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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

A Teenager is NOT a CHILD...

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I have a teenager she is seventeen, she will always be my child even as an adult. However...

She is not a child. I do not allow my young children to drive cars, work, make decisions that require maturity and ability to think about your decision. She is a teenager, neither a child or an adult (yet).

My job is not to baby her like she is five years old. My job is to PREPARE her for the adult world. She is a Senior in High School not a first grader in Elementary school.

I honestly cannot figure out why any rational woman thinks that a teenager is a "child" and treats them like one.

~~~~~         =^..^=        ~~~~~
I'm not the cat lady type. I'm more like an actual cat. I want affection when I want it and on my own terms. The rest of the time I want to claw out your eyes and piss in your shoes. 

by on Nov. 15, 2012 at 12:21 AM
Replies (21-30):
FooLynRoo
by on Nov. 15, 2012 at 12:29 AM

What?

Quoting thetrollcat:

Only you....

Quoting FooLynRoo:

Because some people think they will magically awake on their 18 th birthday and make great decisions and be great adults - with absolutely no training or prior expectation to be.




acaisha
by Gold Member on Nov. 15, 2012 at 12:29 AM
1 mom liked this

Teenagers are still children, they still have needs that are very child like. Yes they need independance and the realization that actions have consiquences but they also need the safety and security that comes with knowing they can still be a child when they need to be. We all complain kids grow up to fast these days but when they act child-like we tell them to grow up... makes no sense.

aritoyh
by Silver Member on Nov. 15, 2012 at 12:29 AM

I agree.

thetrollcat
by Meow on Nov. 15, 2012 at 12:30 AM

I dont compare my 6 year old with my seventeen year old and my six year old is certainly no where close to having some o fthe same ability as a 13 year old. So um just because it is TEENAGER doesnt mean they are a CHILD. My six year old is a child, my seventeen year old is a teenager. Different stages in life.

Quoting ElitestJen:


Quoting thetrollcat:

whatever. Im sorry but my daughter is not a CHILD, she is adolescent she is a teenager.

Quoting ElitestJen:

A child is someone under 18.  An adult is someone 18+. 

Treating someone like a "child" can be age appropriate.  Obviously, a 17yo has different needs and expectations than someone who is 6yo.  The 17yo is still a child.

Biologically, there's an argument that one is a child until their brain is fully developed at around age 25. 


Adolescence is just another phase of childhood (and technically ends with puberty). 

And if teenager is such a catch-all term....do you believe that a 13yo is equal to a 19yo?  Since they're both "teenagers"?


~~~~~         =^..^=        ~~~~~
I'm not the cat lady type. I'm more like an actual cat. I want affection when I want it and on my own terms. The rest of the time I want to claw out your eyes and piss in your shoes. 

quickbooksworm
by Ruby Member on Nov. 15, 2012 at 12:30 AM
2 moms liked this
I agree with you 100%. A teen is a minor but not a child. I think of 16-17 as the time to step back and provide guidance. But I'm not going to check backpacks every night and all the other things I do for a kid in elementary school. I think it provides a bit of a disservice for teens to not learn how to make their own decisions.
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FooLynRoo
by on Nov. 15, 2012 at 12:30 AM

It doesn't matter what you call them

a 17 year old is not the same as a 5 year old or 12 year old and shouldn't be treated as such.

No matter what WORD you use to describe their age.


Quoting AllofFive19:

A juvenile is just a fancy word for "child".

Quoting thetrollcat:

in my state they are called juvenile or adolescents. Obviously some states are hooked on broken phonics.

Quoting AllofFive19:

Until a person is 19 (in my state) they are a child. An older child, but nonetheless a child. You can treat a child as an adult and still ask that he or she follow the rules of the house because they are not yet an adult. 




louzannalady
by Gold Member on Nov. 15, 2012 at 12:30 AM
Oh. Well, here it is.

http://www.cafemom.com/group/115189/forums/read/17607662/its_none_of_my_business_teens_first_gyn_appt?use_mobile=0


Quoting thetrollcat:

I havent seen that post but no I was inspired by the SD being pregnant AGAIN lol

Quoting louzannalady:

Is this about the "I want to know every detail of my teenager's gyno visit and violate her rights." post?


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thetrollcat
by Meow on Nov. 15, 2012 at 12:30 AM
1 mom liked this

In a lot of states if they are sixteen they can legally live on their own. So much for states truely believing they are CHILDREN.

Quoting AlekD:

Legally they are. And parents are legally responsible for the minors living under their roof so yeah they are gonna have to have rules and restrictions on their teens choices.


~~~~~         =^..^=        ~~~~~
I'm not the cat lady type. I'm more like an actual cat. I want affection when I want it and on my own terms. The rest of the time I want to claw out your eyes and piss in your shoes. 

Reepicheep.CSL
by on Nov. 15, 2012 at 12:31 AM

My eldest son is 10 years old. He isn't a baby. I wish he were still a baby, but he has been proving himself to be mature more and more often. 
I certainly don't treat him like a baby, or even a child, I treat him like a boy who is at the cusp of becoming a teen. 

yourmamahaha
by on Nov. 15, 2012 at 12:31 AM
Because some moms are jealous inside.

My mom was like that.

She ended up with alot of kids betraying her and going real crazy in thier lives. Lucky few picked themselves up when they had enough or grew just up. But still damaged for life
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