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question for moms who have remarried..

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 8 Replies

My kids father is not in their lives and hasnt been in years. im getting married in November and my fiance and I have been living together for about 8 months now. At what point, if at all, would you allow the new husband to help with disciplining the kids? I dont mean spanking, we dont spank. I think he feels weird disciplining them since they are not his kids and im not sure how to go about it. I have three kids and some days its just total chaos and I NEED help with them. He doesn't have any children of his own, so this is also a very new thing to him that he's never done before. 

Posted by Anonymous on Oct. 15, 2012 at 9:12 AM
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Replies (1-8):
jsjammerz
by Bronze Member on Oct. 15, 2012 at 9:19 AM
I haven't remarried bit I've been with my bf for three years. He felt the same way, but he started slow. First, it was him telling the kids not to do something, then time outs and finally toys being taken away. Your df will eventually grow to be comfortable with it
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usmcwifey11
by Platinum Member on Oct. 15, 2012 at 9:21 AM
DH is DD's stepfather, he disciplines her. If he didn't then she would walk all over him when I'm not here. It was probably a few months after we got married that he would discipline her. She's 3.
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hautemama83
by Emerald Member on Oct. 15, 2012 at 9:22 AM
Dh has always been part of disciplining dd, from the time we moved in together.
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cLanief
by on Oct. 15, 2012 at 9:24 AM
not remarried but been with my so for 2 years. After a couple months he made rules for my son while in his house. If my son broke a rule then my so would put him in time out or take tv or video games at his house away.. He would deal with it since it was his house. Now he will occasionally help enforce my house rules if im busy doing something else.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Oct. 15, 2012 at 9:24 AM

 From a step mom It needs to start as soon as you move in together the kids need to see the other "parent" as another "parent" from the start. I can tell ou as a child from divorce if you don't it is very very hard for the kids to see the other person as anything but mommy or daddys new wife/husband and they wont respect them.

ladyraven16
by Gold Member on Oct. 15, 2012 at 9:25 AM
I'm not married yet but my SO of 2yrs just recently started handing down discipline. He hasn't done a timeout yet but he does tell them no and takes toys that they are throwing.
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malissaL
by Platinum Member on Oct. 15, 2012 at 9:26 AM

this

Quoting hautemama83:

Dh has always been part of disciplining dd, from the time we moved in together.


Its my body and I'll do what I want to.

LyndseyBlake980
by on Oct. 15, 2012 at 9:29 AM

my older boys father passed so kinda in the same boat meaning bio dad not in the pciture.. but when me and my hubby started dating he started parenting i didnt ask him to he just took the roll on. my boys dad had a group of friends my husband included that at michaels funeral these friends (also my friends) promised my son and the one in belly that they would be taken care of always and my husband was my friend for a long time i was pregnant with my middle baby and couldnt pick up my oldest so he did so much i never asked for them to he wanted to because he loves the boys and thinks of them as his own

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