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DD's teacher is coddling her

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My DD's preschool teacher rubs me the wrong way because she reminds me of my MIL. lol Her and my daughter seem to have a strange relationship. The teacher says she "keeps her close" whatever that means. Anyway we had a field trip to the fire station on Tuesday and I got to see first hand what this means. About 10 minutes in to the trip my dd came over to me crying because the firemen were scaring the crap out of her. She's never heard of the jaws of life or thought about her house being on fire before so it was a little overwhelming for her. 

I had planned to give her a hug, talk to her for a minute and then send her back to the class. Well her teacher butts in and says "what's wrong?" I tell her that DD just got a little scared, so she says "okay come by me sweetie and hold my hand"

That was that. My daughter missed out on the rest of the field trip because she stood in the back with her teacher holding her hand. The teacher was stroking her cheak and hair. It was so odd to me. 

I've posted about here before, I think it's weird that she tells my daughter that she loves her all the time. I just feel like that kind of talk and affection is more appropriate for family members. Her teacher, IMO should be a more logical figure, and less emotional. Does that make sense?  I know a good deal of this is my problem because the teacher erks, me. I know it's not the end of the world for her to be with this teacher for the class......I just think the whole thing is weird. I'm also thinking that because she reminds me of my MIL who lives out of state, maybe she reminds DD of her too and that's why my DD is acting the way she does around her.

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by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 11:19 AM
Replies (11-20):
by Cat on Oct. 11, 2012 at 12:22 PM
1 mom liked this

Its a little odd, but then again my son's teacher adores my son.. He was super excited to get him into the classroom..... Idk why, at first it creeped my out... but I can see where you are coming from. Maybe talk to her?

Quoting Kitschy:

I think I would be fine with it if she treated all the kids that way. I think it's my kid being singled out that bothers me.

Quoting notjstanothrmom:

Hmmm... that to me seems like a good thing as long as it's not creepy. My son's teacher wrote notes signed "Love, Mrs. _________" since before the school year started. I think it's good that her teacher does love her and teachers do love their students, esp. the younger ones.

Im a mommy & a wife. Im for gay rights, I support Pro Choice. . I am a Wiccan, I choose photography as a hobby, I choose to spank my child.  His manners matter, never breast feed. I am an animal lover, stong believer in being honest.  Mt. Dew is my drug of choice. Im alsoTattooed, pierced.  gun carring, loving my son kinda of mommy. Judge me, I don't care.

by Anonymous 2 on Oct. 11, 2012 at 12:23 PM
When I worked in day care there was a 3 year old boy who was like my shadow. He acted like I was his mom when he was there and it's just what worked for him. I can understand the hand holding but stroking her hair and cheek is a little much for me. I did have to carry the little boy around every once and a while mainly on field trips when there was alot going on.
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 12:25 PM

Um, that's creepy as hell to me.

by Emerald Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 12:26 PM

It sounds odd, but I wonder something.  Could the teacher possibly be getting signals from you are your daughter that your daughter has a rough or stressful homelife?  I have known teachers that would behave this way towards children that they felt were having a tough time at home.

I am not saying that is what it is, I am just wondering at a reason.

by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 12:28 PM
1 mom liked this

 That's very strange that the teacher is acting that way. IMO that crosses the line of appropriate student/teacher relationships. My mom is a coddler & it drives me insane. I want my dd to learn to be self sufficient & confident, not to run to Mimi all the time & have someone else fix her problems.

by Ruby Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 12:30 PM

All I can tell you is that your mother's instincts are rarely wrong.  It may be innocent as in your daughter reminds her of her sister or daughter or someone.  But it does sound a little odd to me too. 

I'd probably tell her that your daughter isn't comfortable with so much touching, though you appreciate that she means well.

Personally, I don't believe in sending very young children off to preschool or anything without me. Co-ops are fine, where parents stay and help somewhere.   If they can't tell me what is going on, they don't need to be away. 

My daughter is 16 and in college at the top of the class.  Lack of preschool or kindergarten didn't hurt her.  I have three degrees.  No preschool or Kindergarten back in my day.  Didn't hurt me either. 

by Anonymous 3 on Oct. 11, 2012 at 12:33 PM

Oh God. ask your child if she is getting touched in her privates. I would never allow anybody to get that close to my child.

by Anonymous 4 on Oct. 11, 2012 at 12:35 PM
She sounds like she just loves your daughter. My daughter texts her old first grade teacher often. They send pictures back & forth & the teacher always tells her she loves her. My dd has been the 'teacher's pet' in all of her classes. Some kids are just super lovable.
by Anonymous 5 on Oct. 11, 2012 at 12:36 PM

 All my sons teachers are like that with him even the ones that aren't his teachers. He goes to a small a private school.

by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 12:39 PM
I would have my daughters class switched. For one the way the teacher is with her is innapropriate and for two I watch too many movies and this screams lifetime movie she's gonna try to take my kid! Lol but really it isn't behavior I would be comfortable with.
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