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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

The Husbands Of Sahms:)

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

 I have been a proud homemaker for many years.I have seen so much trash talk about sahms on this confession board(from being lazy or uneducated).

My husband is very happy that I am a sahm and have been all these years.He and my kids appreciate all that I do and I have gone to college and had a career.I just prefer to be at home...where I feel happiest:)

If my husband has no problem with me being at home.Why do so many people have a personal issue with it when it is none of their concern?

If you are a sahm how does your husband feel about you being at home?Working moms have you ever discussed being a sahm with your husband?

Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 25, 2012 at 6:41 AM
Replies (31-40):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Nov. 25, 2012 at 7:56 AM
Yes be thankful!!


Quoting Anonymous:

My fiancee doesnt want me to work, he says it is my job to raise the kids and make sure they are well taken care of and his job to work and support us. We make ends meet and do ok. I would prefer to work, until I got with him thats what I did so thats what I am used to. My kids arent his so therefore I feel its my job to support them. But I am very thankful that he has given me the chance to spendmore time with my children.


indymom72
by Silver Member on Nov. 25, 2012 at 7:59 AM

Oh i've done all those things..I live very frugally..make our own laundry soaps, cook from scratch etc...he drag races, so to him 30 dollars is nothing.  When he comes to me and wants 400 dollars he is pissed that I can't give it to him.  He does whatever he wants to do..he goes on drag racing vacations alone 3 or 4 times a year.  He isn't deprived..but to listen to him you would sure think he was.  I appreciate all of your suggestions though..
We start marriage counseling again next week, I hope that will help.  He quit going to the last one because he didn't like hearing that he couldn't be so selfish and have a family.

Quoting Anonymous:

 

Quoting indymom72:

It's a touchy subject in my house.  I'm happy at home, but he doesn't fully appreciate what I do, so it's hard. Even though it's best for our children because he's gone so much..he hates it that he can't just burn money whenever he wants.  He is selfish and spoiled..but says he wants to work on it.  We shall see....

I went through this phase with my dh when my kids were smaller.He wasnt always so appreciative of me being at home...and money would be tight at times.Now he adores me and loves me at home.

What I would do in your case is start tallying up all you save with coupons and cutting back.Let him know you saved $30 bucks this week....etc.

Start looking around town for ideas to do for free and things you can do with friends and family.Mainly try doing something special with him at least twice a month.Encourage him to do something he has always wanted to do.Surprise him with a special meal and alone time.Keep a small savings in a jar,all change,it add up:).Also I love this http://www.swagbucks.com/refer/TiaraMom19

 

Plan financial goals together.Show him its not the money its about saving and making special memories.



TheMrs407
by Emerald Member on Nov. 25, 2012 at 8:02 AM

I have never been a SAHM, though somewhat joke I am one during the summer (teacher).  DH is also a teacher so we have never felt the financial freedom for me (or him) to stay at home.  Both of us really love working and feel we are doing what is best for our family.  Several years ago when many teacher cuts were being made and who was being cut was up in the air, we discussed opening an in home childcare program, but thankfully that's as far as it went.

I see a lot of discussion of SAHM being treated poorly by their husbands here, probably more so than anywhere else.  Perhaps a lot of it is venting, but the SAHMs I know are very happy with the choices they have made.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 6 on Nov. 25, 2012 at 8:02 AM

 This except I am far from lazy. I would switch places with my dh in a heartbeat if it meant I could sleep 8 hours straight undisturbed and the come home after my desk job and take a nap. If it meant I could eat one meal without getting up 15 times to get someone else something or clean up a mess. If it meant I no longer had to clean up everyone all by myself. If it meant I no longer had to do everyone's laundry all by myself. If it meant I no longer had to do all of the grocery shopping while juggling a 5 month old. If it meant I could watch one tv show undisturbed or play video games until 2am then sleep until 10am on my days off. If it meant I could have some sort of interaction with an adult every day. If it meant I could tone out everyone else and just relax every evening. Even if it was for only one frickin day! I have never been so exhausted and overwhelmed until I became a sahm. This job never ends and the environment never changes. My dh seems to think since I don't work he is suddenly void of all responsibility of cleaning up after himself, his children, and "watching" our ds. Since ds was born he gotten up ONE time during the night. It's gone on long enough. Maybe it's sleep deprivation, maybe it's jealousy that his life seems to be unchanged but we are going to have a chat tonight because I'm literally exhausted and sick of being disrespected.

Sorry to rant but I had to get this out or I was going to explode!

Quoting Anonymous:

 

Josie_P
by on Nov. 25, 2012 at 8:05 AM
We've discussed me sah but I just can't find myself to do it. My DH would go along with anything that I choose lol but I think he is happy that I work because I'm happy :)
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Sarina.c.c
by Reen on Nov. 25, 2012 at 8:05 AM
Df is supportive. I was a sahm. I now work full time in a ER. It works for us.
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inmybizz
by Gold Member on Nov. 25, 2012 at 8:05 AM

We discussed me staying home before we got married and had children. I'm happy with our decision.

SlightlyPerfect
by on Nov. 25, 2012 at 8:06 AM

My husband is adamant about me staying home with our DD. Money gets tight sometimes, but we make it work. He says that judging by how happy, well-rounded, educated, and healthy she is, he wouldn't want it any other way. I agree with him. But I have to give up things in order to do this, and that can be difficult sometimes, too.

slightlyperfect

MrsErdos2011
by on Nov. 25, 2012 at 8:07 AM

My husband asked me to be a sahm. When he gets home he helps me cook dinner then helps me do the dishes. We love it, for us it's very intimate to do so,

oceandancer
by Bronze Member on Nov. 25, 2012 at 8:07 AM


Quoting Anonymous:

Yes be thankful!!


Quoting Anonymous:

My fiancee doesnt want me to work, he says it is my job to raise the kids and make sure they are well taken care of and his job to work and support us. We make ends meet and do ok. I would prefer to work, until I got with him thats what I did so thats what I am used to. My kids arent his so therefore I feel its my job to support them. But I am very thankful that he has given me the chance to spendmore time with my children.



I am very thankful and my kids love it too, it was a big adjustment, he makes significantly less than I  did, but there is no more daycare and I just learned to save and not spend as much wasteful money. As in we eat at home instead of at restaurants, I cook from scratch, and we just look for bargains.

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