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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

What would you do if your 4 year old told you this about preschool?????????

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I made a post last week but I would like some more opinions.

My four year old son came home from preschool and told me that him and two other boys go in the back corner where no one else can see them and play Dr. Theres a big rock in the corner they call "the dr bed" He told me one boy got completely naked, the other boy took his shoes, socks, pants, underwear off. That's when the teacher found them! He told me he was patient number 3 so he didn't get to play yet. He said the teacher helped the other boys get dressed! He only knows one of the boys names the other one he never played with before.

Now, this was last Thursday I went to the school first thing Friday morning asking the director why I was not told about this incident since a teacher found them. She had no idea about it, the teacher never told her. I told her I thought it was inappropriate and I believe an incident report should have been written and there is no reason i should be hearing this from my 4 year old!! I know the one mother of the other boy and I told her.The teacher that found them took Friday off so she was not there. She said she would call me first thing Monday morning, by 11:00 I did not receive a call. I called at 11:45 and she said the teacher came in today not feeling well so she sent her home and she would call me tomorrow. I'm pissed she didn't even call to tell me that she didn't get a chance to talk to her or just give me a call to let me know she would ask tomorrow...I feel that this is being handled completely wrong!!! I told her my son would not be attending school until I get some explanation!

This is what I want. I want her story of what happened, an explatation of why she did not report this, I want all parents informed of her story what she saw and did, and all children talked to!!!

I'm so upset with all of this? Am I handling this wrong, should i demand more? Please give your advice and opinions on what you would do in this situation....

No bashing please Thank you

 

ETA: I'm also very concerned that he doesn't know the one boys name because my son always stays and plays with his best buddies so it's very strange that he was off with a boy he doesn't know

by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 5:45 PM
Replies (31-40):
allycally
by Platinum Member on Nov. 19, 2012 at 8:12 PM
Well its normal behavior the teacher corrected the problem andprobably didn't discuss it with you because your child was not directly involved....
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UgtaBkdnMe
by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 8:14 PM

There's so much wrong in that story I would be finding a new school.

LucyHarper
by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 8:18 PM

I would be mildly concerned that they were able to go off where no one could see them for that long, and would want something done about that. As for the playing doctor thing, little kids do that sometimes, I would want to make sure that the children are spoken to about how private parts are private and that's not allowed and would want them to talk to the children and make sure nothing else is going on, but otherwise, it's childs play, I would want the other parents notified but I wouldn't be too freaked out.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 6 on Nov. 19, 2012 at 8:19 PM
There is a chance it may not be accurate, but either way this is a serious matter that needs to be handled ASAP. She should have notified you immediately. This is a red flag that the preschool is no good. I would find out who you can call to have a state worker come and do an investigation because this has not been handled properly by the school in any way!! Keep us updated.
Beauty91805
by Platinum Member on Nov. 19, 2012 at 8:24 PM
Whats concerning is that no one was watching these kids! Thats just a shame. I don't blame you for being upset. I think I would go to the school everyday until I got to speak with his teacher.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 7 on Nov. 19, 2012 at 8:26 PM
I would probably be even more mad than you!
momo3fgr8tteens
by Ruby Member on Nov. 19, 2012 at 8:32 PM

I would mostly be concerned that the kids were somewhere where the teacher could not keep an eye on them. Its normal at that age to play doctor and even take clothes off since that is what kids do at the doctors. However, it does not seem like they were properly supervised. 

Kaybean
by Ruby Member on Nov. 19, 2012 at 8:57 PM
I never said it was OKAY. I said it was common and normal. It isn't an opinion. The last I nanny for has bar PhD and teaches seminars at the U of M. I'm pretty sure she knows what she's talking shot and so do the books she has. Kids don't always look at it sexually. I agree that too many kids are bombarded with sexualized stuff and yeah, they don't know how to process it. A perfect example of how they are curious to investigate those things. They need to be talked to and it isn't something that should be allowed, but it IS normal. You are wrong.


Quoting Anonymous:

That is your opinion! Sneaking off in school and getting completely naked is not okay! Show me yours and I will show you mine, normal. Three boys sneaking off, Getting naked and playing dr/touching each other is not normal! The more we make our kids think this is okay behavior the farther the kids will take it! curiousity is normal, making a game of touching each other or examining each other is not okay! Too many kids are bombarded with sex and sexual situations at an age that they don't know how to process what they have seen and what they feel.



Quoting Kaybean:

Actually, it IS quite normal. I remember playing Dr once when I was little. I also remember my brother getting naked with his friend outside when they were 5 and thought it was silly. No abuse or molestation at all ever occurred. I also nanny for a psychologist who runs a treatment center specifically FOR children who have been molested, abused or have a troubled life/behavioral issues. She has stacks of books that talk about this type of thing and it is so normal. That doesn't mean it should be allowed, but it is normal and happens with many kids.






Quoting Anonymous:

I would be pissed! I don't think that kind of play is either typical or normal! It scares me that others think that kind of play is okay and would let it continue or not tell their kids that it's off limits to play that way!


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TurtleSquish
by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 9:02 PM
As a teacher, I would hyave told you, the other parents and the director. First of all, I'm concerned that one boy may be leading them to do more than just doctor. Second, I'm a mandatory reporter. I would be asking why the teacher could lose track of the 3 boys long enough for them to get naked. Yes, she probably had a lot of kids but there is ratio for a reason. I believe its 10 children to one adult in my state (for that age) 3 missing kids is a lot
jb0520
by Platinum Member on Nov. 20, 2012 at 11:09 AM
I completely agree with you! It takes some time to get completely naked too! Thank you for your input!


Quoting TurtleSquish:

As a teacher, I would hyave told you, the other parents and the director. First of all, I'm concerned that one boy may be leading them to do more than just doctor. Second, I'm a mandatory reporter. I would be asking why the teacher could lose track of the 3 boys long enough for them to get naked. Yes, she probably had a lot of kids but there is ratio for a reason. I believe its 10 children to one adult in my state (for that age) 3 missing kids is a lot

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