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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

I don't understand why they're letting her bleed to death... *ETA*

My aunt has had an almost continuous AF for three years (she'll bleed for about three weeks, then stop for about a week, then it starts over)- it wasn't as bad the first year but started getting worse last year.
Her doc said the only way to fix it is to remove her ovaries.
The hospital cost is $29,000, which doesn't include the doctor fees, and numerous hospital fees (tools, anesthesia, etc.).
She is now anemic, has very low iron, and faints more often.
She has no medical insurance and can't afford any. Her and my uncle filed for bankruptcy last year and are still trying to build their lives back up while also trying to get two kids through college.
The hospital told her she would have to make a downpayment before they'd do the surgery, but my aunt can't even afford that upfront cost.
They told her to get on Medicaid and let the government pay for it, but my uncle makes "too much money" for her to use that option.
Isn't there another option that doesn't require my aunt to slowly bleed to death?
I don't understand the ideology behind not helping those who need important medical services.

*ETA* Thank you ladies for all of your ideas. I have passed all of them on to my aunt. I will continue to pester her with these ideas until she realizes that she has to put her health first.
  I know that some of you think she is "martyring" herself and many of you think she is doing it to herself, but she is one of the kindest people I know, and no matter how many times her kids screw up or her husband thinks of himself before her, she continues to love them and keep their interests ahead of her own. That's probably causing all of her problems, but she doesn't know any other way to be.

by on Nov. 7, 2012 at 6:43 PM
Replies (131-138):
jean_marie1987
by on Nov. 7, 2012 at 9:36 PM
Unfortunately, I have no more information.


Quoting Hannahluvsdogs:

They can't just not cover doctor-ordered surgery. I used to work for a health insurance company. With more info I can tell you if there's a way to fight them to cover this.

Quoting jean_marie1987:

She doesn't have any of her own. Since her husband's policy doesn't seem to cover everything I didn't count it, but a PP asked if she was on his.





Quoting Hannahluvsdogs:

In your OP you said she has no medical insurance. Now you're saying she's on her husband's insurance policy. Which is it?

Quoting jean_marie1987:

No, her family is more important than her life, even if they are ungrateful.


Her husband's job's insurance also refuses to pay for the surgery even though my aunt is covered on his policy.


She has spoken with the hospital, but they won't work with her.


She's even tried Medicaid, but they can't help her.


She didn't know the first year that it was a severe medical issue until it started getting worse.


Her doc has already discussed different options with her, but they all end with her needing a hysterectomy, which she can't afford.


College payments aren't expensive for her because she only has to cover what grants, scholarships, and student loans don't cover, which is considerably less than hospital bills.


She still has two younger children to care for at home, so saving isn't happening easily, especially after having to file bankruptcy.








Quoting Roxygurl:

Look she has options but choses instead to pay for college. The other option was to divorce her husband and she doesn't want to do that. She has options but she instead wants to play the poor pitiful me take pity on me because I refuse to help myself.







I felt sorry for her until I read that she does indeed have options but choses not to utilize them. Now I just feel like she's making some really stupid mistakes that will end up costing her life but apparently her pride is more important that her life.








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Anonymous
by Anonymous 28 on Nov. 7, 2012 at 9:38 PM
Wow has she tried ibuprophen? Maybe she could put out those change jars they have at businesses and do an online paypal charity thing?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 29 on Nov. 7, 2012 at 9:40 PM
Please explain how forcing people to have insurance will help. Op just said, they can't afford it.

Quoting silverdawn99:

because this is why obamacare was passed

she has to pay the hospital

Anonymous
by Anonymous 29 on Nov. 7, 2012 at 9:41 PM
Skeptical eyes....

Quoting jean_marie1987:

Unfortunately, I have no more information.




Quoting Hannahluvsdogs:

They can't just not cover doctor-ordered surgery. I used to work for a health insurance company. With more info I can tell you if there's a way to fight them to cover this.

Quoting jean_marie1987:

She doesn't have any of her own. Since her husband's policy doesn't seem to cover everything I didn't count it, but a PP asked if she was on his.








Quoting Hannahluvsdogs:

In your OP you said she has no medical insurance. Now you're saying she's on her husband's insurance policy. Which is it?

Quoting jean_marie1987:

No, her family is more important than her life, even if they are ungrateful.



Her husband's job's insurance also refuses to pay for the surgery even though my aunt is covered on his policy.



She has spoken with the hospital, but they won't work with her.



She's even tried Medicaid, but they can't help her.



She didn't know the first year that it was a severe medical issue until it started getting worse.



Her doc has already discussed different options with her, but they all end with her needing a hysterectomy, which she can't afford.



College payments aren't expensive for her because she only has to cover what grants, scholarships, and student loans don't cover, which is considerably less than hospital bills.



She still has two younger children to care for at home, so saving isn't happening easily, especially after having to file bankruptcy.











Quoting Roxygurl:

Look she has options but choses instead to pay for college. The other option was to divorce her husband and she doesn't want to do that. She has options but she instead wants to play the poor pitiful me take pity on me because I refuse to help myself.









I felt sorry for her until I read that she does indeed have options but choses not to utilize them. Now I just feel like she's making some really stupid mistakes that will end up costing her life but apparently her pride is more important that her life.










Anonymous
by Anonymous 30 on Nov. 7, 2012 at 9:45 PM
This . It's a choice . But obamacare is here so she could get insurance

Quoting Anonymous:

So then it's no one else but herself letting her die. She's chosing to care for others than pay for her surgery.

Quoting jean_marie1987:

She has always put her family before herself.





Quoting 1likeme:

I see your point but why is she paying for two adults to attend college while she is slowly deteriorating. Her health is a higher priority than college tuition.



Anonymous
by Anonymous 31 on Nov. 7, 2012 at 10:20 PM

That's so sad  :(

Anonymous
by Anonymous 32 on Nov. 7, 2012 at 11:09 PM
Its going to cost more and have worse coverage, higher copays...ect than the private insurance we offer with our business. Obamacare is a joke.

Quoting Anonymous:

This . It's a choice . But obamacare is here so she could get insurance



Quoting Anonymous:

So then it's no one else but herself letting her die. She's chosing to care for others than pay for her surgery.

Quoting jean_marie1987:

She has always put her family before herself.








Quoting 1likeme:

I see your point but why is she paying for two adults to attend college while she is slowly deteriorating. Her health is a higher priority than college tuition.




jean_marie1987
by on Nov. 8, 2012 at 8:07 AM

True, but you still have to pay for it, don't  you?

Quoting Anonymous:

This . It's a choice . But obamacare is here so she could get insurance

Quoting Anonymous:

So then it's no one else but herself letting her die. She's chosing to care for others than pay for her surgery.

Quoting jean_marie1987:

She has always put her family before herself.





Quoting 1likeme:

I see your point but why is she paying for two adults to attend college while she is slowly deteriorating. Her health is a higher priority than college tuition.




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