Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

What would you do if your 4 year old told you this about preschool?????????

Posted by   + Show Post

I made a post last week but I would like some more opinions.

My four year old son came home from preschool and told me that him and two other boys go in the back corner where no one else can see them and play Dr. Theres a big rock in the corner they call "the dr bed" He told me one boy got completely naked, the other boy took his shoes, socks, pants, underwear off. That's when the teacher found them! He told me he was patient number 3 so he didn't get to play yet. He said the teacher helped the other boys get dressed! He only knows one of the boys names the other one he never played with before.

Now, this was last Thursday I went to the school first thing Friday morning asking the director why I was not told about this incident since a teacher found them. She had no idea about it, the teacher never told her. I told her I thought it was inappropriate and I believe an incident report should have been written and there is no reason i should be hearing this from my 4 year old!! I know the one mother of the other boy and I told her.The teacher that found them took Friday off so she was not there. She said she would call me first thing Monday morning, by 11:00 I did not receive a call. I called at 11:45 and she said the teacher came in today not feeling well so she sent her home and she would call me tomorrow. I'm pissed she didn't even call to tell me that she didn't get a chance to talk to her or just give me a call to let me know she would ask tomorrow...I feel that this is being handled completely wrong!!! I told her my son would not be attending school until I get some explanation!

This is what I want. I want her story of what happened, an explatation of why she did not report this, I want all parents informed of her story what she saw and did, and all children talked to!!!

I'm so upset with all of this? Am I handling this wrong, should i demand more? Please give your advice and opinions on what you would do in this situation....

No bashing please Thank you

 

ETA: I'm also very concerned that he doesn't know the one boys name because my son always stays and plays with his best buddies so it's very strange that he was off with a boy he doesn't know

by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 5:45 PM
Replies (21-30):
Liyoness
by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 6:41 PM

What do you want 'done' about it? Do you want your child to have a 1:1 worker so he never has a single second to himself? I highly doubt most professional offices would drop everything to put a worker in for something like this.

The teacher stopped it, she got them dressed, and she likely explained that clothes stay on at preschool. There's nothing more to be done. Maybe they need to put the doctor toys away for a couple months, but that's about it.

Quoting jb0520:

I agree, I just want something done about it

Quoting MrsRinehart2010:

 I think that your doing is fine but I would make sure they ask that the boys not be named so that the boy thier self arent being labledl.. fact is it could be something completly innocent or it could be something else going on.



BamaMomto4
by Silver Member on Nov. 19, 2012 at 6:44 PM

I caught one of my boys comparing himself to one of his friends when the boys were around 6 yrs old.I heard one of them say "mine's bigger." I interupted them and sent my son home while I informed the other boy's mom so she could have a talk about keeping privates private.Then I went home and had the same talk with my son.

Quoting Kaybean:

Actually, it IS quite normal. I remember playing Dr once when I was little. I also remember my brother getting naked with his friend outside when they were 5 and thought it was silly. No abuse or molestation at all ever occurred. I also nanny for a psychologist who runs a treatment center specifically FOR children who have been molested, abused or have a troubled life/behavioral issues. She has stacks of books that talk about this type of thing and it is so normal. That doesn't mean it should be allowed, but it is normal and happens with many kids.


Quoting Anonymous:

I would be pissed! I don't think that kind of play is either typical or normal! It scares me that others think that kind of play is okay and would let it continue or not tell their kids that it's off limits to play that way!


Lisa

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Nov. 19, 2012 at 6:45 PM
1 mom liked this
That is your opinion! Sneaking off in school and getting completely naked is not okay! Show me yours and I will show you mine, normal. Three boys sneaking off, Getting naked and playing dr/touching each other is not normal! The more we make our kids think this is okay behavior the farther the kids will take it! curiousity is normal, making a game of touching each other or examining each other is not okay! Too many kids are bombarded with sex and sexual situations at an age that they don't know how to process what they have seen and what they feel.

Quoting Kaybean:

Actually, it IS quite normal. I remember playing Dr once when I was little. I also remember my brother getting naked with his friend outside when they were 5 and thought it was silly. No abuse or molestation at all ever occurred. I also nanny for a psychologist who runs a treatment center specifically FOR children who have been molested, abused or have a troubled life/behavioral issues. She has stacks of books that talk about this type of thing and it is so normal. That doesn't mean it should be allowed, but it is normal and happens with many kids.




Quoting Anonymous:

I would be pissed! I don't think that kind of play is either typical or normal! It scares me that others think that kind of play is okay and would let it continue or not tell their kids that it's off limits to play that way!

jb0520
by Platinum Member on Nov. 19, 2012 at 7:56 PM
Thats not why I wasnt told because the teacher didn't even tell the director! And my kids was playing with two naked boys, that doesn't warrant an explanation to you?


Quoting BamaMomto4:

They may not have told you because your son was not undressed when the teacher found them. And you may never find out how the teacher handled the other kids because of privacy issues.This would be a very good time to have a talk with your son about keeping private parts private. 

Quoting jb0520:


Thats the thing tho, they weren't ever going to tell me.





Quoting peanutsmommy1:

I would wait to hear from the teacher before jumping to any conclusions. Im not saying your child,is lying, but you dont have the whole story




Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Nov. 19, 2012 at 8:01 PM

You do realize that sometimes 4 year olds lie,  get the whole story before you light the torches!

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Nov. 19, 2012 at 8:04 PM
My son and two boys at daycare did this around the same age. One of the parents blamed it all on my kid. But the daycare center director said her kid would be more affected because they made such a huge issue of it. My feelings were never so hurt in my entire lifetime. I Still see those parents around school and want to flip them off still, its been 10 years
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Nov. 19, 2012 at 8:05 PM
Mabye you should call the school board
jb0520
by Platinum Member on Nov. 19, 2012 at 8:08 PM
I do realize that that's why I asked her to explain!! His story was very detailed and hes never been known to be a story teller...


Quoting Anonymous:

You do realize that sometimes 4 year olds lie,  get the whole story before you light the torches!


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
jb0520
by Platinum Member on Nov. 19, 2012 at 8:09 PM
My son spent even know I'm acting on it! I'm not trying to hurt anyone, in trying to get answers!


Quoting Anonymous:

My son and two boys at daycare did this around the same age. One of the parents blamed it all on my kid. But the daycare center director said her kid would be more affected because they made such a huge issue of it. My feelings were never so hurt in my entire lifetime. I Still see those parents around school and want to flip them off still, its been 10 years

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
SlightlyPerfect
Report
Just imagine how much people could accomplish after they accept that there is no god. No god to blame. No god to thank. No god to praise. No god to grant or deny requests. No predetermined plan. Just imagine the possibilities that would come with that one realization that people have to take ownership of themselves, their choices, and their moral obligations.
Today at 10:57 AM
by Babushka Blockparty on Nov. 19, 2012 at 8:10 PM

You just gotta go in there and confront the teacher face to face.

slightlyperfect

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)