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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

SO and I broke up but will live together to co-parent

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 115 Replies
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Yep so my SO of 2 and 1/2 years and I broke up. We have a 4 month old son and currently live in a 1br apartment. Our plan is to move to a 2br apartment and have seperate rooms (and beds obviously). Instead of one us moving out of the apartment we're in we will just live together but not be dating. No sex. No "love you baby", we can date other people when we feel we're ready or if after somewhat of a break (at least having our own personal space and nights out with our own friends for once) if we both want to re-evaluate then we'll do that and if we get back together we'll makes someone's bedroom the nursery.



Ex SO works a lot, all week until pretty late at night and I just dont feel like he would have enough time for his son if I lived 30 minutes to an hour away and I dont want to do that to him.



DS will have his crib in my room.because we breastfeed so ex SO has never been up at night anyway, plus ex SO will sleep much better because DS is kind of a loud nurser, lol.



What do you think of this??? A friend actually suggested it and when I told my mom she thought it was a great idea. Do you see any problems coming from this???

*Edit* We have both also agreed that if we do get SO's that they wont be coming around our son until me or ex so have been dating them for 6 months + and the other has to be comfortable with that SO (to help avoid stupid 18 year olds trying to play mommy or anything!)
Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 18, 2012 at 11:49 PM
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Replies (1-10):
firespurity
by Ruby Member on Nov. 18, 2012 at 11:52 PM
Jealousy when dating begins. But that can be taken care of. Just resist being petty.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous on Nov. 18, 2012 at 11:54 PM
4 moms liked this
Won't work. Good luck though, I respect the attempt on behalf of your daughter. I just know from experience that it won't work. It's hard to move on when your past is constantly in your face
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Nov. 18, 2012 at 11:55 PM
I dont think either of us would date for at least the next 6 months but I would hope we could both keep from getting jealous! If we're jealous of each others SO's then we should be together! lol


Quoting firespurity:

Jealousy when dating begins. But that can be taken care of. Just resist being petty.

AllofFive19
by Ruby Member on Nov. 18, 2012 at 11:55 PM
1 mom liked this

It works for some couples. My husband works with a guy who's ex has the upstairs and he has the downstairs.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Nov. 18, 2012 at 11:56 PM
4 moms liked this
I think this is a really, really bad idea. Either you're together or you're not. Most likely, you're going to end up sleeping together if you're under the same roof, but then he'll still have the "okay" to deal with other women. And how's that going to work when you want to date but you have to explain why you live like a family with your ex and baby?

I think you should either commit to fixing the relationship (with couples counselling) or end it and separate. It isn't healthy in the long run to do this half-separated thing.
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Nov. 18, 2012 at 11:56 PM
2 moms liked this

It actually sounds like you're making a smart decision. Is that allowed on here? I say it's great that you both are not only thinking of yourselves but also considering what would be good for your child.

Crashly
by Ashley on Nov. 18, 2012 at 11:56 PM
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Bad idea.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous on Nov. 18, 2012 at 11:56 PM
1 mom liked this

It won't work but good luck anyway.

jkleinman
by Ruby Member on Nov. 18, 2012 at 11:57 PM
Good luck!
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Fallaya
by on Nov. 18, 2012 at 11:57 PM



Quoting Anonymous:

It won't work but good luck anyway.


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