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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Stop blaming your parents! You're an adult now!

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 37 Replies

 

Poll

Question: If they were you kids, would you feel guilty

Options:

yes

no

undecided.


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Total Votes: 40

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This is a popular saying round these parts. I'm just wondering does it go both ways? Would you feel guilty or responsible for bad choices your children make once they become adults? For arguments sake, let's say that you are 67 years old. You have 5 adult children.

The oldest is mentally ill and can not live on his own.

The second oldest lives on her own, but has never been happy in life. Most likely she has an undiagnosed personality disorder.

Next one in line has never been able to be financially responsible. She's had 7 abortions that you know of, and your grand daughter has had two already at the age of 19. Her home is currently in the process of foreclosure.

The next one is a doormat.

Then the baby of the family has a learning disability. She never made it through high school and is now unemployed.

All children have spent thousands in therapy.

So what do you think? As a mom would you feel guilty or responsible for any of those things or is it their jobs as adults to compensate for your shortcomings as a parent?

Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 20, 2012 at 7:38 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Nov. 20, 2012 at 7:41 PM

bump

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Nov. 20, 2012 at 7:42 PM
*their
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Nov. 20, 2012 at 7:43 PM

I give my kids the knowledge and upbringing they need in order to succeed in life. Its up to them to use it as a tool to make something of themselves. My mother was and still is slack. She's just now getting a place after being homeless for 3 years and my father abandoned us when I was 5. Out of the 5 kids they had, one grew up to be a chemist, then another a teacher, me a RN, and the two younger are barely making it. I made something of myself because I didnt want to be like my mother. I made that choice. 

wilesmomma
by Gold Member on Nov. 20, 2012 at 7:44 PM
Of course I would, I'm their mother. I'll always try to blame myself in some way of their short comings even if it's not my fault.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Nov. 20, 2012 at 7:44 PM


Quoting Anonymous:

*their

ooh, thanks. I missed that.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Nov. 20, 2012 at 7:46 PM


Quoting Anonymous:

I give my kids the knowledge and upbringing they need in order to succeed in life. Its up to them to use it as a tool to make something of themselves. My mother was and still is slack. She's just now getting a place after being homeless for 3 years and my father abandoned us when I was 5. Out of the 5 kids they had, one grew up to be a chemist, then another a teacher, me a RN, and the two younger are barely making it. I made something of myself because I didnt want to be like my mother. I made that choice. 

But that is all relative. Every one of this woman's kids has done far better than their mother.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Nov. 20, 2012 at 7:46 PM
1 mom liked this
It sounds like the family has a history of mental illness which is a mixture of environment and genetics. I'd feel guilty.
mrsbrand
by Platinum Member on Nov. 20, 2012 at 7:46 PM
2 moms liked this
I would feel guilty but its ridiculous to blame your parents for who you are as an adult. I am who I am because of me. At the end of the day Iam responsible for my own actions and decisions.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Nov. 20, 2012 at 7:47 PM

That is a very specific situation with all of the children having very compromising problems....

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Nov. 20, 2012 at 7:47 PM

the two youngest arent. They are barely making it. 

Quoting Anonymous:


Quoting Anonymous:

I give my kids the knowledge and upbringing they need in order to succeed in life. Its up to them to use it as a tool to make something of themselves. My mother was and still is slack. She's just now getting a place after being homeless for 3 years and my father abandoned us when I was 5. Out of the 5 kids they had, one grew up to be a chemist, then another a teacher, me a RN, and the two younger are barely making it. I made something of myself because I didnt want to be like my mother. I made that choice. 

But that is all relative. Every one of this woman's kids has done far better than their mother.


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