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My best friends mom died and I have a question

Posted by on Nov. 23, 2012 at 7:25 AM
  • 9 Replies
She died completely unexpected on Monday. She was only 48 and went to sleep and didn't wake up in the am. My friends dad found her and they are all hysterical 😥. A extremely similar thing happened with my dad almost 11 years ago - he was 47, went to sleep and never woke up. Try both had substance abuse issues - my dad abused prescription drugs, her mom alohol and prescription drugs. My dads autopsy came back with high levels of Tylenol in his system but no prescription drugs and his death was deemed "accidental suicide." My friend said her mom was clean for a while but started again a few weeks ago then stopped cold turkey for the holiday and they think her body just couldn't handle anymore. It's so trrribly sad no matter the situation. Both of our parents were good, functional family people but had their substance abuse problem. So here's my question: I was close to their family for probably about 12 years and my friend is by fat my dearest friend. The viewing is today from 3-9. Do I stay the entire time? It's such a long time but of course I will stay, I just do t know what to do. Thanks.
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by on Nov. 23, 2012 at 7:25 AM
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Replies (1-9):
klespeedy0205
by Silver Member on Nov. 23, 2012 at 7:28 AM
If it was my best friend I would stay the whole time. I'm sorry for your loss.
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pristine729
by Silver Member on Nov. 23, 2012 at 7:28 AM
You do not need to stay the whole time.

Same thing happened to my best friends 48 year old mom. (alcoholic)
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Anonymous
by Anonymous on Nov. 23, 2012 at 7:31 AM

You don't need to stay the entire time, that is a very long time, and they are probably expecting a lot of people to have hours that long. I would go, pay your respects, and stay as long as you feel comfortable.

JeremysMom
by on Nov. 23, 2012 at 7:32 AM
I wouldn't stay the entire time if she has other people there for support. Maybe stay for an hour or so and see how she is doing and base it off of that.
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malissaL
by Platinum Member on Nov. 23, 2012 at 7:33 AM

you don't need to stay the entire time, but  just in case, I would ask my friend what I could help with and make sure I was always there to lean on. :(  That's terrible :(  Hate to see a dear friend hurting so bad..

kngarber
by Katie on Nov. 23, 2012 at 7:33 AM
No, you don't need to stay the entire time. That's a very long time. It's just so everyone can make it.
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MrsRobinson06
by Silver Member on Nov. 23, 2012 at 7:34 AM
When my grandmother died a few years ago, the viewing was empty, we went in said a few words and sat down for a few moments then left. I do not believe you stay the whole time for that, just the actual funeral itself. This is so people can go when it's best for them.
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Melanie420
by on Nov. 23, 2012 at 7:39 AM
I wouldn't stay the whole time unless it was for family, I wouldn't expect my friends to stay the entire time for my family member
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alison08
by Member on Nov. 23, 2012 at 7:39 AM
I have been 😥. As horrible as it is, I think it's comforting to her and her brother to know someone else knows how horrible it is. I've been over her house and calling everyday. And she will talk to me so I'm so thankful for that. I truly love her like a sister and I hate that she has to deal with this bc I know how terrible it is.


Quoting malissaL:

you don't need to stay the entire time, but  just in case, I would ask my friend what I could help with and make sure I was always there to lean on. :(  That's terrible :(  Hate to see a dear friend hurting so bad..


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