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Are dads held to the same standards as moms?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 311 Replies
28 moms liked this
It seems on here that they are not. If she expects him to help out at all, she is lazy. If she gets no free time and gets pissed that he does, she is a clingy bitch. If she does go out, she is a bad mom. If he is sick and vomitting all over the place, she is cold for not waiting on him (and the kids) hand and foot. If she is sick and still has to work and care for the kids she "is a mom and needs to do it". So on and so on. Why do we hold moms to higher standards then dads when dad helped create the child/ren as well. Now I understand women are amazing and can handle way more then men ;) but why do we just let them get away with these things. Marriage and parenting takes teamwork and both the man and woman should be team players in the match called life. Am I the only one to notice this double standard? What do you think?



Thought of another example I saw on reddit during the cafemom blackout. Dad is a frivolous spender putting the family in a hole so mom should get a job to make up the difference instead of dad controlling his spending.
or if dads half ass it when they help. If mom takes a kid to the store barefoot while its cold or forgets to bathe the child, she is a bad mom. If dad does it, well people are just being picky. Why is it ok for a dad to half ass parenting?
Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 14, 2012 at 9:14 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Mamasgirl524
by Platinum Member on Nov. 14, 2012 at 9:15 AM
3 moms liked this
Good question! And I agree.
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owl0210
by Emerald Member on Nov. 14, 2012 at 9:16 AM
30 moms liked this

 I've never seen so many women haters prior to joining cafemom.

702girly
by on Nov. 14, 2012 at 9:16 AM
15 moms liked this

There is no double standard in my house. 

I just laugh when I see it on here. It must suck to be them.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Nov. 14, 2012 at 9:17 AM
2 moms liked this
I know! Lol

Quoting owl0210:

 I've never seen so many women haters prior to joining cafemom.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Nov. 14, 2012 at 9:17 AM
its all in the child labor moment, well thats my view on this...men are all different just like women. we have some good parents and we have some bad once. we just never really know who until the child is here.
ashleyrenee24
by 2ne1 on Nov. 14, 2012 at 9:18 AM

I agree with you.

LectioDivina
by A.Priori on Nov. 14, 2012 at 9:19 AM
2 moms liked this

Well... I do believe that the bond between mother and child is incomparable, and that instinctively we are the one that are supposed to care for the child as the main caregiver

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Nov. 14, 2012 at 9:23 AM
Honestly, I agree with that but does that mean that dad can do whatever he wants?

Quoting LectioDivina:

Well... I do believe that the bond between mother and child is incomparable, and that instinctively we are the one that are supposed to care for the child as the main caregiver

LectioDivina
by A.Priori on Nov. 14, 2012 at 9:27 AM
4 moms liked this

No... If we're going by instincts it's the dad's job to keep the family safe, get the food, and nurture the children once they get old enough to follow his lead when learning how to survive in this world

Quoting Anonymous:

Honestly, I agree with that but does that mean that dad can do whatever he wants?

Quoting LectioDivina:

Well... I do believe that the bond between mother and child is incomparable, and that instinctively we are the one that are supposed to care for the child as the main caregiver


Matriarch87
by Ruby Member on Nov. 14, 2012 at 9:28 AM
9 moms liked this
I can only speak for myself but for me its because my husband doesnt do things how I like and its important to me it get done how I want. So when he does help I have to act all appreciative but my ears are on fire because I cannot believe he chose that pair of socks to dress my son in, I cant believe he fed him that for breakfast, I cant believe he didnt comb his hair, I cant believe he didnt pack a blanket...for examples. I used to try to teach him but he would get all offended and say im too picky or over reacting, maybe he is right. So id keep my mouth shut and mentally tell myself to do it next time.



He has no fashion sense and is incable of dressing my son nicely.



He never knows where anything is at and sewms unable to plan an hour in the future.



I dont mind him helping me clean at all but thats the one area he doesnt like helping with. Everything else I just hate how he does it...mommy knows best.



Even baths! He always "forgets" to clip my sons nails and doesnt shampoo him good enough.



But there are certainly a few things he can do right and I give him responsibilities regarding parenting and the house. Just not many.



Ive never left my husband with my son longer than a night because im scared my son will go to preschool looking like a fool, or eat spaghetti for breakfast, or wear shoes that are too small.
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