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Not sure if I should bring this up to my daughter....

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

My daughter received an invitation to a birthday party for Sat.

The problem is, this girl was likely made to invite her whole cheer team. I have heard her mock the newer girls (dd included) and I understand a little bit. She and her "bestie" take tumbling classes and live and breath cheer, meanwhile there are girls who are first years who can't even do a tumble, on the same team not to mention that these girls are 10 and dd is 8.

DD asked her what she wanted for her birthday and the girl told her "oh well I really like Alex and Ani bracelets" I am sorry kid, I am not getting you a $30 bracelet, you're 10.

If dd's friends from cheer are not going, I am considering trying to influence DD to not go. The girl goes to a private school, so dd definitely will not know anyone, and I feel like they are just doing it to "include everyone" and to get more presents.

I am not terribly happy to bring her to this party, but I also don't want to say no.

Posted by Anonymous on Oct. 11, 2012 at 4:51 PM
Replies (51-60):
msjaxon
by Platinum Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 6:28 PM
Calling $30 high end is cheap

Quoting PinkieRed:

How is that cheap?

If one of my kids was going to a birthday party for a friend, I'd spend $20-$25, tops.



I have eleven nieces and nephews on my side of the family alone (and one on the way, as my adult niece is pregnant) and I don't buy them birthday gifts. I can't afford it for that many kids. My husband has 100 something nieces and nephews/second nieces and nephews (he has 15 siblings), so no way could we buy gifts for all of them. My side of the family does a Christmas gift exchange every year, for the under 18 year old kids. Each adult buys for one kid, and we cap it at $20.

I don't think the OP is being cheap at all, especially considering that this girl is not even a close friend of her daughter's.
Quoting msjaxon:

Why are you so cheap? How broke are you guys?

Quoting Anonymous:

we don't even spend that much on family, unless it is my nephew, then I might hit $30.

But I wouldn't get one thing that cost $30, if I spent that much it would be because I got a few things. Our budget for any birthday party is $15-$20 if we really can't find something under $15.


 I don't even know what to get this kid, maybe a gift card to Justice?  I am sure my dd will pick out a doll or a book for her, and I don't think that will float.



Quoting nocalmegan:

Lol I'm laughing at "I'm not spending 30$ on you because you are 10" seriously. Thats a totally reasonable gift price for any age.


But if she's mean to your Dd then make fun plans for that day and tell your Dd you forgot.


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
PinkieRed
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 6:34 PM
I've never even heard of those bracelets. No, I wouldn't call a $30 bracelet high end, but I wouldn't spend that much on a birthday present for a kid my child barely knows, either, though.

Quoting msjaxon:

Calling $30 high end is cheap



Quoting PinkieRed:

How is that cheap?

If one of my kids was going to a birthday party for a friend, I'd spend $20-$25, tops.





I have eleven nieces and nephews on my side of the family alone (and one on the way, as my adult niece is pregnant) and I don't buy them birthday gifts. I can't afford it for that many kids. My husband has 100 something nieces and nephews/second nieces and nephews (he has 15 siblings), so no way could we buy gifts for all of them. My side of the family does a Christmas gift exchange every year, for the under 18 year old kids. Each adult buys for one kid, and we cap it at $20.

I don't think the OP is being cheap at all, especially considering that this girl is not even a close friend of her daughter's.
Quoting msjaxon:

Why are you so cheap? How broke are you guys?

Quoting Anonymous:

we don't even spend that much on family, unless it is my nephew, then I might hit $30.

But I wouldn't get one thing that cost $30, if I spent that much it would be because I got a few things. Our budget for any birthday party is $15-$20 if we really can't find something under $15.


 I don't even know what to get this kid, maybe a gift card to Justice?  I am sure my dd will pick out a doll or a book for her, and I don't think that will float.



Quoting nocalmegan:

Lol I'm laughing at "I'm not spending 30$ on you because you are 10" seriously. Thats a totally reasonable gift price for any age.


But if she's mean to your Dd then make fun plans for that day and tell your Dd you forgot.


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 11, 2012 at 6:56 PM

Why is that cheap?

I don't want anyone spending more then $20 on my kid, they're kids, they'll break it, lose it or grow out of it.

Quoting msjaxon:

Why are you so cheap? How broke are you guys?

Quoting Anonymous:

we don't even spend that much on family, unless it is my nephew, then I might hit $30.

But I wouldn't get one thing that cost $30, if I spent that much it would be because I got a few things. Our budget for any birthday party is $15-$20 if we really can't find something under $15.


 I don't even know what to get this kid, maybe a gift card to Justice?  I am sure my dd will pick out a doll or a book for her, and I don't think that will float.


Quoting nocalmegan:

Lol I'm laughing at "I'm not spending 30$ on you because you are 10" seriously. Thats a totally reasonable gift price for any age.

But if she's mean to your Dd then make fun plans for that day and tell your Dd you forgot.



Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 11, 2012 at 7:00 PM

As I said, I expect to spend about $15 -20 on a gift.

I am thinking maybe a $20 Justice gift card.

No ten yr old that I know asks for expensive jewelry, the last party we went to for a 9 yr old, the girl asked for a barbie.

My daughter doesn't even know what Alex and Ani is

Quoting nocalmegan:

Right!? Nobody is ever happy anymore tho. If the girl were to request a Wii it would be outrageous. So she asks for a 30$ gift and it's still WAY to much for a present. No 10 year old is going to ask for a 5$ gift. If you cant afford a small amount then don't ask what the kid wants. Just get something cheap and let it be.


Quoting msjaxon:

This. Pandora bracelets are "high end" and the low end of high end lol...



Quoting nocalmegan:

I dont really think anything that's only 30$ to be high end ESP when compared to a coach bag which can be hundreds to a few thousand $$.






Quoting Anonymous:

I just feel like Alex and Ani bracelets are for adults, they are expensive and considered "high-end". Just like it is stupid to get a kid a coach bag




Quoting nocalmegan:

I guess. I still consider it a fair amount. I don't think in reality her request was unreasonable even if for your budget you feel like it was.











Quoting Anonymous:

after taxes it may work out to that much in some places.

Even still, it could be an hr's worth of working, it is still too much for a child's birthday. Unless it is your own child.

For DD's birthday she got my old nook and a $50 giftcard for books for it.




Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 11, 2012 at 7:03 PM

Those bracelets START at $30,  who the hell spends $30 on a freakin bangle?!

Quoting msjaxon:

Calling $30 high end is cheap

Quoting PinkieRed:

How is that cheap?

If one of my kids was going to a birthday party for a friend, I'd spend $20-$25, tops.



I have eleven nieces and nephews on my side of the family alone (and one on the way, as my adult niece is pregnant) and I don't buy them birthday gifts. I can't afford it for that many kids. My husband has 100 something nieces and nephews/second nieces and nephews (he has 15 siblings), so no way could we buy gifts for all of them. My side of the family does a Christmas gift exchange every year, for the under 18 year old kids. Each adult buys for one kid, and we cap it at $20.

I don't think the OP is being cheap at all, especially considering that this girl is not even a close friend of her daughter's.
Quoting msjaxon:

Why are you so cheap? How broke are you guys?

Quoting Anonymous:

we don't even spend that much on family, unless it is my nephew, then I might hit $30.

But I wouldn't get one thing that cost $30, if I spent that much it would be because I got a few things. Our budget for any birthday party is $15-$20 if we really can't find something under $15.


 I don't even know what to get this kid, maybe a gift card to Justice?  I am sure my dd will pick out a doll or a book for her, and I don't think that will float.



Quoting nocalmegan:

Lol I'm laughing at "I'm not spending 30$ on you because you are 10" seriously. Thats a totally reasonable gift price for any age.


But if she's mean to your Dd then make fun plans for that day and tell your Dd you forgot.



hollydaze1974
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 7:08 PM
They are not after more presents. But mom probabaly insisted the whole team be invited. Maybe the private school girls wouldn't be as hard on your daughter if they knew her better....uh, social activities? So don't get a thirty dollar bracelet. Get a ten dollar gift card to a store that sells them.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 11, 2012 at 7:11 PM

Are there any good books out for 10 yr olds?

Most parties we go to are family friends and I try to get something at least a little educational, be it a board game, book, science experiment kit, etc

nocalmegan
by Ruby Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 7:17 PM
You aren't understanding. 30$ isn't expensive. Just because something exceeds your specific budget doesn't make something really expensive. To someone who is in the negative every month 5$ would be expensive but in reality 5$ isnt expensive. Make sense? You could easily spend 30$ on a barbie nowadays. If you couldnt of afforded a normal priced item you shouldn't of had your Dd ask what she wanted ESP since unless it met your low budget you were just gonna complain about these "high end" gifts she's asking for when they aren't, in reality, high end.


Quoting Anonymous:

As I said, I expect to spend about $15 -20 on a gift.

I am thinking maybe a $20 Justice gift card.

No ten yr old that I know asks for expensive jewelry, the last party we went to for a 9 yr old, the girl asked for a barbie.

My daughter doesn't even know what Alex and Ani is


Quoting nocalmegan:

Right!? Nobody is ever happy anymore tho. If the girl were to request a Wii it would be outrageous. So she asks for a 30$ gift and it's still WAY to much for a present. No 10 year old is going to ask for a 5$ gift. If you cant afford a small amount then don't ask what the kid wants. Just get something cheap and let it be.





Quoting msjaxon:

This. Pandora bracelets are "high end" and the low end of high end lol...





Quoting nocalmegan:

I dont really think anything that's only 30$ to be high end ESP when compared to a coach bag which can be hundreds to a few thousand $$.









Quoting Anonymous:

I just feel like Alex and Ani bracelets are for adults, they are expensive and considered "high-end". Just like it is stupid to get a kid a coach bag





Quoting nocalmegan:

I guess. I still consider it a fair amount. I don't think in reality her request was unreasonable even if for your budget you feel like it was.














Quoting Anonymous:

after taxes it may work out to that much in some places.

Even still, it could be an hr's worth of working, it is still too much for a child's birthday. Unless it is your own child.

For DD's birthday she got my old nook and a $50 giftcard for books for it.







Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 11, 2012 at 7:23 PM

First of all, $30 is expensive for one item. A $30 bracelet is much more high end then a $15 watch. I won't even buy a dress for $25 unless it is really fancy.

I didn't have DD ask anything, all of this went down without me knowing, dd took it upon herself to ask, or the girl willingly told her, I don't know.

My inlaws go to the coach outlet and never spend more then $70 on a bag, they bought dd a bag for $40, it is on the top most shelf of closet because she doesn't use it and will just lose it, or get it stolen.

I was expecting something like " this book" or " a barbie" or " this movie" or "monster high"

I would have a stern talking to with my daughter asked someone for something as frivolous as a bracelet that was that expensive.


Also, you can easily find a nice barbie for $20, or a really cool book for $15

Quoting nocalmegan:

You aren't understanding. 30$ isn't expensive. Just because something exceeds your specific budget doesn't make something really expensive. To someone who is in the negative every month 5$ would be expensive but in reality 5$ isnt expensive. Make sense? You could easily spend 30$ on a barbie nowadays. If you couldnt of afforded a normal priced item you shouldn't of had your Dd ask what she wanted ESP since unless it met your low budget you were just gonna complain about these "high end" gifts she's asking for when they aren't, in reality, high end.


Quoting Anonymous:

As I said, I expect to spend about $15 -20 on a gift.

I am thinking maybe a $20 Justice gift card.

No ten yr old that I know asks for expensive jewelry, the last party we went to for a 9 yr old, the girl asked for a barbie.

My daughter doesn't even know what Alex and Ani is


Quoting nocalmegan:

Right!? Nobody is ever happy anymore tho. If the girl were to request a Wii it would be outrageous. So she asks for a 30$ gift and it's still WAY to much for a present. No 10 year old is going to ask for a 5$ gift. If you cant afford a small amount then don't ask what the kid wants. Just get something cheap and let it be.





Quoting msjaxon:

This. Pandora bracelets are "high end" and the low end of high end lol...





Quoting nocalmegan:

I dont really think anything that's only 30$ to be high end ESP when compared to a coach bag which can be hundreds to a few thousand $$.









Quoting Anonymous:

I just feel like Alex and Ani bracelets are for adults, they are expensive and considered "high-end". Just like it is stupid to get a kid a coach bag





Quoting nocalmegan:

I guess. I still consider it a fair amount. I don't think in reality her request was unreasonable even if for your budget you feel like it was.














Quoting Anonymous:

after taxes it may work out to that much in some places.

Even still, it could be an hr's worth of working, it is still too much for a child's birthday. Unless it is your own child.

For DD's birthday she got my old nook and a $50 giftcard for books for it.








nocalmegan
by Ruby Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 7:29 PM
1 mom liked this
I dunno. Sounds like you are just cheap all around. If you don't have the money that's a whole other story, but you haven't mentioned that at all so I'm going to assume that you are just cheap. If that's not the case then please correct me and then I take it back but until then.....


Quoting Anonymous:

First of all, $30 is expensive for one item. A $30 bracelet is much more high end then a $15 watch. I won't even buy a dress for $25 unless it is really fancy.

I didn't have DD ask anything, all of this went down without me knowing, dd took it upon herself to ask, or the girl willingly told her, I don't know.

My inlaws go to the coach outlet and never spend more then $70 on a bag, they bought dd a bag for $40, it is on the top most shelf of closet because she doesn't use it and will just lose it, or get it stolen.

I was expecting something like " this book" or " a barbie" or " this movie" or "monster high"

I would have a stern talking to with my daughter asked someone for something as frivolous as a bracelet that was that expensive.


Also, you can easily find a nice barbie for $20, or a really cool book for $15


Quoting nocalmegan:

You aren't understanding. 30$ isn't expensive. Just because something exceeds your specific budget doesn't make something really expensive. To someone who is in the negative every month 5$ would be expensive but in reality 5$ isnt expensive. Make sense? You could easily spend 30$ on a barbie nowadays. If you couldnt of afforded a normal priced item you shouldn't of had your Dd ask what she wanted ESP since unless it met your low budget you were just gonna complain about these "high end" gifts she's asking for when they aren't, in reality, high end.





Quoting Anonymous:

As I said, I expect to spend about $15 -20 on a gift.

I am thinking maybe a $20 Justice gift card.

No ten yr old that I know asks for expensive jewelry, the last party we went to for a 9 yr old, the girl asked for a barbie.

My daughter doesn't even know what Alex and Ani is



Quoting nocalmegan:

Right!? Nobody is ever happy anymore tho. If the girl were to request a Wii it would be outrageous. So she asks for a 30$ gift and it's still WAY to much for a present. No 10 year old is going to ask for a 5$ gift. If you cant afford a small amount then don't ask what the kid wants. Just get something cheap and let it be.








Quoting msjaxon:

This. Pandora bracelets are "high end" and the low end of high end lol...







Quoting nocalmegan:

I dont really think anything that's only 30$ to be high end ESP when compared to a coach bag which can be hundreds to a few thousand $$.












Quoting Anonymous:

I just feel like Alex and Ani bracelets are for adults, they are expensive and considered "high-end". Just like it is stupid to get a kid a coach bag






Quoting nocalmegan:

I guess. I still consider it a fair amount. I don't think in reality her request was unreasonable even if for your budget you feel like it was.

















Quoting Anonymous:

after taxes it may work out to that much in some places.

Even still, it could be an hr's worth of working, it is still too much for a child's birthday. Unless it is your own child.

For DD's birthday she got my old nook and a $50 giftcard for books for it.












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