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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Are you happy at the bottom?

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

I keep seeing all of these posts about how its unfair that powerful, educated people who innovate make more money than unskilled laborers. 

Isn't this America, the land of opportunity? Don't they let anyone over 18 with a hs diploma or ged into community college? The bottom rungs of the ladder that you need to climb are accessible to all. There may be obstacles along the way, but most everyone COULD climb if they wanted to. 

You lacking the ambition to get to the top doesn't mean we should punish those who do. Those who climb generally deserve the rewards that come with the climb. 

So if you have your diploma or GED and are sad with your current wages, why are you not climbing? Do you not want a better life? Are you happy where you are? 

Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 18, 2012 at 9:22 AM
Replies (31-40):
epoh
by Ruby Member on Nov. 18, 2012 at 10:17 AM
You can do it! The most difficult part is finding a way to do both but once that is achieved its just a matter of maintaining what you have.

Quoting Anonymous:

i want to start school, but theres literally no time. i work full time, and im a single mom who gets no child support. yes, i can take my core classes online, but what do i do when i have done those, and actually have to attend? im not upset by those who are doing well. im bummed im not, but you know....it will happen eventually.  IF the ecoomy gets better. im not gonna take out loans for a degree im not gonna use. thats what MANY people are experiencing now. college degrees and working fast food

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SamiJ18
by Platinum Member on Nov. 18, 2012 at 10:17 AM

We're still in the process of climbing but I would say we are passing the halfway mark to our goals.  Sometimes I feel so discouraged and want to give up but then I slap myself and think of the angry mob that would result if I gave up lol.

I'll have my bachelor's degree in May and I should be heading off to graduate school in August.  My husband has been working at the same job since 2008 and he is now making a decent amount of money (unfortunately, we no longer get FS or WIC and our kids are in daycare so money is still tight for now).  We are homeowners and we recently replaced one of our clunker cars.

As far as the future goes, I hope to get a PhD in microbiology and immunology and a postdoc in cell biology and anatomy.  My DH would like to get his MBA.  We hope to upgrade our home into something more permanent within 10 years, and we need to replace our other car within the next 2 years.  We want to significantly increase the amount of money in our savings, we want to build retirement funds.  We would like 2 more biological children and possibly some adopted children. 

We started out as 2 kids in high school working at a pizza buffet for $5 and some change minimum  wages expecting a child in our senior year.  We lived with my FIL back then and we drove a hand me down 1984 Ford Bronco II.  I remember my husband giving me a poem and a picture from one of our photo albums for my birthday one year.  My DH and I would skip meals in order to feed our DD.  We also came from poor and uneducated families.  It was hard but, I think the experience brought my DH and I closer and made us strong, resourceful and determined.

I think the opportunities to succeed are available to everyone (this is not saying they are obtainable), they just may not be what the person desires.  Success can be difficult to obtain, the red tape you have to cut through can be discouraging.  The risks you take in trying to succeed (with no guarantee you will) can be terrifying.  Sometimes the risks outweigh the benefits in the eyes of people barely hanging on.  I also wouldn't necessarily chalk it up to a lack of ambition or laziness.  It could just be a lack of knowledge or a lack of resources.  Breaking the cycle has been the hardest thing I have ever done and I'm not even close to reaping the results of that and seeing if my plan worked.

And for those saying not everyone can go to college, that is true.  However, there are plenty of opportunities to obtain certificates, attend trade school and even attend job training and workforce development.  The point is, there are so many things out there.

America is the land of opportunity, if you know where look and you are adept enough to jump through hoops.


ETA:  And if you cannot break the cycle yourself, at least help your children break it.  Make sure they know what is out there and they can make the climb.

lizmartinez
by Bronze Member on Nov. 18, 2012 at 10:18 AM
We're "at the bottom" now due to age. We're doing what we're meant to do and working our way up. DH is finishing at the university and starting med school in the next year. My family helps financially occasionally because we actually have earning potential in the future. Can't see why anyone is happy working minimum wage their whole lives...go to some technical school at least.
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LectioDivina
by on Nov. 18, 2012 at 10:19 AM

27 thousand dollars a year is not exactly accessible to everyone once the time comes for a Bachelors

epoh
by Ruby Member on Nov. 18, 2012 at 10:20 AM
1 mom liked this
While that is true, the current economy and general situation of this generation is quite different than what your parents experienced.

Quoting momma2mms:

Not true! My parents were both poor as you can be growing up. My parents are extremely successful and no one helped them one bit. Hard work and determination go a long way.


Quoting SlightlyPerfect:


It's not just money, though.


People who are successful often had opportunities those raised in poverty didn't have access to. Now, my dad was born into poverty, pulled himself out of it, and is now quite wealthy. Other (Most?) people do not. Conversely, other people who are in that same income bracket as my father are trust-fund babies or they made some nice investing decisions back in the day.


The issue I take with your post is that you seem to define success by how much money one makes, not how one makes money. I'll agree with you that I've also had enough of people's bitching and whining, but I can understand their frustration when they discuss how skewed and unjust the system is. The economy is broken., Yeah, you can still succeed in a broken economy, but it's going to be that much more frustrating of a process.


But claiming people are "lazy" or that they "feel entitled" is just really oversimplifying the issue. We do have a labor force here. We do have people that want to work.



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Anonymous
by Anonymous 9 on Nov. 18, 2012 at 10:21 AM

You don't understand the weight of the obstacles I currently face...I'm not giving up by any means, but at the same time I'm stuck for a while where I am.

I'd get a refund on what ever education you received.  It obviously didn't help you learn to think critically, or understand that people have different circumstances.   

mami2my3rugratz
by on Nov. 18, 2012 at 10:21 AM
Congrats MommyAddie. I know all about that. Divorce can be hard on you. I'm now a CNA, I have a business starting, I'm in school for my masters and I have three children. Kudos sweetie and to all the moms that are go-getters.
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liltigersmom
by on Nov. 18, 2012 at 10:23 AM
Success is not a one size fits all.
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momma2mms
by Kristin on Nov. 18, 2012 at 10:23 AM

True, but in the early 60's all of these government assistance programs (for education) were not available. Some aspects were easier, some harder.

Quoting epoh:

While that is true, the current economy and general situation of this generation is quite different than what your parents experienced.

Quoting momma2mms:

Not true! My parents were both poor as you can be growing up. My parents are extremely successful and no one helped them one bit. Hard work and determination go a long way.


Quoting SlightlyPerfect:


It's not just money, though.


People who are successful often had opportunities those raised in poverty didn't have access to. Now, my dad was born into poverty, pulled himself out of it, and is now quite wealthy. Other (Most?) people do not. Conversely, other people who are in that same income bracket as my father are trust-fund babies or they made some nice investing decisions back in the day.


The issue I take with your post is that you seem to define success by how much money one makes, not how one makes money. I'll agree with you that I've also had enough of people's bitching and whining, but I can understand their frustration when they discuss how skewed and unjust the system is. The economy is broken., Yeah, you can still succeed in a broken economy, but it's going to be that much more frustrating of a process.


But claiming people are "lazy" or that they "feel entitled" is just really oversimplifying the issue. We do have a labor force here. We do have people that want to work.


 


epoh
by Ruby Member on Nov. 18, 2012 at 10:23 AM
Can you please PM me? Your profile is set to private and I am unable to PM you. I assure you I have nothing but fabulous things to say.

Quoting SamiJ18:

We're still in the process of climbing but I would say we are passing the halfway mark to our goals.  Sometimes I feel so discouraged and want to give up but then I slap myself and think of the angry mob that would result if I gave up lol.

I'll have my bachelor's degree in May and I should be heading off to graduate school in August.  My husband has been working at the same job since 2008 and he is now making a decent amount of money (unfortunately, we no longer get FS or WIC and our kids are in daycare so money is still tight for now).  We are homeowners and we recently replaced one of our clunker cars.

As far as the future goes, I hope to get a PhD in microbiology and immunology and a postdoc in cell biology and anatomy.  My DH would like to get his MBA.  We hope to upgrade our home into something more permanent within 10 years, and we need to replace our other car within the next 2 years.  We want to significantly increase the amount of money in our savings, we want to build retirement funds.  We would like 2 more biological children and possibly some adopted children. 

We started out as 2 kids in high school working at a pizza buffet for $5 and some change minimum  wages expecting a child in our senior year.  We lived with my FIL back then and we drove a hand me down 1984 Ford Bronco II.  I remember my husband giving me a poem and a picture from one of our photo albums for my birthday one year.  My DH and I would skip meals in order to feed our DD.  We also came from poor and uneducated families.  It was hard but, I think the experience brought my DH and I closer and made us strong, resourceful and determined.

I think the opportunities to succeed are available to everyone (this is not saying they are obtainable), they just may not be what the person desires.  Success can be difficult to obtain, the red tape you have to cut through can be discouraging.  The risks you take in trying to succeed (with no guarantee you will) can be terrifying.  Sometimes the risks outweigh the benefits in the eyes of people barely hanging on.  I also wouldn't necessarily chalk it up to a lack of ambition or laziness.  It could just be a lack of knowledge or a lack of resources.  Breaking the cycle has been the hardest thing I have ever done and I'm not even close to reaping the results of that and seeing if my plan worked.

And for those saying not everyone can go to college, that is true.  However, there are plenty of opportunities to obtain certificates, attend trade school and even attend job training and workforce development.  The point is, there are so many things out there.

America is the land of opportunity, if you know where look and you are adept enough to jump through hoops.


ETA:  And if you cannot break the cycle yourself, at least help your children break it.  Make sure they know what is out there and they can make the climb.

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