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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

why i prefer my committed relationship to marriage

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 230 Replies
14 moms liked this
My SO and I are perfectly comfortable in our committed long-term relationship.

We've discussed marriage our entire 5 years together, but always come to the mutual conclusion that it isn't necessary.

Why not, you may ask? My question is: why so? For the financial reasons? Because society tells you that's what you're supposed to do? To make a man prove he loves you (even though many a marriage have failed regardless of that show of commitment)?

I feel like committed relationships are stronger than a lot of marriages are these days. In a committed relationship, neither party is legally bound to each other...they are bound by love and desire to be together. Either party could easily walk away at any time, without the legal hassle and dismantling of a "contract"...but they choose not to. Nobody in a committed relationship is stuck with a no longer desired spouse because they "can't afford a divorce". Nobody in a committed relationship is stuck in a loveless marriage forced to turn a blind eye to their spouse's indiscretions just because they "don't believe in divorce".

Look at the history of the conditions of marriage...who is or is not allowed to marry based on social class, race, sexual orientation, etc. I mean come on, if marriage is such a holy and god-given gift, why have humans put their own conditions on it?

Marriage always has been and always will be simply about money. A contract, if you will. Now instead of paying off your daddy for your hand with a few acres and a mule, your future husband is supposed to get a ring to show the world that he possesses you. And women have the audacity to bitch about the size, shape, type, and cost of their symbol of love? Please...it's simply about money. Sure, some marriages were based on love and have kept that basis alive, but plenty have dissipated because the focus was improper from the beginning.

I will never consider a marriage to carry more weight than a committed relationship. Ever.
Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 21, 2012 at 11:18 AM
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Replies (1-10):
atyou
by on Nov. 21, 2012 at 11:19 AM
20 moms liked this
To me, marriage is a completion of our family.


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alwayskk
by on Nov. 21, 2012 at 11:22 AM
2 moms liked this

That's cool for you.

I don't agree that marriage is always about money. Yes, there is a history there. That doesn't mean we can't change the future of it.

I also see nothing wrong with simply not believe in marriage.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Nov. 21, 2012 at 11:23 AM
12 moms liked this

Good for you gor being "against the grain".

 *eye roll* 

deccaf
by on Nov. 21, 2012 at 11:25 AM
4 moms liked this

Actually, if you are in a committed relationship and have any property or children together, when you split, you do have to go through a process much like a divorce to split the possessions, determine custody of a child, etc.

I have no problem with unmarried committed relationships, but from people I know who have split after many years, it can be just as difficult as a divorce.

AmaliaD
by Platinum Member on Nov. 21, 2012 at 11:25 AM
7 moms liked this

i can see what you are saying about your personal relationship but you cant say all marriage is about money.   i married my dh because he begged me to .  on his knees.  begged me to be with him forever.   your SO is happy with his ability to walk at any time..... so whatever. :)

katiehopson
by on Nov. 21, 2012 at 11:26 AM
3 moms liked this

So what if, in the unfortunate possibility, he is in the hospital and someone needs to make an important decision on his care? 

minnesotamommie
by on Nov. 21, 2012 at 11:27 AM
2 moms liked this

to me, marriage has never been about money, my marriage is about utual love and desire to be together. we wanted to be joined in every sense that we could be because of how committed we are and how much we love each other. you shouldn't take your assumptions about marriage and married couples and make then general statements. most married couples I know are happy and got married because they love each other and are still in love with each other. not some twisted married because of money and stayed in a loveless unfaithfull partnership

Tinabee88
by Platinum Member on Nov. 21, 2012 at 11:28 AM
3 moms liked this
Not this type of post again!

We get it! Marriage is just a piece of paper to you. Good grief!
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evelynolivesmom
by Gold Member on Nov. 21, 2012 at 11:28 AM
1 mom liked this

 I agree somewhat, marriage, committed relationships whatever, the bond that keeps people together should have nothing to do with paperwork or jewelry and is nobody's business but the two involved. I do think, however that saying marriage has always been about money is very disrespectful.

jbirchard
by Gold Member on Nov. 21, 2012 at 11:30 AM
Im perfectly happy where we are. We are about to celebrate 13 years in a very commited relationship. We have 2 wonderfully awesome and handsome boys.
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