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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

I can't believe I'm admitting this :(

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
My confession is when my baby was born I never had that overwhelming love for him. I had an emergency c/s I was so drowsy on drugs. The first time I saw him I just said "oh" I just saw another baby, he didn't feel like mine. I felt even worse when i saw SO crying. he was so in love and i wanted so bad to feel that.I never had ppd though I had the baby blues for about 3 days until he actually slept 6 hours straight. He's 6 months now and I have grown to love him very much. He makes me happy. I still don't feel like I have that connection other moms have with their kids though. I think once he's more independent I might. I just feel like such a failure of a mother. I would do anything for my son but I'm still quite selfish and I hate it. I just want that overwhelming love everyone seems to have.
That's my confession :/
Posted by Anonymous on Oct. 13, 2012 at 3:17 PM
Replies (41-50):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 12 on Oct. 13, 2012 at 4:34 PM
Try not having that feeling with one kid and having that feeling with the next kid.
Momniscient
by Ruby Member on Oct. 13, 2012 at 4:37 PM
Our bodies are designed to birth babies. Our emotions are influenced by environmental factors. Which c sections, yes, are a part of.

C sections are desirable if that is how it all works out. It is silly to tell women that they are 'designed' to have an instant devotion to a new baby.


Quoting Blue_Spiral:


You may be right to an extent, that we can't judge what every woman will feel, but our bodies are designed to have that feeling and it is abnormal when it's not present at all.

That's one of a list of reasons why c-sections are not a desirable thing.

Quoting Momniscient:

I think it is silly to expect women to have that outward immediate tangible devotion to a baby.

Pregnancy wreaks havoc on emotions and giving birth is overwhelming to some. Why would we expect that we would immediately have a movie moment over this little dependent screaming being at the moment of birth?

I had an abstract devotion to my daughter but like anyone else, I have grown to love her in ways I never thought possible as I've gotten to know her. I think our expectations are too high about that whole instant rainbows and unicorns feeling at birth.


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Blue_Spiral
by Gold Member on Oct. 13, 2012 at 4:42 PM


Emotions are influenced by outside factors, but the intense automatic devotion and favoritism towards ones own baby is given to us through hormones. That is part of the process of becoming a mother. The body literally makes us love our babies.

Quoting Momniscient:

Our bodies are designed to birth babies. Our emotions are influenced by environmental factors. Which c sections, yes, are a part of.

C sections are desirable if that is how it all works out. It is silly to tell women that they are 'designed' to have an instant devotion to a new baby.


Quoting Blue_Spiral:


You may be right to an extent, that we can't judge what every woman will feel, but our bodies are designed to have that feeling and it is abnormal when it's not present at all.

That's one of a list of reasons why c-sections are not a desirable thing.

Quoting Momniscient:

I think it is silly to expect women to have that outward immediate tangible devotion to a baby.

Pregnancy wreaks havoc on emotions and giving birth is overwhelming to some. Why would we expect that we would immediately have a movie moment over this little dependent screaming being at the moment of birth?

I had an abstract devotion to my daughter but like anyone else, I have grown to love her in ways I never thought possible as I've gotten to know her. I think our expectations are too high about that whole instant rainbows and unicorns feeling at birth.



Momniscient
by Ruby Member on Oct. 13, 2012 at 4:43 PM
Lol

Quoting Blue_Spiral:


Emotions are influenced by outside factors, but the intense automatic devotion and favoritism towards ones own baby is given to us through hormones. That is part of the process of becoming a mother. The body literally makes us love our babies.

Quoting Momniscient:

Our bodies are designed to birth babies. Our emotions are influenced by environmental factors. Which c sections, yes, are a part of.



C sections are desirable if that is how it all works out. It is silly to tell women that they are 'designed' to have an instant devotion to a new baby.




Quoting Blue_Spiral:


You may be right to an extent, that we can't judge what every woman will feel, but our bodies are designed to have that feeling and it is abnormal when it's not present at all.

That's one of a list of reasons why c-sections are not a desirable thing.

Quoting Momniscient:

I think it is silly to expect women to have that outward immediate tangible devotion to a baby.

Pregnancy wreaks havoc on emotions and giving birth is overwhelming to some. Why would we expect that we would immediately have a movie moment over this little dependent screaming being at the moment of birth?

I had an abstract devotion to my daughter but like anyone else, I have grown to love her in ways I never thought possible as I've gotten to know her. I think our expectations are too high about that whole instant rainbows and unicorns feeling at birth.



Posted on CafeMom Mobile
MrsFlores_2006
by on Oct. 13, 2012 at 4:47 PM
:/ sorry my CS wasn't like that. They took my dd away and i didn't see her till after i woke up in my room.




Quoting Anonymous:

How would he get switched? It's not like the olden days when they had nurseries now those are creepy. After my c/s they put him on my bed and wheeled me back to my room where he never once left.




Quoting MrsFlores_2006:

Maybe he got switch and nobody noticed...


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Blue_Spiral
by Gold Member on Oct. 13, 2012 at 4:48 PM


What's funny? Do you think I'm making this up?

Do you understand what hormones are?

Quoting Momniscient:

Lol

Quoting Blue_Spiral:


Emotions are influenced by outside factors, but the intense automatic devotion and favoritism towards ones own baby is given to us through hormones. That is part of the process of becoming a mother. The body literally makes us love our babies.

Quoting Momniscient:

Our bodies are designed to birth babies. Our emotions are influenced by environmental factors. Which c sections, yes, are a part of.



C sections are desirable if that is how it all works out. It is silly to tell women that they are 'designed' to have an instant devotion to a new baby.




Quoting Blue_Spiral:


You may be right to an extent, that we can't judge what every woman will feel, but our bodies are designed to have that feeling and it is abnormal when it's not present at all.

That's one of a list of reasons why c-sections are not a desirable thing.

Quoting Momniscient:

I think it is silly to expect women to have that outward immediate tangible devotion to a baby.

Pregnancy wreaks havoc on emotions and giving birth is overwhelming to some. Why would we expect that we would immediately have a movie moment over this little dependent screaming being at the moment of birth?

I had an abstract devotion to my daughter but like anyone else, I have grown to love her in ways I never thought possible as I've gotten to know her. I think our expectations are too high about that whole instant rainbows and unicorns feeling at birth.




Anonymous
by Anonymous 13 on Oct. 13, 2012 at 4:48 PM
Can't relate but i delivered naturally.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Oct. 13, 2012 at 4:49 PM

THIS

Quoting Anonymous:

I promise you, you're not the only one.  In fact, this isn't unusual at all.  Don't worry, you'll build that connection.  


Momniscient
by Ruby Member on Oct. 13, 2012 at 4:51 PM
Lol

Quoting Blue_Spiral:


What's funny? Do you think I'm making this up?

Do you understand what hormones are?

Quoting Momniscient:

Lol



Quoting Blue_Spiral:


Emotions are influenced by outside factors, but the intense automatic devotion and favoritism towards ones own baby is given to us through hormones. That is part of the process of becoming a mother. The body literally makes us love our babies.

Quoting Momniscient:

Our bodies are designed to birth babies. Our emotions are influenced by environmental factors. Which c sections, yes, are a part of.





C sections are desirable if that is how it all works out. It is silly to tell women that they are 'designed' to have an instant devotion to a new baby.






Quoting Blue_Spiral:


You may be right to an extent, that we can't judge what every woman will feel, but our bodies are designed to have that feeling and it is abnormal when it's not present at all.

That's one of a list of reasons why c-sections are not a desirable thing.

Quoting Momniscient:

I think it is silly to expect women to have that outward immediate tangible devotion to a baby.

Pregnancy wreaks havoc on emotions and giving birth is overwhelming to some. Why would we expect that we would immediately have a movie moment over this little dependent screaming being at the moment of birth?

I had an abstract devotion to my daughter but like anyone else, I have grown to love her in ways I never thought possible as I've gotten to know her. I think our expectations are too high about that whole instant rainbows and unicorns feeling at birth.




Posted on CafeMom Mobile
blue_elephant
by on Oct. 13, 2012 at 4:54 PM
I had that same problem with my now 5 year old but the circumstances under which he was conceived had a lot to do with that. His father raped me, and when I learned I was pregnant I wanted an abortion and his father told me if I killed his child he would kill me, and I had just had a baby 8 weeks prior to this conversation. I hate that I felt the way I did but I love him now with all my heart and that's all that really matters...
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