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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Way to make my worth as 2 dollar tramp

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
My boyfriend and I have been dating 4 months. I have yet to be intimate with him and I wanted to plan to get a hotel on New Year's Eve.

I think that New Year's Eve would be such a special way to ring In the new year for the both of us.

Last night we were checking prices, and he made a joke about getting this super cheap hotel, one that looked like crap..

I mean really? Yeah it was a "joke", but like they say.. " there is always a little truth behind a "I'm just kidding"

He made me feel like crap.

I told him.. "You know what? Forget it then.. We'll just not do that"

He ignored what I said, and we continued talking about it..

I mean, I'm trying to make it special, but he's making me feel so stupid about it.

We have to get a hotel bc we both live with our parents at the moment, an we're def not going to be intimate in their homes, a I totally refuse to do it a car the first time..

I'm thinking of just forgetting the whole idea, and just making him wait even longer..

I don't just want to sleep with someone just because.. I'm not like that

How would you have felt?!
Posted by Anonymous on Dec. 3, 2012 at 10:51 AM
Replies (151-160):
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Dec. 3, 2012 at 12:23 PM
It's not like I was asking for a 300 dollar a night hotel.. /:

I just didn't want to go to an ugly one.. Lol. We found a beautiful hotel for 100 bucks. That's 50 each. We both har 50 to spend. We are not that poor. Lol.

He just picked out some ugly one. I'm sure he was just wanting a reaction, but I can never tell when he is joking. He sounded so serious.. Lol

Our plans were to get to the hotel by 3, hang out by the pool, get ready together, go to dinner, then hang out downtown for the New Years Eve celebrations. After the celebration, walk back to the hotel and spend the evening together. The next day, Wake up and head for breakfast.. It sounds so nice for the both of us :) no kids, no phones, just us..


Quoting Mrs.Kubalabuku:

Can you compromise on a nice mid-grade hotel?  I mean, how much time will you spend at the hotel anyways?  Dinner and a movie will take up a large chunk of the night, then whatever happens at the hotel, fall asleep, check out by 11am, kwim?  Or splurge on the fancy hotel, but take dinner from home to reheat, a bottle of wine or champagne for the new year drinks, and "picnic" on the bed with some DVDs of your favorite movies.  Or swimsuits and use the hotel pool for entertainment prior to settling down for the night.


Quoting Anonymous:

You are absolutely right...





Quoting Mrs.Kubalabuku:

I can see where you are coming from, but I think you are having the wrong reaction.

If you are both living with your parents, I'm guessing money IS a concern?  Perhaps he's catching some heat b/c he's living with parents and planning on dropping a lot of money on one night like that?  Or maybe it's just in the back of his mind that you two are trying to get to a better financial place?  I don't think he's implying you are a two bit whore.  I think he's implying he's worried about money, and to a guy a bed is a bed.

So instead of calling it all off, talk it out.  Figure out some plans for the future to get better financial footing and hopefully out on your own again.  While money may be a concern, you can't NEVER have a treat or a special night, people don't tend to get out of their financial troubles that way.  They end up crumbling under the strain.

AND

You are not a virgin, but your first time with him is special.  Just keep it in perspective.  This is your first time together, and it will be what YOU BOTH make of it.  If he's going to be worried about money the whole time, and you're worried about the impression the hotel makes, it won't be that great.  You want it to feel natural, not forced, stressful, or contrived.  So plan a romantic evening that focuses on you two as a couple, not on sex itself.  If the sex happens, great.  If not, great.  You still bonded as a couple, right?





Mrs.Kubalabuku
by Ruby Member on Dec. 3, 2012 at 12:36 PM

Well, then set up a budget for the night.  Whether he was just going for a reaction or not, you do need a budget.  Show him that you can have fun while still being money-conscious.  I think based on a lot of your replies, he is worried about the money.  So you each contribute $50 to the hotel, and $50 to the night's celebration, and it isn't so bad, kwim?  Then just don't overspend.  You don't need the money to have a good time, it's just a nice perk if you decide to grab dessert or a drink after dinner.  lol.

I've been there.  DH and I were both financially independent when we were 19.  We got married at 20 (he was 21) and have been on our own ever since.  Sometimes when I'm planning a romantic evening, he makes jokes about dinner at Applebee's or catching the matinee at the theater.  It isn't that a dinner at Applebee's is terrible, or a matinee is bad, but it makes me feel down b/c I think our relationship is worth the splurge once in a while.  In 7 years of marriage, he finally is starting to understand that sometimes I like something a bit more classy.  I'll go to the greasy spoon with him and the guys and such, we've had sex in the car before, but once in a while we are going to dress nice and go somewhere fancy and treat me like a lady.

Just make sure you are keeping the night special for him, too.  Let things flow naturally.  Don't over plan the night, don't overthink reactions.  Just live for the moment within your budget and see what happens.  Focus on each other and just enjoy yourselves.

Quoting Anonymous:

It's not like I was asking for a 300 dollar a night hotel.. /:

I just didn't want to go to an ugly one.. Lol. We found a beautiful hotel for 100 bucks. That's 50 each. We both har 50 to spend. We are not that poor. Lol.

He just picked out some ugly one. I'm sure he was just wanting a reaction, but I can never tell when he is joking. He sounded so serious.. Lol

Our plans were to get to the hotel by 3, hang out by the pool, get ready together, go to dinner, then hang out downtown for the New Years Eve celebrations. After the celebration, walk back to the hotel and spend the evening together. The next day, Wake up and head for breakfast.. It sounds so nice for the both of us :) no kids, no phones, just us..


Quoting Mrs.Kubalabuku:

Can you compromise on a nice mid-grade hotel?  I mean, how much time will you spend at the hotel anyways?  Dinner and a movie will take up a large chunk of the night, then whatever happens at the hotel, fall asleep, check out by 11am, kwim?  Or splurge on the fancy hotel, but take dinner from home to reheat, a bottle of wine or champagne for the new year drinks, and "picnic" on the bed with some DVDs of your favorite movies.  Or swimsuits and use the hotel pool for entertainment prior to settling down for the night.


Quoting Anonymous:

You are absolutely right...





Quoting Mrs.Kubalabuku:

I can see where you are coming from, but I think you are having the wrong reaction.

If you are both living with your parents, I'm guessing money IS a concern?  Perhaps he's catching some heat b/c he's living with parents and planning on dropping a lot of money on one night like that?  Or maybe it's just in the back of his mind that you two are trying to get to a better financial place?  I don't think he's implying you are a two bit whore.  I think he's implying he's worried about money, and to a guy a bed is a bed.

So instead of calling it all off, talk it out.  Figure out some plans for the future to get better financial footing and hopefully out on your own again.  While money may be a concern, you can't NEVER have a treat or a special night, people don't tend to get out of their financial troubles that way.  They end up crumbling under the strain.

AND

You are not a virgin, but your first time with him is special.  Just keep it in perspective.  This is your first time together, and it will be what YOU BOTH make of it.  If he's going to be worried about money the whole time, and you're worried about the impression the hotel makes, it won't be that great.  You want it to feel natural, not forced, stressful, or contrived.  So plan a romantic evening that focuses on you two as a couple, not on sex itself.  If the sex happens, great.  If not, great.  You still bonded as a couple, right?






CoolRelax
by Platinum Member on Dec. 3, 2012 at 1:18 PM

Mrs. K is my e-therapist, she's one of the most reasonable and thoughtful people on cm.   

Quoting Anonymous:

You are absolutely right...


Quoting Mrs.Kubalabuku:

I can see where you are coming from, but I think you are having the wrong reaction.

If you are both living with your parents, I'm guessing money IS a concern?  Perhaps he's catching some heat b/c he's living with parents and planning on dropping a lot of money on one night like that?  Or maybe it's just in the back of his mind that you two are trying to get to a better financial place?  I don't think he's implying you are a two bit whore.  I think he's implying he's worried about money, and to a guy a bed is a bed.

So instead of calling it all off, talk it out.  Figure out some plans for the future to get better financial footing and hopefully out on your own again.  While money may be a concern, you can't NEVER have a treat or a special night, people don't tend to get out of their financial troubles that way.  They end up crumbling under the strain.

AND

You are not a virgin, but your first time with him is special.  Just keep it in perspective.  This is your first time together, and it will be what YOU BOTH make of it.  If he's going to be worried about money the whole time, and you're worried about the impression the hotel makes, it won't be that great.  You want it to feel natural, not forced, stressful, or contrived.  So plan a romantic evening that focuses on you two as a couple, not on sex itself.  If the sex happens, great.  If not, great.  You still bonded as a couple, right?


 

Celtic_Dragon
by Gold Member on Dec. 3, 2012 at 1:22 PM

What happens if you spend all that money on a fancy hotel and he cums in 2 seconds flat? Maybe THAT is the truth behind his joke.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Dec. 3, 2012 at 1:54 PM
It's not like we haven't done ANYTHING. Lol. ;)


Quoting Celtic_Dragon:

What happens if you spend all that money on a fancy hotel and he cums in 2 seconds flat? Maybe THAT is the truth behind his joke.


Katrina316
by Gold Member on Dec. 3, 2012 at 1:55 PM
I knew someone was eventually going to say that and after reading my response, I realized that's what it sounds like. That is of course not my intentions. I just think that a man should do whatever it takes to make his woman happy, not only financially. When I feel he's earned it (not the word I'm looking for) then I'll give it up.


Quoting Jalestra:

You know you just made yourself sound like a hooker right?

Look, I'm all for not handing it out to every guy on the street but you women need to know..when you make them "work" for it and "pay" for it and buy you dinner...YOU are the one saying you're a hooker. YOU just tied that sex up in trade.

I've never made a man "pay" for it in any fashion. JAt no point have I ever told a man they need to "work" for it and "spend money" on it. Wow. They only thing that mattered to me was if we both wanted it and cared enough about each other to make it good. And if I wasn't attracted, then buying me all the gifts and dinner in the world wouldn't make it happen...

Wow.

.

Quoting Katrina316:


Why should she get over herself? Nowadays women just give it up to anyone that they are "dating". Just because she isn't a virgin doesn't mean that it shouldn't be special. Men need to work to have sex. I'm not going to just give it up, you have to spend money on it and I have to feel like you're worth it.





Quoting sfkdny:

it's just sex, if you are in a RELATIONSHIP and are not a virgin, I think you need to get over yourself.. this is not the crowned jewel you are offering, just sex





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jynkx
by on Dec. 3, 2012 at 1:55 PM

calm down, he was trying to be funny.  why are you so uptight?

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Dec. 3, 2012 at 2:18 PM
Whats his excuse for living with his parents? I've come on hard times, I bucked up and handled my shit. Falling back on mommy and daddy wasn't an option.

Quoting Anonymous:

I'm not actually a high class hooker, per se.


I haven't booked the hotel room yet ;)


As for our parents supporting us.. True. Our parents do support us, as of now. I fell on hard times.. There is nothing wrong with that


Quoting Anonymous:

Ok so an expensive hotel means you're a high class hooker. Both of you can't support yourselves without mommy and daddy helping. Thats the problem!


Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Dec. 3, 2012 at 2:27 PM
Read the repliesssss


Quoting Anonymous:

Whats his excuse for living with his parents? I've come on hard times, I bucked up and handled my shit. Falling back on mommy and daddy wasn't an option.



Quoting Anonymous:

I'm not actually a high class hooker, per se.



I haven't booked the hotel room yet ;)



As for our parents supporting us.. True. Our parents do support us, as of now. I fell on hard times.. There is nothing wrong with that



Quoting Anonymous:

Ok so an expensive hotel means you're a high class hooker. Both of you can't support yourselves without mommy and daddy helping. Thats the problem!



Anonymous
by Anonymous on Dec. 3, 2012 at 2:35 PM
Not diggin through this fuckery.

Quoting Anonymous:

Read the repliesssss




Quoting Anonymous:

Whats his excuse for living with his parents? I've come on hard times, I bucked up and handled my shit. Falling back on mommy and daddy wasn't an option.





Quoting Anonymous:

I'm not actually a high class hooker, per se.




I haven't booked the hotel room yet ;)




As for our parents supporting us.. True. Our parents do support us, as of now. I fell on hard times.. There is nothing wrong with that




Quoting Anonymous:

Ok so an expensive hotel means you're a high class hooker. Both of you can't support yourselves without mommy and daddy helping. Thats the problem!



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