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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

See if I EVER lend you money again!!! UPDATE.

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

We stupidly loaned money to my BIL and his wife. They claimed that they had no money for food. They have a little boy (22 months) which is the only reason I agreed to lend them money. I didn't want the poor boy to have to suffer. We talked to them about being more responsible witht their money and told them this is the only time we will lend you money and you must pay it back. I would have rather had them come and work for us for the money but they live too far away. Anyways, they promised they would be more responsible, pay us back as soon as they could, etc. That was back in February. Yes, February. We have asked several times for the repayment. We don't need the money but feel that they should pay it back because that was the agreement. They keep claiming that they can't pay us yet because they don't have enough money. I get on Facebook this morning and see this status update from the wife.

"$463 dollars later and I am finished shopping for _____ (BIL)!!! He's going to love his Christmas gifts!"


They only owed us $150. As I said the amount is not what is bothering me. They made a promise to repay us and apparently are going to break that promise. I wouldn't be near as upset if that money had went toward bills or even their son's Christmas but for BIL, really?!? He is a grown man. Grrrrr!!!!! Vent over.

Yes, I know it was dumb to lend them the money and we are never doing it again. I am assuming they will never pay us back.


Update: Thanks for all the great advice! I didn't say anything to her or BIL about the money. We do $20 sibling gifts in DH's family. For the next eight years they will get a card saying "Merry Christmas! Instead of giving you a gift, we have decided to take $20 off of the debt you owe us!" We are hoping this will prove our point. No more money will be given to them. I would have just bought food for them instead of giving them money in the first place but they live in another state so that wasn't an option. I'll have to update again after Christmas and let you know what their reaction is! ;)

Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 23, 2012 at 10:40 AM
Replies (31-40):
illinoismommy83
by on Nov. 23, 2012 at 12:07 PM
1 mom liked this

So ask today if she can pay you back now since they obviously have money.

Christmas is great. I love to buy DH stuff. That said, bills come before useless crap.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 8 on Nov. 23, 2012 at 12:07 PM
That is a horrible plan. Horrible.

Quoting Anonymous:

I would comment on that post saying, "Is one of those gifts paying us back the $150 you owe us for the time we bought you food for your family"

CutieCrab
by on Nov. 23, 2012 at 12:12 PM
1 mom liked this
Rule of thumb never lend money with the intention of getting it back.

Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
WhenInRome
by Bronze Member on Nov. 23, 2012 at 12:19 PM
I would say something! My bil and sil did the same thing to us. We lent them $1000 back in 2009, we still haven't seen a dime. But they did go ahead and buy a dog for $1500 and install wood floors and new appliances in a house they are renting!!!
I've learned not to expect to see money again if you lend it out and most importantly, to never give my money away again!
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
LyTe684
by Ruby Member on Nov. 23, 2012 at 12:21 PM
Well, now you know...
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
LyTe684
by Ruby Member on Nov. 23, 2012 at 12:22 PM
Yup! Lending money is like gambling. There's a chance you'll never see that money again. But that's the risk you take.

Quoting CutieCrab:

Rule of thumb never lend money with the intention of getting it back.



Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous 9 on Nov. 23, 2012 at 12:48 PM

Why not post on her wall and ask if your check is on the way since they obviously have extra money since she shopped so much for her husband.?

TranquilMind
by Ruby Member on Nov. 23, 2012 at 12:50 PM
1 mom liked this

Never lend money you can't afford to give away.

Family takes advantage of you more quickly than others.   You won't see it again, most likely, and now your relationship is strained.  Forgive them this and move on, but don't do it again.

You could copy the Facebook quote, and email it to her (don't do this ON Facebook) and state that you would appreciate her meeting her financial obligations before she spends money on Christmas gifts.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 10 on Nov. 23, 2012 at 12:55 PM

I would just be a real bitch and post a reply on her status saying something like "I wish you would have used some of that money to pay back the money we gave you in FEBRUARY. If you have money to blow away you should pay your deps first!"

Fistandantalus
by on Nov. 23, 2012 at 12:59 PM

She probably used credit.

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