i need advice...how long could you stay in this marriage?

[Anonymous]

So I read another post asking how involved is your husband.
A lot of the women said 50/50
well I'll say like 25% of the time he helps but I really have to force him to help. If I ask him to change a diaper I have to get the diaper and wipes and take my son to him. I could just change it myself!!!! He doesn't clean or discipline the kids but man can he ignore them and tune into that tv. He works but it seems like he takes advantage of me because of it. He forces me to hand wash and line dry the clothes and that pissed me off. He would rather put the extra money into football polls than give me the money for laundry. He forces me to beg for diapers because he's careless with the bills and money. My name is so in debt because of him. Tomorrow he has to be to work early so I have to stay up til 4 am to wake him up because hes afraid he will over sleep.

**Anyway with all that he does would you leave this man? Or can you relate? How long would you work on a marriage like this before you called it quits? I don't work so I feel stuck! I will be leaving but I just wonder how long you personally could stay in this marriage and how long you would "try"? I want to feel like I have done everything I can to make it work.

More info in first reply

[sfkdny]

my DH is lazy as well - he does NOTHING In the home unless I basically beg or threaten him and then he wants a fucking medal (like for loading the dishwasher) - it is my own fault for letting him get away with it for 10 years...ugh

[Anonymous]

I'm a sahm too. Dh couldn't stick to a budget so I took his debit card.

Quoting Anonymous:

Since I stay at home I thought this is how it was supposed to be(even though it upset me). Now its just keeps getting worse.

Quoting Anonymous:

A lot would be changing...


First of all- why do you let it happen??

[beeonit]

My husband is bi polar and extremely removed from my family, I'd say at this point he is about 5% involved, I'm still in it for life.

[MajorsMom8215]

 I'd say bye bye!

[Anonymous]

Get him two alarm clocks. One next to his bed and one on the other side of the room. The one next to his bed will get him up enough to be aware when the second goes off 5-10 mins later, and he'll actually have to get up  to shut that one off.

[Kaseyrose21]

 Is this for real? How could ANYONE be with a man like that?! What a selfish asshole!

[Anonymous]

Well, my husband works 90 to 100 hours a week, so help at home is nil.  I keep the money and we each get 30 dollars every two weeks for whatever we want to spend it on.  We both have to sign on the budget for it to be approved and I do all the money work online while the kids nap and then email it to him for approval.  

I am not sure I could stay if it were not for the fact that we are on the same page.  It seems you two are just not talking at all and who really knows why.  I would insist on marriage counseling.  

[kidlover2]

Your wording is very bizarre to me. I guess I don't have any advice. You're either answering your own question or trying to invoke mass amounts of sympathy. Or... both

[Anonymous]

i would nevet have allowed that behavior. i would give him a chance to change his ways and if he didnt i would leave within a month or so. amd at any given time if he went back to his asshole ways i would emmidiately leave

[Anonymous]

i would nevet have allowed that behavior. i would give him a chance to change his ways and if he didnt i would leave within a month or so. amd at any given time if he went back to his asshole ways i would emmidiately leave