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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

i need advice...how long could you stay in this marriage?

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
So I read another post asking how involved is your husband.
A lot of the women said 50/50
well I'll say like 25% of the time he helps but I really have to force him to help. If I ask him to change a diaper I have to get the diaper and wipes and take my son to him. I could just change it myself!!!! He doesn't clean or discipline the kids but man can he ignore them and tune into that tv. He works but it seems like he takes advantage of me because of it. He forces me to hand wash and line dry the clothes and that pissed me off. He would rather put the extra money into football polls than give me the money for laundry. He forces me to beg for diapers because he's careless with the bills and money. My name is so in debt because of him. Tomorrow he has to be to work early so I have to stay up til 4 am to wake him up because hes afraid he will over sleep.

**Anyway with all that he does would you leave this man? Or can you relate? How long would you work on a marriage like this before you called it quits? I don't work so I feel stuck! I will be leaving but I just wonder how long you personally could stay in this marriage and how long you would "try"? I want to feel like I have done everything I can to make it work.

More info in first reply
Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 14, 2012 at 2:48 AM
Replies (51-60):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 8 on Nov. 14, 2012 at 6:54 AM

i'd go to a shelter before i allowed myself and kids to be treated like that

Anonymous
by Anonymous 8 on Nov. 14, 2012 at 6:55 AM

your husband sounds like the epitome of a douchebag....get a job, and GET OUT OF THERE, before he warps your kid's minds too...

Spfldmomof2
by Kimberly on Nov. 14, 2012 at 7:04 AM

Could you try a strike? Like not do anything for him at all?  Don't cook for him, no laundry for him, no picking up after him.  It might work.  Good luck, Hun!good luck

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Nov. 14, 2012 at 2:14 PM
Forcing me by giving me no other choice. When he tells me whoops I spent all the money guess you will have to hand wash another 2 weeks. And he always says he will help but his excuse for everything is that he worked all day.


Quoting notjstasocermom:

how does he force you to hand wash something? and i see nothing wrong with hang drying something. 

anyway no i would not leave him i would communicate what i need, and i mean talk not nag. most men don't help out more cause their wives are bitchy. try being nice.


rgba
by Ruby Member on Nov. 14, 2012 at 2:16 PM
it depends...what do you mean by "he forces you"?

I think at the very least, you need to get yourself to therapy.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Nov. 14, 2012 at 2:18 PM
I've tried. The house has to be seriously disgusting for him to help. When he does help he is an asshole to everyone. Th last time he helped he shoved about half of the house into the closet and wouldnt let the kids play with anything cause they were making a mess



Quoting Spfldmomof2:

Could you try a strike? Like not do anything for him at all?  Don't cook for him, no laundry for him, no picking up after him.  It might work.  Good luck, Hun!good luck



Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Nov. 14, 2012 at 2:20 PM
Forcing me by giving me no other choice. When he tells me whoops I spent all the money guess you will have to hand wash another 2 weeks. And he always says he will help but his excuse for everything is that he worked all day.


Quoting rgba:

it depends...what do you mean by "he forces you"?



I think at the very least, you need to get yourself to therapy.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 9 on Nov. 14, 2012 at 2:21 PM
I'm sorry you are dealing with this.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 10 on Nov. 14, 2012 at 2:23 PM
Honestly it seems like his family comes second. I would take a break. My situation is no better. I work at home doing childcare so I take care of the kids all day. I cook clean I do everything in the house besides his laundry. He does everything outside but that's once a week. When he gets home he eats dinner then watches TV or surf his phone. We have 3 kids and have been together for 10 years married for 5 years. I ask him to help and we just get in a fight. He says he is not raised that way. He was raised where his dad works and that all his mom does everything. Well I am so tired of it and want a divorce. I am a single mom paying half the bills and doing all the house work. Its so stressfull. The only thing he does is discipline the kids.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 10 on Nov. 14, 2012 at 2:23 PM
Honestly it seems like his family comes second. I would take a break. My situation is no better. I work at home doing childcare so I take care of the kids all day. I cook clean I do everything in the house besides his laundry. He does everything outside but that's once a week. When he gets home he eats dinner then watches TV or surf his phone. We have 3 kids and have been together for 10 years married for 5 years. I ask him to help and we just get in a fight. He says he is not raised that way. He was raised where his dad works and that all his mom does everything. Well I am so tired of it and want a divorce. I am a single mom paying half the bills and doing all the house work. Its so stressfull. The only thing he does is discipline the kids.
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