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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

EDIT! My sister had a stroke, I am worried because she says she does not like Doctors and thinks they are quacks so now what?

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

My mom constantly calls and tells me I should be more like my sister who runs like 3 miles a day, works 70 hours a week (she is not married and does not have kids tho, has a bf tho, never wants kids) and she does not take any medications for anxiety, she says they are all bad and horrid for you! Well I am overweight and she calls my mom daily and tells my mom I'm gonna die (and my mom is a worry wart so this is bs of her to do) she tells my mom its bad that I take xanax and temazapam I take in the evenings, that I should deal with having anxiety, these drugs will kill me! And she complains me being a mother and in college isn't enough I should work harder like her and have multiple jobs. Well now she had a minor stroke. Guess who I am not taking health advice from???? I am glad she is okay, but she seriously called my mom yesterday bitching that xanax is evil still because my mom is starting it. Umm maybe if she would not work so hard and admit she had some anxiety issues she wouldn't have had a stroke. I understand she thinks she is perfect because she works so hard, but she needs to take it easy, and she is giving my mom bad advice. I said to my mom today, umm she had a minor stroke last week! Who are you gonna listen to? Your Dr, and someone who has taken the medicine as needed for years or someone who obviously has too much stress? My mom filled her script. Thank god. Please everyone pray for my sister her name is Tanya that she sees the light and stops overworking before she has a MAJOR stroke. I don't know why she thinks she has to be perfect and everyone else does...its so sad.

EDIT---THE MAJOR REASON I am worried is she is the type of person she says she knows better than Doctors. She has been saying this for years. If she is not gonna take their advice, or who knows what then she could have a major stroke. Anyone thinking this post was about sibling resentment, well you misunderstood. I just don't want her giving my sick mother advice (my mom is unhealthy, mentally, and is starting to have some physical issues) I want my mom to TRUST Doctors. And I really feel like it's a bad thing that my sister will not listen to Doctors. Like I said BEFORE PLEASE keep her in your thoughts and prayers, and my mother too. Neither of them are doing well, and I wish for them BOTH to be healthy, and trust their Doctor.

Let me add...my sister teaches BALLET. She has been in BALLET her whole life, she still does some Ballets which she struggles with at her age still getting into some, but it is her passion, and she is naturally not stick thin. Everyone knows that Ballet has a reputation for making women feel bad about their bodies if they don't live up to a certain standard. My sister is always on a diet when I see her despite the fact she works out like a mad woman. I think it is time for a talk. Thank you everyone who sent warm wishes.

Posted by Anonymous on Oct. 12, 2012 at 11:47 PM
Replies (21-30):
chairhead28
by Gold Member on Oct. 13, 2012 at 12:43 AM
Quoting Anonymous:


Yes, it can. I have suffered from anorexia purge type (I do not binge like a bulimic, but do purge everything I eat. Whether that be an apple or ice chips...) and I have been in cardiac arrest almost four times, my potassium has been 1.0, I have permenant damage to my body.

When you starve yourself or purge, it messes up all the vitamins, organs, hormones, fat cells, muscle tissue, etc. in your body... If your sister has been engaging in ED habits, more than likely, that can cause a stroke.

You also mentioned your mother had/has anorexia. EDs are hereditary...might be something worth looking into. Also, not all people with EDs look a specific way, that is how a lot of EDs go unnoticed because people assume they should look a certain way.

Best wishes.
lovinglife0682
by on Oct. 13, 2012 at 12:43 AM
Wow, how scary. But I really do not think working 70 hours a week is really that much.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 13, 2012 at 12:44 AM

Well I guess you are right, she has thought she has been my Dr the last several years, she calls and tells me what to do since she is a massage therapist she is qualified to tell me what to take and what not to over my Dr. She thinks because she slightly studied the body she shouldn't listen to any Doctors, she told my mom and I both Doctors are quacks. So no matter what her Doctor tells her, I don't know if she will even listen. I just pray she does.

Quoting 702girly:

ummm obviously you are not a doctor. You have no idea what caused her stroke.

Quoting Anonymous:

umm she had a stroke. Obviously she is working too hard.

Quoting 702girly:

She need a wake up call because she's too healthy and productive?

eye rolling




702girly
by Gold Member on Oct. 13, 2012 at 12:45 AM

I really doubt her doctors will tell her to stop exercising or stop working.

Quoting Anonymous:

Well I guess you are right, she has thought she has been my Dr the last several years, she calls and tells me what to do since she is a massage therapist she is qualified to tell me what to take and what not to over my Dr. She thinks because she slightly studied the body she shouldn't listen to any Doctors, she told my mom and I both Doctors are quacks. So no matter what her Doctor tells her, I don't know if she will even listen. I just pray she does.

Quoting 702girly:

ummm obviously you are not a doctor. You have no idea what caused her stroke.

Quoting Anonymous:

umm she had a stroke. Obviously she is working too hard.

Quoting 702girly:

She need a wake up call because she's too healthy and productive?

eye rolling





Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 13, 2012 at 12:46 AM

It is when they are both REALLY physical jobs. One job she is a massage therapist, the other she is a dancer/ dance teacher. And I should say 70-80 it depends on if a production is coming up sometimes it goes up to 80. I mean she runs the 3 miles in the morning and then she still teaches dance class each night. It just seems like a lot, like she is killing herself. I never thought of it like a disorder like another poster mentioned, but isn't a form of anorexia when you exercise yourself to death?

Quoting lovinglife0682:

Wow, how scary. But I really do not think working 70 hours a week is really that much.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 13, 2012 at 12:49 AM

Both of her jobs are active, massage therapist you don't exactly not use your muscles. But I suppose you could say that is the more relaxing of the two, but then she spends another 30 to 40 hours a week teaching dance class, when she runs 3 miles in the morning, I think she is over doing it. Just like I listened to her and I am eating smaller meals, I am exercising, and incorporating it into my routine, and counting calories, I think she should do the reverse. I am honestly worried she is OVER doing it. If you don't eat enough and burn tons and tons of calories can't that kill you?

Quoting 702girly:

I really doubt her doctors will tell her to stop exercising or stop working.

Quoting Anonymous:

Well I guess you are right, she has thought she has been my Dr the last several years, she calls and tells me what to do since she is a massage therapist she is qualified to tell me what to take and what not to over my Dr. She thinks because she slightly studied the body she shouldn't listen to any Doctors, she told my mom and I both Doctors are quacks. So no matter what her Doctor tells her, I don't know if she will even listen. I just pray she does.

Quoting 702girly:

ummm obviously you are not a doctor. You have no idea what caused her stroke.

Quoting Anonymous:

umm she had a stroke. Obviously she is working too hard.

Quoting 702girly:

She need a wake up call because she's too healthy and productive?

eye rolling






OneToughMami
by Ruby Member on Oct. 13, 2012 at 12:49 AM

And that is your opinion on the matter. She's an adult and is going to do whatever she chooses. Trust me.

Quoting Anonymous:

I think at the very least she needs to cut back at work, I mean she is working a fulltime job, and she is a dance teacher which is another fulltime job. She can't keep doing this to herself with her personality, she is just as nervous as I am, and I don't even have as much on my plate as her which is why I take a pill when I am stressed. I know it can happen to anyone. Honestly I am scared because I DO take hormonal BC. And my sister doesn't, I know that raises my chances. I am overweight I worry more about heart problems down the line, but these 50 extra lbs I've been dieting slowly, I make smaller meals, I take the stairs at school, I park far away, I am making slow changes. I am slowly taking it off.

Quoting OneToughMami:

Well, you could have a stroke as well. I mean, my grandmother was sitting on her couch in the middle of making spaghetti when she had her stroke. My cousin's mother was delivering food to her patients when she had her stroke. A stroke can happen to anyone.

She is probably better off without the anti-anxiety medications. Medications for the most part tend to be worse for you than the actual illness you have.




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OneToughMami
by Ruby Member on Oct. 13, 2012 at 12:51 AM
1 mom liked this

They would only tell her that if it is clearly causing a health problem. But that seems rare otherwise a large percentage of America would be sitting on the couch...I mean a larger percentage.

Quoting 702girly:

I really doubt her doctors will tell her to stop exercising or stop working.

Quoting Anonymous:

Well I guess you are right, she has thought she has been my Dr the last several years, she calls and tells me what to do since she is a massage therapist she is qualified to tell me what to take and what not to over my Dr. She thinks because she slightly studied the body she shouldn't listen to any Doctors, she told my mom and I both Doctors are quacks. So no matter what her Doctor tells her, I don't know if she will even listen. I just pray she does.

Quoting 702girly:

ummm obviously you are not a doctor. You have no idea what caused her stroke.

Quoting Anonymous:

umm she had a stroke. Obviously she is working too hard.

Quoting 702girly:

She need a wake up call because she's too healthy and productive?

eye rolling






      Ask me about SoyLicious Candles!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 13, 2012 at 12:52 AM

I didn't see exactly which quote you quoted but could she be having an ED by over exercising, and eating but not eating enough? I mean she has to know that working out as much as she does and then having a job that she works out another 3 hours at night is taking a lot of calories, and I don't see her eat a lot to make it up. I mean for how much exercising she is doing she should be eating more on a daily basis I would think

Quoting chairhead28:

Quoting Anonymous:


Yes, it can. I have suffered from anorexia purge type (I do not binge like a bulimic, but do purge everything I eat. Whether that be an apple or ice chips...) and I have been in cardiac arrest almost four times, my potassium has been 1.0, I have permenant damage to my body.

When you starve yourself or purge, it messes up all the vitamins, organs, hormones, fat cells, muscle tissue, etc. in your body... If your sister has been engaging in ED habits, more than likely, that can cause a stroke.

You also mentioned your mother had/has anorexia. EDs are hereditary...might be something worth looking into. Also, not all people with EDs look a specific way, that is how a lot of EDs go unnoticed because people assume they should look a certain way.

Best wishes.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 13, 2012 at 12:56 AM

Hey I recognize I am not perfect thus I am making changes in my diet, and I have incorporated exercise into my routine slowly. I need to take off 50 lbs. Obviously I am not perfect, I have an anxiety disorder. That is the definition of imperfect.

Quoting ashellbell:

You sound like you have some issues you need to work on.


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