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Abortion scheduled -- thinking of keeping.....

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

A couple days ago I found out I"m pregnant after a one night stand. The guy is being great, he's going to help and come with me. We aren't together, I don't think we will be together. I'm in love with someone I will never be with and am working on getting over that.... I have a couple other kids and have been split from my husband for a year or so....but despite child support from my xh sometimes I struggle to make it each month though I can certainly cut back in some areas. This is the right choice, the best choice for me, my family, the baby....


But....part of me, the mom in me, is dying at the thought. What if its my last baby ever and I get rid of it? What if I meet someone and we want to have kids and can't and I always wonder about this one....I don't want to be tied to this guy....I don't want to be that mom that has a handful of kids by different fathers...i hate sharing my kids as it is and this guy would want to be involved....he makes good money but I still can't support another kid....I have a new job I can't take time off from.....I can't afford daycare for another one....but....ther'es always that but. I miss being pregnant, I miss having a baby. I know this is not the time in my life to be doing any of that, I'm young (almost 30) and I have lots of time....but....

Just had to get that off my chest....i haven't told anyone here I am going and I thought some of you might be able to relate, or understand, or have words of advice. PLEASE no abortion debates, that's not what this is about AT ALL. I don't care if you agree or disagree with abortion, I'm just needing to share my internal angst at making the right choice.....

Posted by Anonymous on Oct. 11, 2012 at 6:06 PM
Replies (111-120):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 38 on Oct. 11, 2012 at 9:22 PM
Your words are literally haunting me right now. I had an abortion almost 4 years ago and there isn't a single day I don't wonder if I made the right choice. I knew that was my baby, not just a fetus, I thought of her as my baby. I still do, I still see a little girl and wonder what she would have looked like at that age (for some reason I feel like it was a girl) I have had 3 abortions and only one haunts me, the one I questioned. I COULD have done it but I chose not to... That is something I will live with for the rest of my life. I am in no way trying to tell YOU what to choose for yourself, just sharing from someone who has been there. I wonder if I had the baby, I would regret it every day like I do the abortion. I doubt it...
aimhawk
by Gold Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 9:24 PM
1 mom liked this

I hope that you can come to a decision for yourself that you can be happy with and have no regrets.

Benjamins-mama
by Platinum Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 9:30 PM

that is a tough decision.   I would say I wouldn't get an abortion unless you are 100% sure want it.  

KrissyKC
by Platinum Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 9:38 PM

Actually, I disagree.   I think we should be allowed to voice our opinions.  Today we have every freedom (freedom to kill unborn babies) but we don't have the freedom of speech to say, "hey, I disagree!"

Quoting Anonymous:

Not your place to tell her the right or wrong choice.

Quoting Anonymous:

Its NEVER the right choice to MURDER a baby. It may be the right choice for you but how is it the right choice for the baby? The baby has a right to life just like you and your other children. Have you ever thought of adoption? I am adopted because my mom was in the same position but she was also a teen mom she had me at 16 and in total there are 10 of us ssoo....


Anonymous
by Anonymous 39 on Oct. 11, 2012 at 9:41 PM
1 mom liked this

I am married with two kids and just had one. We could not support another one and the effects on the kids I have would have been devastating. I adore the children I have and truly saw it as choosing the kids I have over the one that might have been. The vast majority of my friends were supportive. One was not. Be careful who you tell. I was devastated at having to make the choice; it made my momma heart ache. I do not regret it and know it was the right choice for me and my family. My husband would have been supportive either way. I was terribly sad afterwards but had to separate grief from regret in my head. You have to make the best decision you can for you and your family. I am sending you a big hug:)

Anonymous
by Anonymous 23 on Oct. 11, 2012 at 9:59 PM
Just because I've been called a whore doesn't make me a whore. The fetus I aborted was the product of my 8 year marriage, my 3rd pregnancy and the decision to abort was mine and my husbands. Not all abortions are by whores! We are now expecting a new addition in 6 months!

Quoting Anonymous:

Quoting Anonymous:




Im so sorry u think of ur self so highly. whore=)
lilypad12788
by Gold Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 10:06 PM
1 mom liked this
I'll keep you in my prayers that you can be 100% with your choice, whichever choice you make. I'd seek counseling either way, though, if I were you, abortion, adoption, keeping your baby, or giving the baby to its father. It's a stressful time, and looking after yourself is a good idea.
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ChutterButter
by Bronze Member on Oct. 11, 2012 at 10:34 PM
1 mom liked this

Another peace and love to you momma! You are the only one who knows what is best for you and your family.

carterscutie85
by Queen Bee on Oct. 11, 2012 at 10:37 PM

If you are positive the guy would help maybe you could arrange something with him so that you could afford the daycare, etc for this baby. Maybe even his family could watch the baby for cheap.

I wouldn't do it unless I was 100% certain.

momma0ffive
by on Oct. 11, 2012 at 10:37 PM
if you're doubting your self now, imagine how you will feel when you can't "change your mind"
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