Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

A friend's SO did this and she is ok with it, would you be ok with it?

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

I have a friend who I have know for 2 years, one day she and her SO showed up at my kid's school for a play. I knew she had step children who went to the school, what I didn't know is that the step children's mother is NOT her DH's ex, she is legally, still his wife I figured that out when the wife introduced herself as "his wife". Later that night my friend called and explained everything to me. She (the wife) is Catholic and refuses to get divorced, even when her DH asked her for one. They struck a deal that he wouldn't have to pay child support or alimony for any of their 3 kids, which would be a substantial amount if they didn't get divorced. They both go to the same church and at church, his wife is his wife, my friend and her kids can't even go to church with him. At his family gatherings, his family and the wife's  family treat them like they are still married (yes, everyone knows about my friend and the 2 kids he has with her), my friend doesn't even go to them. I can't imagine living like this, they can't ever get legally married, in most peoples eyes, she is the other woman. I asked her why she would go along with this and she said it's because she "loves him". Would you go along with this?

Posted by Anonymous on Oct. 14, 2012 at 8:12 AM
Replies (291-300):
by Bronze Member on Oct. 15, 2012 at 4:29 AM


Do you love to bake? Join my team! Host an online party! All natural and
SOO yummy! or contact me! ~Happy baking~

by Ruby Member on Oct. 15, 2012 at 5:37 AM

No way.

by Ruby Member on Oct. 15, 2012 at 5:40 AM
No. Not getting a divorce is one thing, but she is even treated like the other woman. No family functions, no gatherings. Her man needs to grow some balls.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by Gold Member on Oct. 15, 2012 at 5:50 AM

Well if they're still married then they are committing adultery... that's a sin, not sure if it is in catholic's eyes but I've never been the one to proclaim how right they are either, since I do not feel they are in many things they do.

by Ruby Member on Oct. 15, 2012 at 7:09 AM


by on Oct. 15, 2012 at 7:13 AM
My moms bf has sort of this arrangement with his wife but for different reasons. He is very well off and she has major medical issues so legally they are married still so she can benefit from his medical insurances and such but they live in different cities and date other people. Mom knows about all this and thinks of him as a wonderful man for doing such a thing. He has made my mother so incredibly happy and the reasons behind it are honorable . I think after my parents divorce my mom never wants to marry again anyways.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by Platinum Member on Oct. 15, 2012 at 7:14 AM
Not a chance in hell.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by Platinum Member on Oct. 15, 2012 at 7:25 AM

No. I wouldn't even date a man in that situation, and I sure as hell wouldn't have kids with him. 

by Anonymous 40 on Oct. 15, 2012 at 7:27 AM

Hell no.  It sounds like some shadiness!

by Anonymous 41 on Oct. 15, 2012 at 7:39 AM
Quoting Anonymous:

Thou shall not commit adultery ...... That is seen worse than divorce in the Catholic Church..or atleast in mine lol
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)