So I guess I have an anger problem. I usually hold it in and then blow up. Well yesterday, I blew up. I usually throw things and scream and cry and last time I even slapped my dh in the face and got a punch in the head in return. well, I realized I was about to bow up and I could not stop it, I wanted to throw everything and scream but I decided to hurt myself instead of the usual. I clawed the shit out of both my forearms. They bled and they hurt like a bitch. Then I thought about drinking bleach and other chemicals, stabbing myself, banging my head into concrete, go for a drive and run into something. I told dh about these thoughts and he laughed at me like I was joking. I almost called the cops on myself so they could take me to get help.