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I invited my MIL to my homebirth...

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

And said she was "going to come anyways."

Why do people not think it is a big deal to invite someone to their birth whether it be out of hospital, in hospital or a birth center? Why do people just "expect" to be invited. It is an EXTREMELY intimate and EXTREMELY life changing experience to give birth rather it be c-section or vaginal.No matter how many times you give birth.

This is my second birth and she may not even make it since she lives 2,000 miles away.

Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 19, 2012 at 3:57 PM
Replies (91-100):
by Anonymous 15 on Nov. 19, 2012 at 8:04 PM

I don't understand parents wanting to be in the room. I don't want to be in the room during ANYBODY'S birth experience! I would do it if either of my daughters asked me to but I would NEVER insist or expect to be in the room. When I told my mom I was pregnant with my second, she said, "Do I at least get to be in the room this time?" 
Uhhh...hell fuckin' NO. She BEGGED me! I just don't get it!!! 

by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 8:16 PM

My MIL just showed up at the delivery of my first child and didn't leave.  I didn't ask her to leave because it didn't really bother me but I was taken aback by her assumption she could stay.  Maybe she just thought it was okay since I didn't kick her out.  Anyway, she has been there to witness all three.

by Anonymous 16 on Nov. 19, 2012 at 8:41 PM

My stepfather was with us durning the birth of my first two. I should mention that he had never had children of his own and had never seen a birth before and that he had been a vital part of my life, even walking me down the isle at my wedding. He stayed back and let my mom and husband have their respected places and I forgot he was threre. Later he expressed his thankfullness with tears. I've never regretted allowing him there. So in my opinion, whoever you want with you, go for it~even if it isn't "proper".

by Ruby Member on Nov. 19, 2012 at 9:02 PM

my mom and MIL told me specifically they did not want to be in the room lol.  It's a special moment, should just be husband and wife unless you both agree to add others to the mix.  I personally felt enough people were getting to see my goodies that day and didn't want to add to the number.

by Ruby Member on Nov. 19, 2012 at 9:03 PM

 Wow...that's pretty rude.  My MIL assumed she was coming when I went into labor but had NO intentions of coming in the room with me unless I asked...which I didn't.  She was perfectly happy to hang out with my dad and my sister while my husband, mother, and midwife tended to me.

by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 9:04 PM

my mil won't be invited to anything i host. 

my birthes or any of my parties. 

by Platinum Member on Nov. 19, 2012 at 9:27 PM

I think it's nice to invite her, but I would be rather out of sorts that she planned on showing up.  Anyone there for the birth of my kids had to be invited.  Period.  It's a very revealing moment, and not a public show.  

My MIL said that about my SD - that she was going to be in there. I notice she didn't try that with me.  Probably because we were in a bit of a tiff while I was pregnant.  Had we not been, I would have invited her.  For the second kid, I did.  She declined due to distance. 

But NO ONE was an auto show except my DH.

Take a deep breath.  Sometimes the GPs/IL get all stupid around the birth of their GK.  

by squeekers on Nov. 19, 2012 at 9:28 PM

 when i was in hospital, there was a lady one door down from me who had a strict NO on her L&D door. the hubby & her only wanted the ob/gyn and nurses in the room, no matter how many of their family members stomped their feet and complained in the waiting room. There was about 22 family members, so I randomly overheared from the nurses.

by Anonymous 17 on Nov. 19, 2012 at 9:57 PM

It is rude to say they were going to come anyways.  With one of our sons my FIL was in the room as well as my mom, and our other son. Our son cut his brothers cord.  With other births it was my sister and my mother.  Of course hubby was there for all.

by Anonymous 18 on Nov. 19, 2012 at 10:00 PM

it will just be me and dh... I'll have security remove any one else who thinks they can just barge in. They can all hang out in the waiting room until baby is out, everyone is clean, etc.

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