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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

My prayer was answered in such a specific way, and now all I want to do is give praises!

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
I'm going anonymous simply because of the personal & financial info involved in the story...

My husband and I have always been *pretty good* about managing our money. Granted, there are decisions I can look back on now and wish we'd made differently, but we've always had a savings account in place, and aside from the rare occasion we drew from it to help cover an unexpected expense, it was always growing little by little.
By the time I got pregnant, we were married, living in a small but nice apartment, had found our church and were tithing 10% of our income, he was working his current job bringing in about $3500-$4000 each month, and I had graduated college and started my career bringing home $2000-$2500 each month. Both of our cars were paid off, as well as my student loans. We were in a very good financial position in terms of being ready for a baby.
We had been debating buying a house, and once I was pregnant, we knew our apartment would be too small for our family. We found and fell in love with our house, and were moved in by the time I was 7 months along.
Then things took a turn.
In the last year and a half, we've had to buy another vehicle (mine died), buy a new rim and four new tires for his SUV, and have had other unplanned expenses; I was unable to breastfeed as planned because of previously-undetected medical issues, had to do a major repair on our home, etc. Before buying our home, I left my job to be a SAHM until our son starts school, and we bought our home knowing that we would need to live frugally in order to make it. Looking back, we didn't leave enough room for error.
Our mortgage is $1500/mo, which includes paying about $60 extra each month toward principal. Our son, as it turns out, was very sensitive in what type of formula he could take, which meant added expense, and my husband received a "promotion" that actually has become a pay cut because he is unable to work overtime in this position (but it does afford more opportunity for advancement). I recently started a part-time job to help make up the difference, but it hasn't been enough. This week, our savings officially reached $58.
Fast forward to present. We both got paid yesterday (him $1400, me $200), and our mortgage will be due the first, which meant I would need to pay the mortgage late and use these funds to pay all of our bills (utilities, homeowner's insurance, car insurance, phone bill,credit card that we had to use recently) and provide everything else we need for the next month. I babysat yesterday for a bit and used that $20 in cash to run to the store today and grab some small items. On the way home, my low fuel light came on, and I finally gave in and started to cry. I pulled to the side of the road and just let it out.
I realized that although we'd been doing charity work and helping others, I hadn't been truly humble in that I had an attitude that WE were doing well, WE were keeping ourselves in a good situation, etc. Then I prayed. I said "God, I realize why you've brought us to this place of uncertainty and what we are to gain from it. I am so incredibly grateful for this lesson, and that we've been able to learn this lesson while still having a comfortable home. I know YOU will provide for us, and have been all along. The things we have been 'going without' are so trivial in comparison to what you've given us, and I pray you will continue to keep us able to afford the home we are in."
I drove the rest of the way home, grabbed the mail out of the box, and started weeding through it (dreading finding any bills). There was an item from the bank we have our mortgage through, and my heart absolutely sank, thinking that it was some kind of bad news...
It was a money order for $2,045.23 as a refund for overpayment into our escrow (our property taxes were overestimated, and this much is left over)! I just broke down and said a prayer of thanks. I wanted to share this story with anyone who is struggling in hopes of showing people that prayer is a powerful thing.
Keep your chin up, be humble, and give it to God. He'll take care of you!

1 Peter 5.6-7:
Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you at the proper time, casting all your anxiety on Him, because he cares for you.

Deuteronomy 31.6:
Be strong and bold, have no fear or dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not fail you or forsake you.

Please know that you are not going to shake my faith. I am open to respectful discussion, but bashing will just go unanswered.
Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 28, 2012 at 4:18 PM
Replies (281-290):
MamaHasWings
by on Nov. 30, 2012 at 9:57 AM

This post put a smile on my face. So glad that things turned out good for you and your family :)

Anonymous
by Anonymous 36 on Nov. 30, 2012 at 10:52 AM
Yes many prayers were said and maybe I was just asking too much but it just crushed my faith in a time of my life when I was barely hanging on anyways.

Quoting harehelper:

Did you ask God personally to help you get the rent money on time?

Quoting Anonymous:

 I'm happy that this helped you.


I was told by a very good friend that no matter the situation I was in that God would be there to help and make everything right. I had to question my friend and ask how? How will God pay my rent? How would God pay my bills and take my stress away. I had 7 days to come up with $500. He told me God would find a way. Well he didn't and I was officially out in the street. Ever since then I don't even try with God. I don't know. Maybe it was all a test and I failed. At this point in my life I just don't believe anymore. I think others believe because it makes them feel like they have a purpose. Just too many unanswered questions for me. All of my family are very religious so I just don't bring it up to them. I'm sure they have no clue how I really feel.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 43 on Nov. 30, 2012 at 10:55 AM
God is good. Everytime we have worried, but shown how thankful we are for what we DO have, we have received even without asking. God knows our needs.
Elle.tea.22
by Ruby Member on Nov. 30, 2012 at 11:06 AM
I'm not all that religious but YAY! :) my mom says "When god invites you somewhere, he foots the bill", that's what I always keep in mind when times get tough.

We had just moved in together when we got pregnant. His last day of work was 5 months away (he was only there for a year) and I was struggling with school and work and life for some reason. A baby was soooo not planned but everything turned around. He found an amazing job that payed more than the previous one for half the time, which also gave him time for a part time twice a week at his dream job, I got back on track at work and everything else just fell into place.

Sometimes people say "I can't have this baby because I can't afford it" and all I can think is "When god invites you somewhere, he foots the bill". So what if you don't have the baby or give it away.. And stuff turns around? Wouldn't you feel bad that you could have provided after all? I know I got a little off topic but that's as far as my sad amount of faith has taken me. And for someone with a lack of faith, it stretches out pretty damn far! You are better than I am so I think better things should come your way! And keep in mind, he will foot the bill ;)
Anonymous
by Anonymous 44 on Nov. 30, 2012 at 11:12 AM
Quoting Anonymous:




Sometimes we ask for the wrong thing. We can't ask god to feed the hungry children, we must ask for people to give their time, money and effort to feed the children. Inspire them to. God won't walk into the bank and pay your rent. Ask for your health to get better so you can find a job, ask for an opportunity to open up for you, ask for the strength and discipline to get through a day of work only to get home to take care of your kids and not be too tired to do it all again tomorrow. Pray for harmony in your home so you actually feel rested when you lay down to sleep...
harehelper
by Platinum Member on Nov. 30, 2012 at 9:31 PM

Do you know what triggered the change in your life? Is there any event or happening that you could point to and say "This is where it all started going wrong"?

There are some bits in your post that I highlighted... These are statements that make it sound like you are still trying to make things happen on your own, so to speak. The first one especially, the whole point of turning to God is because WE CANNOT get through life on our own. There is no way to do it on your own, we have to have God's help. The strength that you have is not yours, it's something that God has given you.

 BTW, there is nothing wrong with praying for money. Praying to get rich or something is probably not a great idea, but if you need money to feed and care for your family there is nothing wrong with asking for it.

Something else in your post I would like to clarify. You said at the beginning that you have "never really prayed or asked for anything" but then you say lower down that you have communicated. Those two statements don't go together. Picture it like your relationship with your best friend. If all your conversations with your friend always consisted just of asking her/him for something you need or requests for a favor, how would that make your friend feel? What would it do to your relationship with your friend? Talk to God just like you would a friend. Tell Him about your day, talk about things that went well or things that didn't and tell Him how that made you feel. You don't have to go off in another room or kneel down to pray, you can chat with Him while you get housework done or whatever. I do a lot of praying while I am driving around getting my errands run.

Can I ask how much time you spend reading the Bible? That is an excellent way to spend time with God, and it also really helps you get to know Him. Before you sit down to read, just ask Him to give you understanding about what you are reading.

Quoting Anonymous:

No, I don't take it as harsh and that is why I asked you! I knew you would give an honest answer.
I've never prayed or asked for anything really beyond the please protect and watch over my children, please give me strength type thing, I've never prayed for money or such. I've always been thankful for what I do have.
I've always thought our faith and devotion to Him was giving back to Him.
I have communicated, I have believed, I've had faith, I've been humble and thankful, I've asked forgiveness of my sins etc.
I've begged for some sign, a way to get beyond what has been tragic in my life. I've begged to not be alone, to not suffer any more. I've told Him I cannot carry any more on my shoulders, I've asked for a reprieve, peace etc. I've asked for some sign or way to be able to do this on my own,I am willing to do what it takes for this crap storm to just stop!
I've tried so hard to hold on to my faith, not because I felt I had to but because I felt it was right, that I was always right in the faith I did have.
It's difficult to explain. There is only so much one person can take. I have strength, I wouldn't have survived if I didn't but there is only so much one can carry before they break.
In all honesty, during the most difficult time in my life, when I held on to my faith tighter than I ever have before, I felt abandoned by Him. I always felt Him before, in my belief, in my faith and in everything around me. I am sure it sounds corny but I always felt Him, i knew i wasnt alone even in the bad times, and one day that was gone. I can tell you before that that I did experience blessings, I did get answers and some were not what I wanted to hear but were the right answers for us in the end, I did have answered prayers, some not the way I was hoping they would be but they were answered in His way which was the best way for us.
Since then our family has had the worst things happening constantly, it's like a dark cloud hovers above us and no matter what I do for myself and my children nothing good comes of anything I touch. We had a beautiful and blessed life and it seemed like a switch was flipped and what good we had went in the absolute opposite direction.
It has been two years of failing health with no answers, and nothing but dibilitating pain, my 3rd ds was hurt badly and has suffered the last 7 yrs, its been never ending health issues, money issues, family issues, marriage issues when all of these things were my very reason to exist. I felt I was living my path and when that all changed I was willing to walk a new path, but that path has been almost impossible, I get ahead a few steps and I am pushed back several more.
I turn to God as always, as how I was raised and I don't feel his presence in my life anymore. I know it sounds like I've turned away from him but I didn't, I held on! Now don't think that I am crazy with this next statement, I'm not I promise! I feel like our beautiful life back then was filled with light. I woke up every morning loving life and went to bed knowing I would wake up again loving life. Now, it seems like our life is dark, not evil, I'm not implying that just dark. I go to bed knowing life will be the same and wondering what will happen next. I hate living this way and I do wish faith was the answer because I have that to give freely!
Anyway, thanks for your explanations! I appreciate you taking the time!

Quoting harehelper:

But I didn't say there is no reason or explanation. I said that no human being can tell you what that reason is, because God is the only one who knows the whole picture. Yes, I feel sure there is a definite reason. But I will not presume to try and guess at what that reason is, I don't know enough to do so.

The very definition of grace is an undeserved favor, or pardon. His grace is like a blessing that He gives us freely, when we can not give back or pay Him back in any way.

We can't earn God's grace because we can't ever be perfect. God and his love, His grace, etc are all totally perfect, and no matter how hard we try we can never achieve that perfection. That is why he sent His Son to die for us, so that we can believe in Him and be forgiven of our sins. We can't be perfect enough to deserve God's love, but because of Jesus's sacrifice, we don't need to be!

When OP said she got that check because she deserved it, what she meant was that it was a blessing from God because she turned to Him, asked Him to forgive her of her pride, and honestly was sorry for her mistake.

I'm sorry, but you are wrong on your last part. God absolutely can answer your questions, and He absolutely can change anything in this world and beyond. But you have to go to Him and ask!! He won't chase you down and yell the answers in your ear, He wants you to ask Him. He wants you to communicate with Him. And if you have it dead set in your mind that He can't or won't ever speak to you, or answer your questions, or help/change anything, then that is exactly what you will NOT get.

No one said that the OP is getting blessings and you are getting wrath. If you honestly believe that God can't answer your questions, or change your circumstances, then He won't. I am not intending any harshness here, I hope it is not coming across that way, I just feel it is very important  to try and clarify this for you.

Quoting Anonymous:

I respect your belief, I really do so this isn't an arguement but curiousity.

This is always the answer to the bad things in life, it's Gods plan, there is no reason, there is an unseen plan yet when something good happens its all Gods work/doing. How does that work? Live Gods way, have faith, believe, trust spread Gods word etc. and you deserve or have earned the good but the bad never has a reason or explanation.

"He gives us grace even when not deserved" what is Gods grace?

"you can't earn Gods grace, it isn't possible" " He gives us grace when not deserved" what do you mean by that?

OP said her prayers were answered because she deserved it.

God cannot answer these questions and God cannot change these things, that is obvious. If I have lived my life devoted to Him just like OP then why are her good things Gods gift and my bad things are not Gods wrath? It doesn't make sense.



Quoting harehelper:


Quoting Anonymous:

Since this post is filled with so many that are spiritual I'm curious, why I've lived a life of faith, honesty, giving etc and yet my family has suffered some of the most awful things. Ive worked my tail off my whole life being good and providing for my family and more yet it is one crappy thing after another. If I told you all that we continue to go through you would see that we can't catch a break. It isn't the fault of choices, decisions, irresponsibility etc. it just happens. Meanwhile my sil whom is anything but honesty and good has her life just handed to her. She doesn't work for it, she doesn't do anything to earn Gods special favors.


Why is that? Why do I devote my childhood, teen years and most of my adult years to serving and nothing good comes to our family?


No, I don't expect anything that i havent worked for in return but why does our life suck day after day, year after year if there is a loving, kind and honorable God that I've given myself to for so long? For so long I DID expect our family to be blessed with the good energy that we were giving out.


There is always an answer for the good, God answered my prayers, God blessed us etc. but never for the bad. We haven't earned it, we don't deserve it so what purpose does it serve?

There are answers for everything, but that doesn't mean we will be able to see them. You can't ever "earn" God's favor, or God's grace, it isn't possible. That is why it is called grace, because He gives it to us even when we don't deserve it. Grace comes through faith, not through works.

 No human being will be able to tell you why you are struggling, because no human being knows either your heart/mind, or God's plan for your life. Only God can answer these questions for you.



Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Nov. 30, 2012 at 9:43 PM
Sorry for disappearing; I was able to pick up two extra shifts at work over the last two days :)
harehelper
by Platinum Member on Nov. 30, 2012 at 9:55 PM

Here is the wonderful thing about being a follower of Jesus though. Yeah, Job's children died. But death can only separate us temporarily, we will see our loved ones again once our time to leave this world comes. He got his children back.

The story of Job is of course a rough one, and it is very hard even for a lot of mature believers to handle. Personally I see it as a valuable life lesson. So long as we live on this earth, we are going to go through things that are going painful, frustrating, and that mabye even don't make a lick of sense in our point of view.

I would like to ask for clarification on the last part of your post. What are you trying to say when you speak of the millinois of Christian martyrs, and what do you mean by a "magical Jesus that answers everyone's whims"?

Quoting kidlover2:

I actually brought up Job because most religious people won't touch that story with a ten foot pole. God allowed Job to go through all that essentially on a bet with Satan. Job lost all of his children... that's fantastic Job got all of his stuff back in excess.... you really think that made up for the loss of his children? More children never takes away the pain from the loss of a deceased child. I am a Christian myself. I am asking the OP to think deeply. Yes God can work miracles. Sometimes nature takes a large part.... I'm not questioning her faith in God or her belief that God answered her prayer. Peter was crucified upside down. Millions of Christians have been tortured and fed to wild animals since Jesus's time..... this magical Jesus that answers everyone's whims are neither logical nor biblical. Make sure your prayers are God focused and not me focused.

Quoting harehelper:

Job suffered greatly, but he stayed faithful to God through it all. And God healed him, and he wound up wealthier and better off than before his trial. When you are going through hard times, the only thing to do is to keep on praying and telling God about it. It is hard to see, but there really is a light at the end of your tunnel, and God WILL answer your prayers.

Quoting kidlover2:

That's great. But what do you have to say to the people who have been faithful and praying to God for years and are still struggling. What would you say to someone who is having a "Job" experience?



twilightmom6545
by Bronze Member on Dec. 1, 2012 at 1:05 AM

 Amen! Praise the Lord and I am soooo happy for you! Give thanks to the Lord for he is good!

 

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Dec. 1, 2012 at 1:09 AM
1 mom liked this
Thanks :)
I'm still on cloud 9, just knowing that we are so blessed, and much more grounded than we were in terms of our attitude!


Quoting twilightmom6545:

 Amen! Praise the Lord and I am soooo happy for you! Give thanks to the Lord for he is good!


 


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