How do you feel about your scar honestly??
I was told I was full previa. My placenta slightly moved with every passing day, so there was a chance I could deliver vaginally, but maybe not. So I spent some time looking at and touching my smooth flawless belly and trying to imagine a scar there. Then I tried to imagine getting cut, (I have never had any sort of surgery before) and what if my infant gets injured????
Then I got nervous as my date approached. I talked to my man and kids about it and they felt nervous as well but I assured them that it was a common procedure and Mommy will be ok, (even though I wasnt really sure myself). Then I went in to deliver and they gave me the thumbs up for vaginal. My water broke on Fri, but Katya didnt come out til Tue. I was in full labor overnight and the next day I started bleeding a LOT. Placenta ripping from the wall, they gotta do a c-section NOW.
Now everythings flying all over the place, hospital gowns, blue disposal towels, IV's, doctors (I had three, and they were AMAZING. I couldnt thank them enough), nurses, wheelchair, I'm getting strapped down. I told them as I left the labor room to "Please clean up the blood, I cant have my people seeing all of that." Found out later that they didnt and my Mom walked in saw the bloody bed, Nurse telling her I went in for an emergency C. My man, Mom, and three kids. My sweet loving family = worried sick.
I'm lying there, no time for a short prayer, I'm thinking about My man, My mom, the three little loves, my unborn. Now theyre smashing a mask into my face telling me to go to sleep.
Fast forward: I think I am completely fascinated with my scar. It is sensitive sometimes, numb at times, itchy at times. But what really fascinates me is the fact that I was CUT OPEN. I still cant get over it and they reached in and pulled out a most perfect tiny girl. The scar is bikini line, barely there, when I touch it, it feels like theres a sturdy chord or wire across it. When I push it, my man and I both feel it. What is that? Scar tissue? I dont know, I feel it but cant see it. When he pours peroxide on it and rubs over and beneath it it feel SO good. Relaxing.
I can see myself in my bikini next summer. Showing it off. I am proud of it. It saved my daughters life. Special thanks to Dr. Wiggins and Young and Sharah, you guys ROCK!!!!!!
MIA OF TALAMASCA