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Evil step mother here. ***update on page 40*******

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
I'm beyond pissed and if this makes me an evil step mother, so be it. My husbands ex wife just called. She told us my husbands daughter got two speeding tickets this month. The first one she was gong 80 in a 55 zone and the second was yesterday, she was going 85 in a 45 zone. She is 19. The combined fines for both tickets is a total of 600 to keep her from losing her license. So, my husband told her mom we would pay it. I think this time I have a right to be pissed. Dh is going to take it out of the money we have saved for the kids christmas. So guess what that means ??? Yep, all the stuff we have on lay a way will get put back and we will be lucky to buy them a few things. That money was saved for a reason. My step daughters presents were coming out of it as well. But now it's all going to pay her fucking speeding tickets. I'm livid. I understand its his daughter and he doesn't want her to get in trouble , but she is 19 and knows better than to speed. I'm in tears. Am I wrong for feeling this way ??? I'm going to get the stuff out of lay a way. I'm sure my husband will be upset with me but oh well. I'll update again later.
Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 26, 2012 at 11:02 AM
Replies (511-519):
babie113
by Ruby Member on Nov. 27, 2012 at 6:58 PM
Hugs I'm sorry. She needs to grow up and pay her own fine she's not a child anymore.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Nov. 27, 2012 at 6:58 PM
1 mom liked this
We have it worked out now, and everything is good. We are giving her the money we were going to spend on her presents from us to put toward her fines and that's it. He told her mom she would have to come up with the rest.

Quoting Anonymous:

She needs to pay it herself or she will never learn and keep doing it. The fine is supposed to punish and correct the behavior. Its not teaching her anything by her dad bailing her out. Just that she can do as she pleases. Hugs I'm sorry your kids have to suffer because of it.
grace1973
by on Nov. 27, 2012 at 6:58 PM

I'm very glad to see that it worked out in a way that made sense to BOTH of you.  :) 

Quoting Anonymous:

Exactly, he told me before we got married, he wanted to take care of me and it be that I could stay home and raise our children. He also told me from day one his money is my money as well and we make decisions together. After he had time to think about this yesterday he apologized to me and said I shouldn't have said that without talking to you first and figuring out what to do. The situation is worked out now and everything is great.

Quoting grace1973:

I gathered from the post it is THEIR money.  Married couples generally make financial decisions together. 


Quoting Anonymous:

If you don't like how he spends his money than you get a job and make your own.



Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Nov. 27, 2012 at 7:00 PM
1 mom liked this
Thank you :) it was just a bad day.

Quoting grace1973:

I'm very glad to see that it worked out in a way that made sense to BOTH of you.  :) 


Quoting Anonymous:

Exactly, he told me before we got married, he wanted to take care of me and it be that I could stay home and raise our children. He also told me from day one his money is my money as well and we make decisions together. After he had time to think about this yesterday he apologized to me and said I shouldn't have said that without talking to you first and figuring out what to do. The situation is worked out now and everything is great.



Quoting grace1973:

I gathered from the post it is THEIR money.  Married couples generally make financial decisions together. 



Quoting Anonymous:

If you don't like how he spends his money than you get a job and make your own.



Anonymous
by Anonymous on Nov. 27, 2012 at 8:55 PM
If she isn't working for it, she has not right to tell him what he can't so with it, sorry ;)


Quoting grace1973:

I gathered from the post it is THEIR money.  Married couples generally make financial decisions together. 


Quoting Anonymous:

If you don't like how he spends his money than you get a job and make your own.



grace1973
by on Nov. 27, 2012 at 9:37 PM
I'm sorry I didn't realize I was on the CafeMom Afghanistan website. Here in America people are partners when they get married, and women are not chattel.


Quoting Anonymous:

Thank you :) it was just a bad day.



Quoting grace1973:

I'm very glad to see that it worked out in a way that made sense to BOTH of you.  :) 



Quoting Anonymous:

Exactly, he told me before we got married, he wanted to take care of me and it be that I could stay home and raise our children. He also told me from day one his money is my money as well and we make decisions together. After he had time to think about this yesterday he apologized to me and said I shouldn't have said that without talking to you first and figuring out what to do. The situation is worked out now and everything is great.





Quoting grace1973:

I gathered from the post it is THEIR money.  Married couples generally make financial decisions together. 




Quoting Anonymous:

If you don't like how he spends his money than you get a job and make your own.




Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Nov. 27, 2012 at 11:28 PM
That's what I thought lol apparently being a stay at home mom means I'm a mooch and lazy. That's news to me.

Quoting grace1973:

I'm sorry I didn't realize I was on the CafeMom Afghanistan website. Here in America people are partners when they get married, and women are not chattel.




Quoting Anonymous:

Thank you :) it was just a bad day.





Quoting grace1973:

I'm very glad to see that it worked out in a way that made sense to BOTH of you.  :) 




Quoting Anonymous:

Exactly, he told me before we got married, he wanted to take care of me and it be that I could stay home and raise our children. He also told me from day one his money is my money as well and we make decisions together. After he had time to think about this yesterday he apologized to me and said I shouldn't have said that without talking to you first and figuring out what to do. The situation is worked out now and everything is great.







Quoting grace1973:

I gathered from the post it is THEIR money.  Married couples generally make financial decisions together. 





Quoting Anonymous:

If you don't like how he spends his money than you get a job and make your own.




KeimUNCmomof3
by Gold Member on Nov. 27, 2012 at 11:31 PM

Did she have an allowance growing up (any saved $$$) or a job?  She needs to pay her own speeding tickets.  That's ridiculous.  NO, you are NOT an evil step mother.  You are thinking logically.  Your husband is babying his daughter.   She is being a spoiled brat, getting away with that.

grace1973
by on Nov. 27, 2012 at 11:45 PM
Oh geez. Sorry! It's not always easy for me to see sarcasm when I read it. :)


Quoting grace1973:

I'm sorry I didn't realize I was on the CafeMom Afghanistan website. Here in America people are partners when they get married, and women are not chattel.




Quoting Anonymous:

Thank you :) it was just a bad day.





Quoting grace1973:

I'm very glad to see that it worked out in a way that made sense to BOTH of you.  :) 




Quoting Anonymous:

Exactly, he told me before we got married, he wanted to take care of me and it be that I could stay home and raise our children. He also told me from day one his money is my money as well and we make decisions together. After he had time to think about this yesterday he apologized to me and said I shouldn't have said that without talking to you first and figuring out what to do. The situation is worked out now and everything is great.







Quoting grace1973:

I gathered from the post it is THEIR money.  Married couples generally make financial decisions together. 





Quoting Anonymous:

If you don't like how he spends his money than you get a job and make your own.





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