked this

Okay, so here's the thing. Even as first cousins the chance of them being genetically alike enough to create a deformed child is slim to none, even brother and sisters are unlikely to have a child with genetic abnormalities. Not saying that it is right or okay by any means... just when we think of inbreeding and genetic abnormalities we are thinking about lines that have inbred over the course of generations. A one time occurance is not going to do much damage. And Fourth cousins... come on. Even if they grew up knowing, there is so much distance between the two it is like marrying your neighbor. 

Mena929
by Gold Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 9:06 AM

Yes you are definitely over reacting.

Aislinn
by Platinum Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 9:06 AM


Quoting anyotherday:


Quoting Aislinn:


Quoting anyotherday:


Quoting Aislinn:

 LMAO You are soooooo overreacting, it is not even funny. Chill pill, Mama. It is no big deal. Most of us whose families have been in one area for a long time have some relatives married to relatives. It happens! Hell, in 34 states, it is legal to marry your first cousin! lol 

Ha! Just like my area.... I dont claim to be part of my mom's extended family tree but just found out Im related to five (maybe more) people I work with through my mom's side! It just happens to be one of "THE" families in my area. And most of them have crossed over here and there through the generations

 My family has been in Maine since Maine was Massachusetts. lol So hasn't my husbands. We did find out he is my Aunt's third cousin, but my aunt is married in and not a blood relative. This happens. I mean, it is not like they are the twins that got separated at birth, found each other and fell in love and found out they were actually separated at birth! lol They are fourth cousins. The blood line is so minoot.

Woohoo MAINE! We're Downeast. I refuse to see if DH's family and my mom's family are intertwined at all. Although I doubt it, It doesnt seem to be so far, with the small amount of research Ive done so far. Now, DH's STEP FAMILY, yeah, that's mixed in with mine for sure. 

 LOL Are you in Maine? See, the Mainers understand! We are all related, one way or another... There is only a million of us... What can we say? lol I was just Downeast this weekend doing some leaf peeping. We were a tad early, I guess. Figures. lol

Anonymous
by Anonymous 9 on Oct. 11, 2012 at 9:09 AM

that's nothing to be ashamed of really. a lot of families have very distant relationships that marry. they only worry when they're very closely related, such as first cousins. it's not a very big deal. 

cherrywaves21
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 9:09 AM
Thanks:). That's my mom's favorite saying and I thought it fit quite nicely lol.


Quoting AshleyBDG:

Agreed and I love your choice of words, lol.



Quoting cherrywaves21:

Agreed!! Op is a wee bit of a wack a do.



Quoting MamaRae85:


Quoting cherrywaves21:

Sweet Jesus woman. You need to get a firm grasp on reality and quickly.

Seriously! And what the crap is with all the women telling her to keep it a secret! Anyone with a modicum of biology education should know that they're not any more genetically related than most other people, and that there's no way that it's ever going to present problems. Well, unless the OP CREATES a problem.

Not to mention the fact that  you, OP, are making them feel ashamed for something not only was unbeknownst to them when they got married, it also wouldn't and SHOULDN'T have kept them from getting married even if they HAD known! Grow up and educate yourself about genetics. And leave your poor parents alone about it.






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anyotherday
by Ruby Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 9:10 AM


Quoting Aislinn:


Quoting anyotherday:


Quoting Aislinn:


Quoting anyotherday:



 LOL Are you in Maine? See, the Mainers understand! We are all related, one way or another... There is only a million of us... What can we say? lol I was just Downeast this weekend doing some leaf peeping. We were a tad early, I guess. Figures. lol

Enh, DH and I were talking about the leafs changing a little early this year. Its a good thing you caught them early, they'll all be blown off by the time the leaf tour busses start coming through! We live right outside Machias. 

twinmommy27
by Ruby Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 9:11 AM
What?? Was this on CM?


Quoting twinmom86:

At least it's not as bad as the woman from Ohio who found out she'd been married to her dad for 40 + years! She didn't even find out until several years after he had died apparently he knew the whole time! Now THAT is disturbing.


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hautemama83
by Emerald Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 9:11 AM
You're way overreacting.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 10 on Oct. 11, 2012 at 9:11 AM
Way overreacting that really isn't related anymore in my mind.
vwd_johnson
by Ruby Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 9:12 AM
3rd or 4th cousins are pretty far out on the family line. If you break it down, everyone is kind of related in one way or another ... id let it go. Its not a big deal. Its not like them making children causes any genetic disorders. They aren't harming anyone, and they didn't even know!

Leave it alone.
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